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rgz Jan 2019
he exclaimed, she hinted, he nodded and prodded

they giggled and whispered, he retorted, she snorted

he vehemently seethed, she triumphantly screamed

and no one said anything
i hate it
when trump meets with putin
the one shows his routine
the other goes bump
when he bows over his ****
just to fail with his gross highfalutin'
Chris Neilson Jan 2017
If Trump played a trombone or trumpet
he'd say, "like it or lump it"

If Trump called a woman a strumpet
he'd say, "like it or lump it"

If Trump preached hate from a pulpit
he'd say, "like it or lump it"

If Trump gets dumped on his ****
would he "like it or lump it"?
Tee Hee Jan 2015
Did you just ask me out?
Tryin' to ply me with flowers!
Well nice try, Mister Aquaman,
But get some super powers.

A girl like me can't risk it,
I ain't no downtown baby!
Your devotion and a dollar, sir,
Would buy me a coffee, maybe.

You know it's true, this ****'s too fine,
For your sweaty meat hooks there;
It's something else you'll have to grip,
Don't feel the need to share.

Well there's my flight, my throne in the sky;
I look down in safety as the peasants roll by,
I know they'd like to spin a slice of my pie,
But this pie in the sky is priced too **** high!

Back on my island, beach volleyball season.
Which color bikini? Somethin' right for some breezin'
Or just playin' naked, I don't need no **** reason!
My big ******* out for some major crowd pleasin'!

Well that was sure fun, a day in the sun!
I didn't forget you, Mr. Pop Gun;
You would have loved it, this tan honey bun,
But you ain't been swimmin'; you're dry as a nun.

Before I forget you, just thought you should know:
This *****'s so fly, it's pressurized, yo
And though upon you this hot wind won't blow,
You can ask "Would she love me?" An emphatic no.
Lol, sorry guys, I am just too hot for you. I try to be up front about this sort of thing so I don't break any hearts, tee hee! Don't let your unworthiness stop you from rating my poem highly, though! I have been known to do favors for my fanfriends!*

*If they're as hot as an Austrian masseur LOL!

— The End —