we all seek the truth
walking around blindly
but we cannot find the truth
until we find ourselves
truly.

It is 2:13 AM.  I am up thinking, dreaming –
Yet still awake.
My dreams are my reality.
My imagination keeps me awake.
Brain is flooding with creativity,
Yearning to pour out –
A w a k e.

My dreams are my reality
Mind filled with blissful negativity – awake.
Dreaming of unorthodox fantasies.
Eyes wide open but mind floating in another realm – awake.

Blood flowing
Fingers throbbing
Pulse pumping
Heart skipping
A l i v e.

I fall, I fail but I still strive.
My mind aligned
With stars and planets – unconfined.
Letting go, trying to find
The mysteries of  
L i f e.

Are these mysteries meant to be discovered
Are they meant to be uncovered?
Everyone hovers
Till the day reality is
R e v e a l e d.

See, the world we live in
It’s a mere mirage created by oneself.
Lies created to hinder discovery.
Truth buried
Deep, deep down under
Not meant to be
U n c o v e r e d.

The beauty of life that it’s m a j e s t i c
Life blown into our bodies
Temporare - ily
Until the time for departure
A r r i v e s.

We attempt to leave legacies
To be looked upon in history
To be unforgettably
I n c r e d i b l e

To live forever

Forgetting o b l i v i o n is inevitable.

Words that form, have no meaning.
The truth I speak,
Isn't the truth.
Alone in this new life of mine,
Imprisoned in this cage built by my own hands.
The directions are a blur,
As my feet step on thorns.
I lament my fall, I cry out in despair.
A song bereft of word or rhyme.
Falling to oblivion that lures me in,
Promising happiness like a lullaby.
Fallen.
*Promise.

imagine running
but not just running
you're running like something evil is chasing after you
you can hear your heart pounding in your ear
you're running so hard you can't breathe

i've heard that's how it feels to **** yourself
that that's what it feels like to die

adrenaline flowing through your body
faster than light, faster than you're thinking
you feel it numbing your insides into oblivion.

sometimes I still get that feeling

i've heard you feel it pumping in your veins
viciously, like you're about to explode
i acknowledge that i'm screaming
only through my rib cage
you feel it rattling your every bone

i didn't know it would feel that way

like playing an old Nirvana song too loud
and about the person who said
they'd rather hurt than feel nothing at all -
whoever he or she or it is
they obviously didn't know the true bliss

the ecstasy of absolute nothingness.
the calming of feeling, no feeling at all
i've heard that's how it feels
well most of the time anyway
other than that, you are dead...

notes lie crumpled in your hands,
frown split lips spill forth your sobs,
as eyes - soft focus look beyond
the clouding veil of life.
slipping out, the blood red streams
(re) paint the bathroom floor.
thumping from the door makes up
missing beats from your chest:
faltering, looking backwards,
fogging mind grasps childhood wonder
sights and sounds and vivid flow
swimming through the decades past.
final breath amidst the splinters,
showering from the broken door,
distant echoes, growing colder,
time, it hangs, forever more.

An X over my mouth
An X blinded my eyes
An X made me deaf
An X condemned my mind

I can not speak
I can not see
I can not remember
I can not be

Two worlds that will never collide
And a word that will never make it
Outside of thoughts
Into language

And I can not see
I can not say
What's on my mind
What haunts me down

Because of two straight lines
And a ******* X
Blinding my eyes
Putting me into an endless oblivion
Of all that is inside my mind

A ******* letter
And a world overlapping the other
Of nonsense and mirrors
Of reflections and thoughts