I was taught,
To hold my head high,
And laugh when people tried to pull it down,
You put a sword in my hands,
A helmet on my head,
And sent me to slay the dragons knowing that I could,
But even when I came back with my hair all singed,
I came home to a hug,
Because with a teacher like you,
I understood I could be the princess,
And the hero,
I could manoeuvre an axe made of steel,
At the same time as manoeuvring six inch heels,
You sort of wish my art wasn’t always covered in blood,
But I’ll still produce it because you taught me weird is good,
And that it’s okay to be different,
Although you still rescued me,
From several fashion faux pas,
Because I liked to make people laugh,
But we both know the difference between ‘with’ and ‘at’,
You didn’t want me to get hurt,
Tried to stop the inevitable,
But when I did get hit, and I did,
We could pin-point each pin and pull it out,
With ease,
Because they don’t travel far through thick skin,
I got that from you,
I got everything from you,
You taught me to throw rocks at boys,
Because at the end of the day I’d throw rocks at all of them,
There’d just be some that would tolerate it more than others,
Maybe even like it,
After all, you threw rocks at Dad and he married you,
I’ve asked you countless times to get off my back,
Only to discover sometimes you were the only one who had it,
You’re my anchor,
You’re my rock,
The net that constantly catches the,
Whiny,
Moody,
Temperamental trapeze artist,
Who keeps jumping after eighteen years,
Knowing that you’ll stop her from falling on her ****,
When she misses the bar,
There’s so much more I could say,
About things that aren't poetic,
All the hard times and the ugly times and the sad times,
You stopped me from falling off the edge of the world,
By nodding your head,
And understanding,
You’re more than Superman,
Batman,
Wonder woman,
Anyone,
You’re my hero,
Forever and always,

Mum.

My mother you've got value.
More than you know.
My mother you've got strength.
If only that tight grip you'd let go.
My mother you're beautiful.
Like the evening sun.
My mother you've done everything.
It was all you - one.
My mother take it easy we are grown.
kick back and step down from the throne.
My mother you've made this family flourish.
Now watch and put in what you need to nourish.
My mother you worry.
Too much about future and past.
My mother you've done all you can.
We'll not put you last.
My mother we love you.
In our hearts all of the days.
My mother we need you.
All in our own ways.
My mother I wish you happiness
I can't bear to see you sad.
My mother I wish you tranquility.
In life its not worth being mad.
My mother I wish you happy birthday.
I wish you all I can.
My mother you're our everything
A big love from your youngest man.

You're the source of all my anger.
You were the one who was a ****** mother.
You're sad, you're selfish, you drink every night.
Your words of abuse cut like a knife.
You think you're so tough and you don't give a ****.
Then you try to manipulate; well, tough luck.
I'm not falling for the guilt trips; I know your games.
I refuse to speak with you and I feel no shame.
You think you raised me to have respect.
But you were a tyrant who gave nothing but threats.
I remember being frozen with fear.
You'll never apologize because you don't ******* care.
You're never wrong because you're so ******* perfect.
I don't even matter, I'm just a reject.
You were the reason I cut so many times.
But don't worry, I'm doing just fine.
If you don't change soon you'll lose another kid.
But it's not your fault of course, we're easy to rid.
You're a wreck; completely broken.
You don't even remember how to be human.

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder"
Or so they seem to say.
I'm not sure I trust that judgement,
As its pain that grows each day.

Your presence is enough to heal,
To calm and to subdue,
And while we never realised,
We owed this peace to you.

And now your gone for just a few days,
It's all too much to think,
That this is what you've been doing each day,
Without a single blink.

For us to think of you in pain,
We'd wish to take away.
Thinking of your labour pains,
Taking this would never repay.

And all this stress, and all this worry
All of it combined,
Would be nothing compared to your sacrifice,
Because even taking your pain on ourselves now,
Would not come close to the way you gave us life.

*Mum.

There is a woman
Who loves me like air
She gave me life and she continues doing so
One time she told me to please not smoke anymore
But she has found every way of making sure I know
(Bribe, beg and banter, bring me to tears)
Consistent and persistently
That she isn’t happy with how much of me there is
My flesh offends and worries her
She says that she fears for my health
And she wants me to experience my full potential of youthful beauty
She says she thinks I’m beautiful but others may not
Never considering that the opinion I care about most
Is my own
Concern for my outside more than the inner that she can’t see
My lungs that struggle to breathe
My brain that just tries to function
My afflictions inherited from her
She says she only cares for my happiness and well being
In her eyes taking up less space would solve
All of the problems I experience in life
My anxiety disorder
My insecurities I have had as long as I have been self-aware
My emotional detachment and trouble committing
My concerns about being a good person and a valuable friend

Do you think me so superficial, that my happiness rides on my presentation?
Mother please, if you could read my mind
I love myself for who I am
This flesh is matter, and it can change and shift
It is merely my vessel in this world
I wish you could care about the person I am becoming
As much as what that person looks like

This time of year soon comes to pass,
Where once again, we gift and praise,
The one who gave us life itself,
Shaped our thoughts and weaved our ways.
She who bore the fetal flesh,
To feed the hungry nursling so.
Love so deep, that knew no bounds,
Planted seeds that came to grow.
The child, too soon now tall and aged,
Yet in the heart still sweet and new,
Her ***** now a memory passed,
But bones are strong and ties long grew.
Disgruntled teen, a storm of ways!
And yet, foundations last the waves,
Survive the hurt of natures' wrath,
Oh, how the twist of time behaves!
Mature and wise, her work is done,
So on this day we sing our truth,
To hold her high and thank her so,
For precious time and sparkling youth!

But this was not the case for you,
The title held but duty missed,
There was no home of joy and love,
A heart unheld and face unkissed.
Shame fed the soil in place of trust,
The heart was sealed from infants grasp,
Insults hurled and cries unheard,
Where hands should link, a missing clasp.
The whirling growth of ones' own mind,
Insulted deep and made you loathe.
The seed you sewn and path you paved,
Forced then to feed and clean and clothe.

But know this Mother,
I hold no grudge.
For I am now a Mother too.
So have this day,
I thank you still,
And know I am much more than you.

Would it be poetetic to take this blade across my wrist
The silver kissing at my arteries

Would it be romantic
To die because of love
Possessive hands choking me.

Would it be beautiful
To breath my last breath
Leaving behind all those who care.

Or would it be tragic to abondon this world before my time.
Mother and father crying over me.

I suppose I forget what you give me
I suppose I forget what you gave
While the sorrow of lost things is with me
I'll carry your gifts to the grave.

I'm sorry I listen to one word
And suddenly forget the rest,
But believe me, 'I love you.' has been heard,
Believe me, I think you're the best.

Nobody believed me like you did
Even when you made out that you don't
I knew that in you were rapids,
I knew that within you was hope.

So I am myself and your presents
The box 'neath your carrying role
I'll try not to forget that your crescents,
Are just a small part of your whole.