Three days in,
And I must admit,
It's getting better,
Like they said it would.
However,
I have been using everything,
I have,
To keep that feeling of you,
Close to me.
Your clothes,
They still reek of you,
And the laundry soap your mother uses.
I keep the stuffed giraffe we won,
At the county fair,
On my night stand to remind me,
That you're coming home.
And I haven't yet washed my face,
I really know I ought to,
But your kiss is still on my cheek,
And I don't want to lose it.
All of our friends,
They've kept me company,
So I don't panic,
When your name doesn't pop up on my phone.
I check that **** thing so often,
You'd think I would stop,
But ******* it,
I'm hoping I'll wake up,
And none of this had happened.

I couldn't breathe,
As I laid in a ball,
On my twin size bed,
Curled up on the side,
You used to lay on.
"Babygirl, don't cry."
You said all the time.
But saying that,
Would be the same,
As if I asked you not to go.
Both of which inevitable.

I’m sick and tired of people rabbiting on a load of ****
About their ******* duty and fighting for freedom
For the fat ugly patriotic selfish folks "back home"
And pathetic ****** neo-fascist ******* like that
And gabbling on a load of sentimental horsedung
About giving their all for their ******* useless country
When honestly they’d rather be at home in some ugly provincial hick town
Patting their nasty mongrel dogs and groping their neighbours’ wives' arses
And eating mumsy-wumsy’s over-cooked meat and stodgy apple pie
Whilst ensconced on the sofa watching sodding Celebrity Big Brother.

How can a soldier nowadays say he didn't want to be there?
Are people so ******* thick or blind or moronic not to realise
A person volunteers to be in the armed forces in most countries nowadays?
There’s no ****** press gangs or ****** conscription any more;
People become soldiers because they choose to do so
(exceptions include filthy neo-**** ****-holes like Israel
where the young men queue up to **** Palestinian babies for fun) .

Therefore soldiers DO want to fight, they DO want the chance to ****
And they willingly risk their own ugly unwashed redneck necks.
So they have no right to whine and bellyache when they get asked
To earn their daily state-paid bread and do a spot of killing
Instead of sitting on their overweight arses at MY expense.
Or course, they could show some real guts and resign instead,
But what the ****, why pass up on a chance to do some
Legalised ****** and get paid handsomely at the same time.

Just in case you think I forgot, I am totally and fully aware
That 'he' includes 'she' in this context now that women
Have an equal chance to have their military buns blown off pointlessly.
So don't whinge or expect sympathy when your body parts come home in a bag.
Personally, I am of the belief that the only good soldier is a dead soldier,
And the more the merrier. RIP military thugs and up yours.

They're telling us of dreadful acts
of ******, **** and pillage,
countless callous brutal facts,
defenceless desperate rage.

And so our allies intervene
to tear away the tyrants
and leave a gap for votes to fill
from those who live and have the will.

But many die from friendly fire
lit by furious righteous rage
while canny men conspire to score,
see headlines on the city page.

I've watched enough military movies to know that, time is the most valuable asset.
One day, you're swapping bullets and the next day, you're drowning in them.
I know that every time you pick up a gun, you're holding death.
I know that every bullet is a phone call to home from your commanding officer telling your family how outstanding your service to your country has been.

Every soldier, every partner is a life on its own.
Every man for themselves because when I get killed, we can't swap places so instead we swap stories of our life cause we know that soon it's going to end.
Every mission is a doorway to a head shot, so you use your head so you don't get shot.
You assume position in the safest place only to be found by a ****** that marks you with a laser the same color as your blood, so there's no surprise when this ****** takes you out.

You served well, soldier. But your battle is over.

I never knew,
I never knew that it would take me 7 months after he left to realize that I miss him.
I never knew how much I love my brother until 7 months after he left for boot camp.
I never knew how much you could miss someone until 7 months and 1 day after he left.
I never knew how time goes so slow until 7 months and 2 days after he left.
I never knew how I could miss the time where he would punch me and call me baby every time I said ow until 7 months and 3 days after he left.
I never knew how I could regret the times I said I hated him over the dumbest things after he left.
I never knew how pain would be the first thing on my mind when I woke after he left.
I never knew that maybe I would never see him again until 7 months and 4 days after he left.
I never knew that I might never get the chance to listen to his terrible irish music and get ice cream with him after he left.
I never knew that it would be weeks until I got to hear his voice.
I never knew that I would look up into the stands and not see him.
I never knew how much it would hurt to not get the chance to hug him after a bad day.
I never knew how much he loved me.
I never knew until now… and now is too late.

My hand is more comfortable as a fist on someones jaw than intertwined in somebody else's hand
My body trembles from the sound of your voice drifting to me, but is stone cold from the sounds and blasts from gunfire.
My mind tells me that I have a higher chance of getting wounded from love than I do from a battlefield.

I can run for miles,
My reaction time is flawless,
My aim with a gun is accurate;
But I cannot fight.

I have national pride,
A desire to defend my people,
A survivors instinct;
But I cannot fight.

I am young enough to join,
Old enough to know discipline,
Old enough to be mature;
But I cannot fight.

Being deaf kinda ***** sometimes.