your music -both of your music is resounding,
as i try to make my words beautiful
when all the while they’ve just been readable.
you pile small words into loving strings and blocks,
you put music in my ears and show me
that which brings you joy.
do i bring you joy?
i want to bring you basket-fulls of it.

you are not what i should allow -i cannot allow you to reside in these corners of my mind,
which are supposed to hold the tall tanned forms of men and the awkward and gangly boys
who play in the schoolyard.
they’ve run off to shoot their basketballs, tap their thumbs against their screens,
really i don’t need them to feel soft butterflies in my stomach,
they’ll never have the incandescent butterflies in me for their own,
they can’t deserve it.

these uneven strands, like paper beads in front of the pale moon,
glowing above the waters of a small village,
are heartfelt and wonderful,
like the declarations i imagine are given there,
where the rest of the world meets the scintillating fireflies and slow dreams on slow river canoes.
can you imagine us, if our brains were not so worried about soaring ahead -if we had time to experience those in-between moments that allowed us to fall in love?

but we have no in-between moments,
even though i delude myself every night, dreaming of a day when i put my pencil down,
and allow myself see you -sitting next to me while eating, your warm voice on the phone laughing softly in my ear,
you laying next to me while watching the stars -ever distant as always,
just as much of a mystery to me as the map of the night sky and it’s burning stars, spinning clouds,
and utter cold.

each delusion has become a beautiful memory, a twisting mystery.
a soft touch to the face, brushes of hands. could you be in love,
or was it just that i was your favorite girl -today? or were you brave?
do you miss me? my large eyes want to drink you up, and allow myself to imagine us,
doing more than brushing hands and painting each other’s faces over and over and over again,
until we’ve made masterpieces out of words and feather-light wanting.

If letters on a keyboard are building blocks,
I want to build the most beautiful masterpiece.
Fitting different letters together into words,
And words into sentences.
I want these sentences to deliver thoughts that will make people's lives better.

Stained Glass
We all have a story to tell.
We can stand alone or become part of a bigger picture together.
We come in different shapes and sizes.
We are all part of a kaleidoscope of various colors like individual gems.
We are each unique but we can band together and become part of a masterpiece.
Some of us maybe smoother than others.
Some of us maybe a little bit jaded.
Some of us may have more lines than others.
While some of us are shapelier than others.
We can choose to shine alone or shine together like precious gems to become a masterpiece of stained glass if we join together and let the light shine through us.
Let your light shine.

If you forget to realize your God's master, you'll settle for being someone's side piece.      
                                           -Kada

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.

i haven't been able to write as much since you came back in my life
what little i have written, it's been about you
i think the reason why is due to the fact
that the only art i care about anymore is sitting right in front of me
nothing i create or think up, even on a really good day
could ever be as breathtaking as you
i'm trying to figure out what i can do because your all i seem to think about
and i don't even want to try writing about you
because then i will be going on for centuries
and never be done talking about how wonderful you are
don't even get me started on how i feel about you
that would be an endless cycle of me stating how in love with you i am
i'm trying to figure out what to do
because i'm always thinking about you and craving your attention
and i don't know how to express how spectacular you are
or how sincere i'm being when i tell you i adore you
i know none of my writing for you will ever me a masterpiece
but hopefully one of these days, you will see how i love you so