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Jess McCullers Mar 2021
Too worried about your masculinity
You won’t open your eyes
I’m trying to get better
Does it scare you?
I’m trying to show you
If you just let me
We can do it together
Otherwise
It will just be me
I wanted it to be we though
blondespells Jan 2021
Meanings of masculinity
Do you beat a woman until she’s raw?
Do you pound her brain until she bleeds?
Do you take her home and hold her when you’re through?

In your apology for disrupting my development
You told me I would never be enough
I traced the corners of the ceiling with my eyes
Five, or maybe six times that night

Meanings of masculinity
Do you search for open wounds?
Do you **** her poison sweetly?
Do you send her home and leave her when you’re through?

Memorizing triangles of sanity
Forgetting the man who bruised me
Knowing I would have to stand up again
A fallen angel who was once a saint

In question of

Meanings of masculinity
Do you feel the same way I do?
Do you drink the open air?
Do you go home feeling broken and tired when you’re through?
Grey Rose Nov 2020
Tell me
That gun that you're so proud of
Why does it tremble so much?
Is your hand following your unstable mind?
Is that the same hand that holds your child's?

Your emotions
Fragile enough to be crushed with a hug
Insecure enough to attack a compliment
Corrupt enough to endlessly reload on lies and deceit
Are those the same emotions you shoot into your wife at night?

Your bullets roar so loudly
What voices are you trying to drown out?
Your heartbeat clanks at the speed of the fallen shells
What are you so afraid of?
A man armed and ready to go off at any moment like you?

Tell me
What can you manage to defeat?
With those trembling hands
Uncertain of what to take aim at
You shoot down anything that moves
Uncertain of where the trigger is
You pull at anything you can reach
Uncertain of how much enemies are left
You forever stay in the trenches
I now know that when you bow your head at church that it's not for prayer

Then hoping to nullify your senseless you refuse to leave the battlefield
And take no-mans-land everywhere you go

You wear your bulletproof vest and rifle to the supermarkets, schools, offices, dinner tables, churches, and funerals

Forever firing
Forever charging
Forever defending
Forever fighting
Yourself.
mark soltero Nov 2020
im starting to realize
i don’t eat
im afraid to chew
scared to gain more than an ounce
i thought this fear died
when the hate did
but when you’re gone
i don’t want to fight these pangs
giving in to their tiresome lull
maybe one day i can be as small as i feel
but that’s not the truth
i just want to feel like a man
longed for and strong
instilling fear in those who challenge me
until then i might eat
even more so in hopes that maybe
i can tear open my insides
to become beautiful on the outside
TRIGGER WARNING PLS DONT DONT DONT DONT DONT THINK THAT HAVING AN ED IS GLAMOROUS I AM IN RECOVERY FOR OVER A YEAR AND DO NOT SUPPORT OR ENCOURAGE ANYONE TO HAVE OR PRACTICE HAVING DISORDERED EATING
mark soltero Nov 2020
i  am not a man
***** made at best with a lack of quality control
i cry shamefully
waiting for the day
to find that my heart has officially grown cold
like all the good boys
that receive their praise
what id give not to ask
but to only receive
just for one moment
i want to feel
what it feels like to be treated like necessity
and not a burden
i long for everything that will never be mine
Just Grace Aug 2020
take sips sip sips
tumble down the flowers
bundled in white towels at
my rose hips
from raised graves
velvet hearse
sandstone paves
push away stones along way

soothe
change patterns
surprise
break the consonance
act-like defiance
it's harder than we thought
hurry
get back to the tower
don't choke on the pink powder
before I get there

complex lush
doesn't need any soldiers
off horse, of course
only I reside in these gardens
part my own lawns to my great gates
a dosed beast waits
and I must return
based off of a dream
Jayanta Jul 2020
Vagueness encircled
Fragmented aspiration!
Vagueness crafted
Fadeout the dream of living!
Vagueness designed
Slaughter the humanity!
Vagueness contrived
Maneuver division!
Vagueness persuaded
Project masculinity!
Vagueness indorsed
Homicide creation.
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