The battlefield was here, where these cattle graze
The cavalry and Comanche fought the better part of a day
Guns against arrows, savages against the savagery, they were out-drawn
Braves against the bullets, so helpless their plight
Defending their land and families
Maybe they were right
Now, it’s just a valley
The way it was back then
The day before that massacre of forty honest Indians
This is their memorial
This bright day above
A view that lasts for miles
The many trees and shrubs
And the wild flowers
That grow between the rocks
Their maidens wore them in their braids
Before their loves were lost.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be
Neither am I
Bewildered I am at how it turned out this way
Dreams and reality have to coexist
So they say
Unfortunately
That's the truth today

You see me and Casey had a good thing going
We were more than compatible
This was a love incomparable
We held hands, kissed on the street
We were happy, it was neat

This is the part where I get hurt
One day it was over, all in a blur
Something about us not being right
She moved out of the house and into the night

I'm not big on introspection
Now, I've no choice
I'm at the intersection
Of dreams and reality
With love somewhere in the middle
In search of a compass
Pointing to where I need to be

You left me with all these memories
The way you stir your coffee
That eyebrow you would raise
Your quiet confidence
Your understated
Elegant style
Your knowing ways
You had me at hello
And now at goodbye
Always and still you amaze

I'm a better man for loving you
A sadder man for losing you
I'm not going through a phase
Just reminiscing, maybe convincing myself
That I'm gonna be OK

Dreams come in two varieties
Those of tomorrow or the other
For me, for us, there is only the past
Why I dream only of yesterday
I have no choice
It just turned out that way

I can almost touch you at times
But when I try, you turn away

Memories of you linger and flicker
Over the sands of the time
In wonder I treasure those times together
When the feeling was sublime
You may be gone but not the thought
Of the love that once we knew
So when I pause to remember
In all candor, the thought of you renews
Good wishes I send — that’s all I can do
To the one in the end who loved me so true
For which I shall ever give thanks
Dearest one, I’ll think of you
At the setting of my sun
For once a upon a time
Love was all we knew
The glory of me and you
In the time when we were one

We could touch the wind
We did so every day
Around the world of love
So it was we sailed
Aloft with inspiration
And plans that we would make
It was everything about her
That made my body shake with exhilaration
Oh, we were the bomb
Riding high with hope
Then one day it was gone

These days when I feel a gust
I often think of her
Such a beauty, what a heart
That ensures and endures
Still a part of me
Always shall it stay
Wherever I go
And whenever the wind does play

Neville Johnson Nov 2016

That ship has sailed
I'm not on it
Our glorious romance
Now a sad sonnet
Our ship has sailed
We are not in it

We tried, but I won't say we failed
Forever I know I will regale
Myself with the thoughts of time so well-spent
Lost in each other wherever we went

The wind in the willows whispers your name
Whenever I walk down Memory Lane
I see our reflection in the lovers who hold
Their hands tight together
It's soul to soul

That was us, what we used to be
But our ship has sailed to its destiny
The sea of romance, the ocean of sighs
It was good while it lasted
We both realize

Neville Johnson Oct 2016

There are moments I remember
Places I have been, people I have met
And then there is the one
Who captured my heart and never let it go
So long ago, yet still so near to me today
Love as the enigma that forever stays
As life goes on, time stands still
Our fates entwined in a
Lost yet lasting love, consigned
To forever remembering and
Embracing the past
Forever together
Forever apart
Never to be reconciled
The hurting heart
Moving on
Still looking back
Caught between yesterday and tomorrow
With today in the way
Yes, I wonder what would have happened
But I know I'll never know
And if I did, I would not say

Kelsey Austere Jul 2016

I used to write about you so intensely, so determined that everything I said would somehow reach you and the ink would spill in your veins.  I used to write about you with a pinched heart, an ache that never left my bones, and a crystal tear in each eye that never wanted to stroll down my cheeks. I used to write about you, hoping that the missing-you feeling would pass and that the visions in my head would be diminished if I just fucking wrote down how I felt.

We were partners in crime. We were our own Bonny & Clyde, but you decided to get away with Billie Jean. My hair is falling out and the tears are streaming like blood down a pure river. I flushed my rosary, the one you gave to me, down the toilet and now the toilet’s clogged and I don’t want to get out of bed to fix it. I don’t even want to call your brother plumber, but maybe I will and maybe I’ll screw him and leave lipstick kisses on the places I would leave them on you.

I feel so sick when I get in this cycle, when I start writing about you again and when everything just spills out of the glass. But I still write about you because the therapist tells me to.

© Kelsey Austere, 2016
Tony Andrews Feb 2016

There was once a time when I believed that love was always sunshine and rainbows, but as the years quickly passed me by I came to realise that this was not always the case, love unrequited can be a venomous Snake watching patiently from the shadows in bloody desperation, waiting to spring open-mouthed and sink its serpent like teeth straight into your heart with no intentions of ever releasing its vice like grip.

Love can leave its sting strong than any Wasp, repetitively and twice as sharp, the pain unbearable, making you sob like an anguished infant into your pillow, as you cast your desperate mind on how it once was with her presence in your life, struggling to come to terms with the fact that nothing is the same, everything is different, feeling more isolated than you had ever thought possible, prolonged despair sinking in.

You thought that your love meant something to her; perhaps it did once upon a time, she had become your blanket of security, your hopes and dreams all featured her, now you come to realise that it meant nothing, those false promises and broken dreams, she had never had any intentions of keeping, how could you let yourself be so foolish!

You find yourself thinking about her from time to time, wondering what could have been, as you sink back into your bed, sick to the stomach at the thought of her being out there somewhere with someone else, happy, possibly laughing at the memories that you had formed together, or perhaps worse, forgetting that you had ever existed in her life at all.

Sometimes, when the lonely nights set in you find yourself crying yourself to sleep, unable to shake her from your dreams, that smile you once thought of as pure and angelic, now laughing at your despair, sometimes a certain song plays on the radio which reminds you of her, as your heart fills with such pain, you wonder whether you can make it through another day of love unrequited.

I don't want to listen to old voicemails over and over, taking me back to the damage I did and the distance I drew, listening to you love me so much, until you couldn't. Reminding me of my sick satisfaction as I drove you away just to know I'd be fine without you. And you moved on, long forgot about me. It's a year later and your recorded voice cripples me with a crave for closure I'll never get. But, still I listen to that voicemail out of the same sick satisfaction I get from pushing limits before it becomes self-destruction.

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