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William A Poppen Oct 2019
An exercise in line breaks.  See below

Give me notice (Version One)

Give me notice
For life is short
I might have more to do
Than rest on your doorstep
Hoping you will open the latch
Greet me with a smile
Suggest we spend the day
Viewing the community pond
Feeding the ducks
Cementing our bond

Give me notice
So I will not
Fall in love alone

Give Me Notice (Version Two)

GIVE ME NOTICE

Give me notice
Life
can be short

I might have
more to do

Than rest
on your doorstep

Hoping
you will
open the latch

Greet me
with a smile

Suggest we
spend the day

By the village pond

Feeding
the ducks

Cementing
our bond

Give me
notice

So I
will not
fall in love
alone
Line breaks can change a poem.  Borrowing from an idea of Sandford Lyne in his book Writing Poetry from the Inside Out, I tried changing the line breaks in one of my poems.  Here are the two poems.  The top one was my first write and it was posted here before Nov, 2018.  The second  rendering is unchanged except for line breaks.  I would appreciate any feedback of the poems.  Someone read them and suggested a different title.  What do you think about the title or the versions?  Please let me know.  There is one change in wording, community pond to village pond and an additional and in the original post.
ConnectHook Oct 2015
I wonder sometimes
why droll observations;
recollections of a personal and
sometimes confessional nature,
(interesting enough in themselves – if well-written),
get called “poems” when broken up by
weird line spacing. Nothing against
descriptive prose –
but I don’t think it is truly
Poetry. You can call it that
if you want; I don’t
mind.

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