You’re not fully healed
but you’re not still broken.
With every passing sunrise,
your soul earns another token.
You choose to keep going
when all you wanted was to quit,
and look how far you’ve come
from when your heart was severely split.
The light at the end of
your tunnel gets brighter every day.
Thank you for putting down the pills,
the knife, or the gun and choosing to stay.
Shout out to everyone who chose to keep fighting those inner demons.
There is this innocence we have as children.
This fundamental right
to believe in a world where anything is possible.
That our daddy's can scare away any boogeyman,
Hiding under our beds or in our closets.
That the world is full of possibilities,
and there is endless time
covered in romantic notions.
But as adults we are no longer fundamentally innocent.
We are patchworks.
Taped in some spots that come lose all the time.
And sewn together in other spots,
That don't come undone all so often.
But we are broken and glued back together,
more often then even we are willing to admit to ourselves.
We harbor resentment and bias,
creating our own worlds in which the boogeyman
and not a soul can save us from him.
The part of us that was so eager,
The part of us that believed in a world of endless possibility
Withers and rots.
Leaving just the acidic taste of lack luster life.
Endless, monotonous daily tasks.
Craving the days when the world didn't feel like
The inside of stove with the pilot burning but out.
We are no longer the innocent.
We are the patchwork creation of a life,
That hasn't always been forgiving.
We are what our children think can save them from anything.
We are the boogeyman killer
The demon vanquisher.
Patchwork and all we may not be innocent,
But we are strong.
a symbol of hope.
a semicolon represents a sentence the author could have ended but chose not to.
- things will get better, they have to
All my life I’ve been told I’m nothing but a disappointment.
A waste of human creation.
“You’re useless,” they’d tell me.
“You’re a nobody.”
For the longest time, I believed them.
After awhile their voices became my own voice.
The voice inside my head.
Those voices have started to drown.
I’m grown up now.
I’ve realized my victories outweigh my failures.
Even though I’m still battling it, I’ve “won” against depression.
I was ***** & abused.
But I’m stronger.
I’ve came face to face to a dog that tried mauling me to death.
I was unmarried and pregnant.
I was a single mom.
I lost my mom to cancer.
All battles and life events I should have failed at.
I’M STILL ALIVE
To dear God whom I confess
But which whom I cannot assess
In which I do not know if I should regret
That I am monster born and not beget
I do not feel guilty as I make child cry
My heart feels empty while my face is dry
I feel nothing when parting ways
With friends and families, even dearly dead
But if I am such a monster, why do I bother
To long for love of my mother, my sisters and my father?
Which I will never receive in a blue moon
But will crave as sunshine in the afternoon
I sit here waiting my impending doom
Filled with wild thought alone in my room:
Why do I feel loneliness and fear
In loveless world I continue to tear
And only place to confess my truth
Is in a place and space of a booth
Where my face hides away from the eyes
Which I must continue to deny
As I am the shadow that hides from light
But until the end, I will fight for flight
As I wish to be free from such thought
While I lay shivering tight as rope has wrought
Deadly cells find comfort in my body
They grow and destroy my mind
inside I slowly die, my soul turns into a graveyard
this pain robs me of energy
cancer oh how I hate what you have done to me
you infect me with agony that spreads like the ocean
touching every corner of my body
leaving me to fight this pain
which makes me feel deserted in a world full of many
Inside its cold and lonely, outside feels so empty
I fought you for years, gave you so many tears
as you flirted with my fears
cancer what do you want from me
if it is my life you seek, my life you won't get
for that I will fight till the end of time
I will not give up, for I am a survivor
I was born to be stronger, hold on longer
Fight this battle with the love I get from others
Cancer I will overcome you one way or another
for I am a survivor
This piece was written for a co-worker of mine, to help her get through her battle with cancer. Thank you all for the support and reaching out to me.
Why is it we fight for only that which affects us?
You see, we are all in this grand scheme singing a grand chorus.
I can't begin to fathom the depths of the hatred in some souls.
To hate somebody with every fiber of your being without actually knowing them, as if you've walked a day in their soles.
1 in 12 trans humans are killed in a violent fashion.
1 in 8 if their skin color is of the colored version.
You don't know a single thing about the fight these strong beings undergo.
And you know even less about the thoughts they can't show.
It's embedded in us to root for the underdog in a contest.
But imagine an empty corner even though they're the best.
Imagine the feelings felt from former friends.
Imagine their bitter ends.
"It's just morally wrong..."
Can't you understand they've felt this way all along?
I think it's beautiful to embrace the inner workings of our mind.
It is not weakness to be one of a kind.
Never feel you are alone.
There are 7 billion people on this planet and we all have a light that's meant to be shown.
Our looks do not define us.
We are celestial beings formed from scattered stardust.
If you don't think that's beautiful, then I feel sorry for you.
I feel sorry that your perspective of beauty is so detrimentally blue.
Look at the world and its colors in full.
Never believe you are not beautiful.