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Monica Alvarez Jun 2018
I’m tired of being tired
And instead of resting,
I decided to hide.

I’m tired of explaining
That the world isn’t just you and me,
That the earth keeps on spinning
And I’m pinned on a place I never wished to be.

I’m tired of crying,
Sleepless nights, and swollen eyes.
The eyes that turned red in the morning
Because the whole night I’ve been trying to live.

I’m tired of smiling,
When every piece inside me is breaking.
When all I wanted to do is to explode,
Yet all I do is just nod.

I’m tired of saying “I’m fine”
When in fact I am not
But you still believe me
Because you’re too blinded to see.

I’m tired of typing words—
Words you’re not worth to see;
Words you never heard from me,
Words that I meant to keep.

I’m tired of staying
And every night I thought of leaving
But then I imagined you alone
And then I walk back to my bed wishing I’d drowned.

I’m tired of pretending—
Saying I never loved you
When the truth is I really do.
And it hurts so much too

Because no matter what I say,
No matter what I do
All you can see
Are the things I never meant to do.

Above everything else…

I’m tired of being tired
And I bet you have no idea
How many times
I already died.
Caitlyn Morton Apr 2015
For those that are "just tired" and
have nothing to look
forward to:
there's someone out there
that will fill the hole in your broken
you just have to find them.
this is for those that think that
scarring their skin is more beautiful
than the world we live in.
for those that lost their virginity,
like me, at age 15, on a cold bed, with
someone who has even colder eyes.
someone that had no right to take
something so precious- so valuable-
away from us.
someone you thought you knew
so well, but at that very moment, he
turned into a complete stranger.
this is for those who spend every
waking moment, romanticizing about
suicide, constantly thinking about when they're
going to try again.

"I love you. I support you. You are important.
Live. Smile" :)
March 30, 2015

— The End —