Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Brycical Feb 2015
For Achievement in Editing:
-Julie Williams of the Jefferson County School Board for her attempting to change the AP US History curriculum so that it "should not encourage or condone civil disorder, social strife or disregard of the law [while] instructional materials should present positive aspects of the United States and its heritage."

-Dan Fisher and the "Black Robe Regiment" for their work in banning AP US History in Oklahoma because it "fails to teach American Exceptionalism," whatever the **** that means.

-Creation Museum of Kentucky for their work in "[Bringing] the pages of the Bible to life, casting its characters and animals in dynamic form and placing them in familiar settings. Adam and Eve live in the Garden of Eden. Children play and dinosaurs roam near Eden’s Rivers," because everyone remembers where dinosaurs are mentioned in the bible.

For Achievements in Adapted Screenplay:

-People complaining against #blacklivesmatter and #icantbrethe protests with old tropes like, "How are people supposed to go shopping during the holidays?" or "This is just too inconvenient."

-All the liberals who champion free speech and all the conservatives who want to "stick it to terrorists" yet most if not all of them for not showing any of the Charlie Hedbo cartoons.

-All the political parties, including conservatives and liberals who haven't updated their perception of the world or their talking points beyond 1980's yet sill trot out their gibbligarsh like it's not a polished slice of *******.

For Achievement in Acting, Actress:

-Camille Cosby, wife of now infamous Bill Cosby for at first saying nothing then later defending her husband about the 'alleged' ****** assault allegations by 37 different women (or whatever the number is up to now).

-My mom for pretending to listen whenever I propose solutions to her various anxieties.

-Hillary Clinton for not tearing out the beating heart of her husband or anyone who asks about her husband, even though she probably really wants to but at the same time makes you wonder why she just doesn't divorce the horn dog anyway.

For Achievement in Acting, Actor:**

-McDonald's (because corporations are people) for their work in getting excited that they supposedly serve real food and making patronizing adverts about loving their consumers while they are currently battling seven lawsuits alleging "wage theft, failure to pay overtime and alteration of time records."  

-For White Guys who continue to go along with the idea that there is nothing wrong with the current Justice System.

- Robin Williams because I'm pretty sure he would have been voted least likely to commit suicide by the general public at large.

-An Uncle of mine who continues to joke around and play nice with everyone despite the fact there's a mountain of evidence suggesting he's verbally and/or physically abused his wife and kids routinely.

STILL TO COME LATER IN THE SHOW, BEST DIRECTOR & PICTURE NOMINEES .

— The End —