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JL Nov 2020
Here I am,
Just me
And the sun,
As it be
Shining on.
And finding me
On the beach,
Where we
Have come
To see
A little
That the breeze
And spray
Play on the beach.
I find me
Seeing the reach,
Of wide expanse
Where I am me
And the world is
As it should be.
Hilary Oct 2020
Am I just a party girl,
Who makes a party really swell?
I laugh and talk to everyone,
And afterwards I feel so loved,
With compliments flowing thick and fast.
What a nice person isn’t she?
She listens and questions and has a conversation be it serious or funny she’s great in any situation.

But they don’t know the real me,
The me who seeks the adoration,
To give me feelings of validation.
For party girl is sure to impress
But would you still like me when I’m not at my best.

There’s more to me than meets the eye,
Vulnerable, human and prone to cry.
I put my mask on for the party coz that’s the me I created. Full of laughter, full of charm.
It’s done me well making friends so far.
But are they just faux amis,
Or are they really there for me?

Cant they tell it’s all an act?
The laughs, the touches, the dancing,
The drinking?
It’s there as my shield to stop anyone thinking, that I am lost and just want love.

I don’t want to be labelled party girl,
I want them to know that I am swell without the party, don’t you see? I’m a great person just as me.

Party girl is like a magnet,
People drawn to me like bees
But when a guy labels me as a party girl,
They never want to see my other sides,
My smart brain and my passion for life.
They only want the party girl who brings the party and makes it swell.

No one wants the party girl to get to know and build a life, a family and grow old slow.
They just want me to be the charming party goer who lights up the room and calls everyone darling.

I need a guy who likes to party, who loves to talk and laugh and dance.
A guy who’s willing to give me a chance. To get to know my other sides and love me fully bursting with pride.
A guy who loves a party girl and together they make the party swell.
starstrike Jan 2020
Deep within
under the flesh of this vessel
beneath the sinew and muscle
bone and marrow
she stirs.
I can feel her
and I must coax her out with familiarity.
So into the depths I go


to find her
to find myself
oh daughter of smoke and nightmares.
WC Wrights Nov 2019
Little screens often determine whole destinies
people, places, personal items
all graded together on virtual papers
no one ever passes or gets high marks

Faceless denizens of actual realities
unidentified, but still vocal
leaving words of anger in their wake
all over others journals of life

One person breathes in and out
walking, running, sleeping
eating, even laughing sometimes
looking at the sky and smiling to themselves
Who's in control of your life?
Saloni mann Sep 2019
My therapist once told me that-" You are lucky, because you are aware of your problems. You know where you stand and what is troubling you. You also have the ability to explain what Haunted you last night and that is difficult. You also seem aware about what you want out of your life. Your idea of an end result maybe blurred but you are aware of it. "
I sometimes wonder that Most people do not even know what is killing them constantly but they are still living their life. Most people are unaware of their thoughts and what these thoughts mean to them . It takes them their whole life to realise that this is a problem they need to get rid of. It takes them their whole life to understand that this is creating an unhealthy pattern and they are falling prey to it with each passing day.

She also explained that-" The biggest problem you face is walking and acting on the path in between. You mess up in between and lose a sense of the beginning as well as the end. You mess up and panic and lose yourself."
It's so weird that we know that we will have to walk down a road to reach somewhere but our visions are so fainted and blurred that the answers to basic questions are far fetched.
We are often surrounded by several Questions like;
which road to walk upon?
What direction to choose on the road?
Whether to follow the busy road or the road less taken?
What is my destination?
Do I even want to walk right now or just relax and put myself back together?
Do I really want to walk upon this road?
Am I choosing a life I always wanted to live?
Am I ready to accept all the hardships that are coming  my way?
Would I be content and satisfied after giving my all to something?
It's okay to not know the answer of each and every question that comes your way, it's okay to not be able to choose a direction for yourself and decide whether you will be content with it or not.
But it is always important to come in contact with your inner conscience and make yourself aware about you.
It is important to understand your problems and help yourself understand that you are required to eliminate them because they may **** you. Self acceptance is difficult but it is the best gift you give yourself.
Kelly O'Toole May 2019
I tiptoe across the floor,
I sway side to side.
I like to feel different textures, but some they make me cry.
I'm also a fussy eater, my beans can't touch my egg.
And god help you if you think I'm eating all that veg.
Bath time can be stressful,
I don't like water on my head.
It makes me feel weird and gives me a shear dread.
I know what's coming next,
The comb to my head.
I don't like the prickles, they feel just like the trickles.
The towel may be warm, but it irritates my skin.
The clothes are nice and bright but they just feel too tight.
My socks are never right,
My shoes rub off my skin.
The light flickers and the walls are caving in.
The music is thumping.
My head is pounding.
My mind is racing.
I feel agitated.
Panic has set in.
And my heart it is throbbing.
The humming of the oven,
The wish wash of the machine.
The dripping of the tap,
The whistle of the birds.
The bark of the dogs,
The cries of the baby.
The whispering of the walls.
I need my safe space.
I need to calm down.
I may self soothe as your touch could feel crude.
My emotions are overwhelming.
I can feel all the tears, it's like I'm drowning, so please stay near.
I try to do good, but I get frustrated.
No one sees my struggle, because I don't know how to say it.
I'm like a ticking bomb, ready to unleash thunder.
I scream, I roar, I hit, I kick.
I bite with all my might.
But I am in fright.
It's from the fight or flight.
But I am a gentle being,
Misunderstood it seems.
I might not like my toys,
But you bring me so much joy.
My eyes appear glazed and I may seem like I'm in a daze.
And though I might not say it, I love you in many ways.
DeAnn Mar 2018
I am afraid of letting go
And losing control

I am afraid of being happy
Of waking up wanting to start the day
Of accepting myself for who I am
Of losing the motivation for my art because I’m no longer so sad and alone
Of losing the bubble I created for writing since I have no one to turn to
no one to talk to
no one to belong to

I am afraid of being

I am afraid of the potential I possess
I don’t mean to sound arrogant or proud
Because I’m not

I am just me


I walk around the halls sheltered and afraid
Afraid of the people I see around me
Every one of these individuals has a hidden talent,
A secret,
A love, A vice,

And what do I have?
Just me.

Mikayla DeAnn.

If I am not walking with a false bravado
Shining plastered smiles to hide my fear
I am invisible
I am shoved

Mikayla DeAnn Kay

I am afraid of letting go
If I let go, I am letting go of the control I possess,
My only vice
I am letting go of the years of “you’re not good enough”
The years of “you’re not pretty enough”
The years of “you’re not skinny enough”
The years of “you’re not worthy”
The years of “you do not belong”

Mikayla DeAnn

I want to shine
I want to smile
I want to make others happy without losing pieces of myself
I want to be confident in what I like
What I wear
What I desire
I want to feel whole
I want to be seen

I want to become… no

I am

No body Feb 2018
I know, you want me to be perfect
But I don't what to be perfect
Do you want to know why
Because I am me
I am who I am
I am not perfect
I am not who you want me to be
Just wish you would understand
Rae Lynn Sopper Dec 2017
Pretty, ugly, smart, stupid, ****, loser, criminal, black, white, perfect, wrong, addict, outcast, normal, and freak.
What does it matter?
We use stereotypes to classify each other,
To separate ourselves into different groups.
I remember when I was young that I was never in dresses, skirts, or nail polish, and I didn't like pink.
I was treated as one of the guys, and that was how I liked it.
Then I got into school, where I was told I was wrong.
I was supposed to wear skirts, I was supposed to love dresses, and I was supposed to like pink.
I became a freak, an outcast because I didn't.
They categorized me,
I became nothing more than a title, as did everyone else who walked through the door.
We live life and whether we like it or not,
When we see someone we mentally sort them and tell them who they are supposed to be.
And heaven forbid they don't fit where they should.
Because if they don't they suddenly, become nothing more than jagged puzzle pieces,
So jagged that they don't fit anywhere and shouldn't be allowed to.
Yet here I am, proud to be jagged, and proud to be wrong,
Proud to stand out.
My mom does more than worship her man,
Is she wrong?
My uncle is a police officer,
Does he brutalize?
My Aunt likes wine,
Is she a drunk?
And I don't like pink,
Am I a freak?
We go through life being told how to live.
Follow the trends,
Have the prettiest friends.
Don't talk about the things that you've battled,
And don't let them see you're rattled.
You need to wear this and eat that,
And did you see her god she's so fat!
Be more like her,
And fall in love with him.
Because if you don't your chances are slim.
If you're not like them you don't matter,
Because we have been stamped with our peers' opinions.
We've been told time and time again to reshape ourselves.
Too bad that our time has passed to change the world,
But have no fear for we still have time to change ourselves.
Be pretty,
Wear pink,
Like this dress,
Follow this sport,
Wear these shoes,
Live here,
Shop there,
But what if I don't want to?
I am who I am and I'm happy this way!
Isn't that enough for you?
No, it can't be, because I don't have the right to be just me.
I don't have the power to decide!
She'll say be taller,
I'll have to.
He'll say be smaller,
I'll have to.
They'll say be quieter,
I will have to.
I will say be louder,
And I can't.
Because I am a freak.
Because I don't like pink.
TS Apr 2017
Finding yourself in life is an amazing feat. Not all people find themselves in their early twenties, most go to the grave without finding themselves. It is a disgusting reaction of hatred, jealousy, and arrogance that people show when you find yourself. To think that I am the happiest I can be and yet society continues to tell me what's wrong with me. What's wrong with me is YOU.
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