If you really love me, you'd trust me
Wouldn't you?

I say you need to sleep
When I'm too scared to close my eyes and try

I say you can be strong
When later I fall on the ground, too weak to stand

I tell you everything will be okay
When I can't see past the darkness in my mind to know

I tell you to make sure you're eating three meals a day
When I've skipped 5

I tell you to take care of yourself
When I don't drink water and don't eat and get myself in dangerous situations

I tell you not to give in and to never give up
When I gave in ages ago, and give up on a daily basis

I tell you to keep in mind the fact that you are beautiful and loved
When I constantly feel like I'm just a speck of dirt on your shirt, about to be brushed away

I tell you you don't need to apologize for anything
When I am constantly apologizing to the demons in my mind

i am a paradox
i am a contradiction
i am an oxymoron
i am a hypocrite

i am a walking talking
"yes, no, maybe"

black one day
white the other
lingering between the two
because I have no morals
and I speak of fake values

never choosen a side
never made a concrete decision
my grand words oppose
my petty actions
and yet, still overshadow them
i sugarcoat them
with lame excuses for excuses

my faults are the night sky
the twinkling stars are but airplanes
polluting the purity
mistaken for a force of beautiful nature
when it is indeed
destructing
the good
destructing
the holy
with its very existence

i leap
from one pond
to the other
politically correct
depending on the situation

i am the northman
claiming to belong to the south

i am the liar
i am the lie

neither here nor there
never here
never there
*never anywhere

Subliminal but obvious
That I'm indigenous to the populace
Of all the kids that melt their ears
And rot to this
inaudible ****
That we call music...
A dangerous drug
that'll melt your brain
With a repetitive beat
All one in the same.
It's my love ade,
And all drank up
With only hate left
to fill my ear buds...
A generational gap
That I like to act like I have
To stay one step above
The music I hate
That I secretly love.
So tell me you're interests,
I'd love to respond
And show you my insolence
I've already made inner-rest
In thinking that nobody knows
I'm a hypocrite.