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VALAR MORGHULIS
~eddard stark

I had this desire
it was flowing through me
it wasn't ethical
but it felt mystical
his hands were softer
lips were sweeter
love was better
why does it feel so good
To be Bad

I feel like a ****
I feel that Bae is furious
I feel all I do to her is irk
Yet, it still remain curious

Bae says she is far from livid
She says that she never is mad
At points in time I feel timid
I feel like I've done something bad

But still, I remember the blithe times
Although I get worried, she's cute
And although I feel I commit crimes
I know it's just sarcastic, endearing dispute

And so no one is melancholy
I have no reason to be glum
Because there is no felony
Oh, Bae, why am I so dumb? ;P

Bae, you make me so very joyful
I won't forget you till the end of time
I feel utterly greatful
And I'm sorry I have run out of rhymes

You are an island
and I am the sea,
but somehow, ironically,
I am enveloped in thee.

Should I step up my game?
Or should I just wait another time?
You are my best friend
But I like you more then JUST friends

I told you every problem I had
I never kept any secret to you
We are together most of the time
Can I still do this if you are my girlfriend

Should I smile
Because we are friends ?
Or should I cry
Because that's the only thing
We can ever be?

Clouded thoughts of you incript my mind
and my hands grasp my chest as I seem to have lost the ability to breathe somewhere along the winding road where on every corner you sold me lies. I thought the innocence you portrayed was liable to your soul but I was hypnotized by the way your eyes wandered my body and the color in them stole the vividity of my creative mind so now as I sit and try to combine words that will never fully portray the sense of wonder you left me with every time you failed to reply to my missed calls and texts I question whether you genuinely loved me or loved the idea of my body against yours in the moonlight.

Last time
it was because I hid my feelings
and released them
through deep sighs
late at night
that only you could hear

Last time
it felt as though
the pain
would never stop escaping
from my pores
and the air around me
was thick with sadness

This time
it was because you could not bear
the pain of saying goodbye
when hello only came
after 10 pm, drink in hand

This time
I feel like I am choking
on every drink you have ever given me
and the only way out
is to bring the memories back up
like swords in my throat

Last time
I fixed the problem
with sleepless nights
by your side

Last time
going to bed
became a necessity
I grew to hate

This time
the problem
was waking up next to you
and leaving shortly after

This time
I wake up
with a heart
that feels like it was beaten
and bruised
in the night

Last time
you came back
because you never
really left

This time
I think you are gone
but I am too afraid
to check

I still do not have words for you
and my silence in the restaurant
was not due to speechlessness
or too many thoughts
trying to force their way out

I have just run out of ways
to rephrase the sentences
I say to you
every time
we do this

It doesn't hurt any less
and I still haven't lost
my will to fight for you
but I have learned
when to save my breath with you
because I know there will be
another time
when you will take it away

I woke up
thinking about that time
we stifled our movements
to keep from being heard
by your friend in the next room

The sun on your back,
I tried to wrap my fingers
around rays of light
and run them down your rib cage

Our lips hit like bolts of lightning
followed by thundering smiles
and streams of hot air

Your hands held me
as I wiped the hair
from your forehead
and laughed into your ear

As you try to peel your body
away from mine
I summon you back
with the taste of my tongue
until you have ingrained it
into your memory
and can remove yourself
without unanswered questions