Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Since Blairmerica, jobseeker's frills ain't been allowed.
Plasma screen no opioid to the baying crowd.
Government's Queen Hel callgirl, one ambrosial ***;
my own mother's milk was ******'s Nesquik.
But I always had nice pair of Nike Air Child Benefits.
The 3rd World War will be fought
instant they stop my Income Support.
The Union Jack won't be my blanket
on a green and pleasant embankment.
What exactly is it you want, John?

I only wish the benefits system loved me like I love it.

Tell Scameron & Tossbourne the effect of a green ounce
presages a fuel crisis on Joyseeker's Allow-ounce.
Smother your kids if they wanna grow up rich
- don't gedda wear plain pair of Air Max Tax Credits!
Coz being on the dole is cushty for the soul.
There's a K in the House of Lords if you
gimme a swig of your ****.
There's a P in the House of Lords if you
gimme a swig of your meths.
What exactly is it you want, John?

I only wish the benefits system loved me like I love it.

Marry me, we'll live in ****, Mrs.Iain Duncan Smith.
Marry me, twos on that spliff, Mrs. Iain Duncan Smith.
Marry me and our kids will aspire to ******* ****.
Marry me and for tea we will have broken biscuits.
Marry me, we will live like Smiths, Mrs. Iain Duncan ****.
Marry me, we'll live in ****.
Written about the last Tory government, but it's applicable to all Economic Social Darwinist administrations.
<robotic singing>

The Russians have Colonel Troutman,
Don't know what to do about him,
And the Russians have Colonel Troutman.

Cannot get any respect in...
...his People they were abandoned,
Heart in chest, it is pounding,
America in fight since founding,
And the Russians have Colonel Troutman.

The Russians have Colonel Troutman,
Don't know what to do about him,
And the Russians have Colonel Troutman.

You better believe he's coming,
His name, -Rambo/he's cunning,
The Enemy's weak are running,
Rescue the Colonel, -don't doubt him,
******'s cannot have the Troutman!

The Russians have Colonel Troutman,
Don't know what to do about him,
And the Russians have Colonel Troutman,

Rambo, John J.
Cannot be stopped they say,
Patriot's heart in play,
Russians are going to pay.
Cold War became Hot today,
They don't know what to do about him?

They ****** up when they seized the Troutman!

The Russians have Colonel Troutman,
Don't know what to do about him,
And the Russians have Colonel Troutman.
Rambo is all about 'em,
Coming now, -never doubt him,
John J. the guerilla, -a mountain,
and the Russians had Colonel Troutman.

The Russians had Colonel Troutman,
Didn't know what to do about him,
And the Russians lost Colonel Troutman.
Watched the all day marathon. Rambo III in Afghanistan. Couldn't help but...help.

— The End —