I was left soaking in my sorrow Hoping there will be a better tomorrow Constant check ups to see how he's doing But never once was I one he was pursuing I prayed and cried hoping he'd regret hurting me Coming back apologizing for deserting me Until someone else came along and reminded me of my worth I'm stronger and pray for him to stay far from my turf
I'm so glad Biboe came into my life. for the past couple of months I cried or sat in silence hurting for what another did to me. Biboe gave me the attention I longed for. I realized through him I am beautiful and strong. And he's the one that deserves my heart. Not someone who cheats and leaves me to questioning if I'm ever going to be good enough.
Treated, as if my heart's like yours Talked to, as if I intruded your words Looked on, and had brought my eyes nurture, But my couple of words never went any further. You're kind and you're caring, But you'll never try hearing, Just what my tongue ponders And just what I am bearing.
It's true that I'm wrong, But it's wrong what you've sung, That I'm painted real pretty And I'm made from some stone. Don't feel lost or feel pity, Just keep talking and loving me.
See it's simple my darling There's no pain or torture It's just weary and frailty, And imperfections unblurred.
It takes time and good vision, It takes feeling some words. It takes more than you'll realize, But it's not so unsure, That I'll quickly find inside, All the sweet and the pure.
Dear heart. I know you're somewhere and it scares me that I can't find you. Did I lose you to that boy I spoke about all the time? Did I lose you to friends that left? Did I lose you to the pain you felt? The pain I ignored? They pain I misjudged? Hello? Are you there? I can’t hear you beating anymore? I know you're out there and I need to talk to you. I need to tell you how I feel. Please answer me! Maybe you're gone because I hurt you. I didn't mean to. I just wanted somebody to talk to. Now you're gone and I don't even know for how long that will be. all I'm saying is that when you learn to forgive me I hope you'll come back. I need you. I can't live without you. Continue to beat, because eventually I'll find you.
Soul blank and empty A fresh canvas Shining flecks of love But stored in the dark
I can't paint over it The creation held becomes still Fixed in place and just a fragment of dream
I wish to stay in my glass castle in the void My dream to live The perfect blackness unknown and bare Naked Exposed as it's formless husk
They will never know who I am My canvas is drawn into the dark I can't keep it from leaving
Another dive into my event horizon Another time **** you
We aren't finished perfecting you
One last time you dog Into that breach one last time
I am currently very lost in my life and can't seem to stick to one thing to focus on for a career. I am 22 and feel like I am wasting time, every day slips past me faster and faster. My canvas is myself, I am unsure what to paint on it. I don't want to be known and understood as it simplifies what I am as a human and a person. I don't use social media as it places me inside a box and the box is not big enough. I took acid a long time ago and it totally rewired my brain. Opening me up to so much of the world I had closed out, and now I think I have to take it again to reach that point where I can wire my brain into a more clear picture. It is a dangerous proposition and I do not take this idea scenario lightly, this could change a lot in my life and I am not sure I am ready for what it could do to me. I must meditate on what I have going on in my brain. Loving thoughts to you all. -A lost young man
emotional speaking, you left me i hate you i did everything for you i'm making you happy i'm not real there not real get out of my head she calls me names why is there four of me i have friends you just cant see them first they were a game now your comfort i failed
i failed at helping you and that is of no fault of mine i have tried and failed
breaking down speaking,
you dint want to be my friend but the voices do they shower me in ink as if my own blood was pouring over me black oozing ink mettalic oh its wonderful they wave and smile i can see them but you cant unfortunately they can see you
what i want to say.
H E L P
i'm begging you she's begging you were begging you
I am afraid of being happy Of waking up wanting to start the day Of accepting myself for who I am Of losing the motivation for my art because I’m no longer so sad and alone Of losing the bubble I created for writing since I have no one to turn to no one to talk to no one to belong to
I am afraid of being
I am afraid of the potential I possess I don’t mean to sound arrogant or proud Because I’m not
I am just me
I walk around the halls sheltered and afraid Afraid of the people I see around me Every one of these individuals has a hidden talent, A secret, A love, A vice,
And what do I have? Just me.
If I am not walking with a false bravado Shining plastered smiles to hide my fear I am invisible I am shoved Pushed Tossed Turned Unrecognizable
Mikayla DeAnn Kay
I am afraid of letting go If I let go, I am letting go of the control I possess, My only vice I am letting go of the years of “you’re not good enough” The years of “you’re not pretty enough” The years of “you’re not skinny enough” The years of “you’re not worthy” The years of “you do not belong”
I want to shine I want to smile I want to make others happy without losing pieces of myself I want to be confident in what I like What I wear What I desire I want to feel whole I want to be seen