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Bella Isaacs Mar 16
Oh the irony
When I called you the guy
Whose music saved me
And now some days I nearly die
And right now I curse your name
And I think, wherever you lie
I hope you lie and feel something the same
Like I, so exhausted I can't even cry
I asked for a bit of kindness, that is all.
And then I remember how messed up you are
Already, uncharitably, and charitably, I fall
Into the comforting thought that so far
And further, you're punishing yourself
And that I could have tried to help
But I'm helping better by focusing on myself
And leaving you to your own quiet yelp
Into the empty world you framed it well to be;
And I think, Stuff it, I deserve far, far better
And not even from you, just generally
And one day I won't blame you, still bitter
As you are, transcendent as I will be -
I wish I could say I felt you deserved my pity.
Just getting the mad feelings in my chest and head onto a page.
He could have tried harder;
perhaps he did his best;
his best wasn't good enough:
put the matter to rest.
(For now)
G A Lopez Jun 2020
One of these days
I'm gonna leave this place

I'll disappear
Far away from here.

I'll vanish and everyone will be clueless
Left wondering about my existence.

I'll do everything I want alone
Myself, my only companion.
Metaleska Mar 2020
screaming into void
trying to gain something
nothing happens;
the void stays
still searching for something
still feeling the emptiness

facing each day
recharging on my own
spreading positivity around
receiving emptiness
the void stays

painful to watch pain
painful to feel
painful to let go
I still move into the void
in hope of finding something

trying to be cold
trying to control emotions
trying to stay strong
I still wander in this void
searching for something

something feels like a distant home
walking endlessly towards it.

I have started to breathe freely
now, the something is me
I am still searching for myself
starting to decipher the void within me
NOW feels freeing 💜
Rozey Mar 2019
I was left soaking in my sorrow
Hoping there will be a better tomorrow
Constant check ups to see how he's doing
But never once was I one he was pursuing
I prayed and cried hoping he'd regret hurting me
Coming back apologizing for deserting me
Until someone else came along and reminded me of my worth
I'm stronger and pray for him to stay far from my turf
I'm so glad Biboe came into my life. for the past couple of months I cried or sat in silence hurting for what another did to me. Biboe gave me the attention I longed for. I realized through him I am beautiful and strong. And he's the one that deserves my heart. Not someone who cheats and leaves me to questioning if I'm ever going to be good enough.
Stephanie Oct 2018
There is a line
Dividing myself from myself
I am two tormented bodies
Merged intricately into one skin

Trouble is looming

They want out and I am trying to mediate The conflict
They are tired and insecure
They want themself to themselves

And I want it all

I can see the marks on my skin
The stretching and the pulling
And the tearing apart
It cracks and flakes
And I watch me lose my faith
Fragment by fragment

There is a line
It can be felt but not seen
It is hard and bold
And obscured by fantasy

There is a line
That awaits
The tug of acceptance
Once the collision
At long last
Something real
Ndanyanyukwa Sep 2018
Dear heart.
I know you're somewhere and
it scares me that I can't find you.
Did I lose you to that boy I spoke about all the time?
Did I lose you to friends that left?
Did I lose you to the pain you felt?
The pain I ignored?
They pain I misjudged?
Are you there?
I can’t hear you beating anymore?
I know you're out there and I need to talk to you.
I need to tell you how I feel.
Please answer me!
Maybe you're gone because I hurt you.
I didn't mean to.
I just wanted somebody to talk to.
Now you're gone and I don't even know for how long that will be.
all I'm saying is that when you learn to forgive me I hope you'll come back.
I need you.
I can't live without you.
Continue to beat, because eventually I'll find you.
Roman B Sep 2018
Soul blank and empty
A fresh canvas
Shining flecks of love
But stored in the dark

I can't paint over it
The creation held becomes still
Fixed in place and just a fragment of dream

I wish to stay in my glass castle in the void
My dream to live
The perfect blackness unknown and bare
Exposed as it's formless husk

They will never know who I am
My canvas is drawn into the dark
I can't keep it from leaving

Another dive into my event horizon
Another time **** you

We aren't finished perfecting you

One last time you dog
Into that breach one last time
I am currently very lost in my life and can't seem to stick to one thing to focus on for a career. I am 22 and feel like I am wasting time, every day slips past me faster and faster. My canvas is myself, I am unsure what to paint on it. I don't want to be known and understood as it simplifies what I am as a human and a person. I don't use social media as it places me inside a box and the box is not big enough. I took acid a long time ago and it totally rewired my brain. Opening me up to so much of the world I had closed out, and now I think I have to take it again to reach that point where I can wire my brain into a more clear picture. It is a dangerous proposition and I do not take this idea scenario lightly, this could change a lot in my life and I am not sure I am ready for what it could do to me. I must meditate on what I have going on in my brain. Loving thoughts to you all.
-A lost young man
Jasmine dryer Aug 2018
emotional speaking,
you left me i hate you
i did everything for you
i'm making you happy
i'm not real
there not real get out of my head
she calls me names
why is there four of me
i have friends
you just cant see them
first they  were a game
now your comfort
i failed

Analytically speaking,

i failed at helping you
and that is of no fault of mine
i have tried
and failed

breaking down speaking,

you dint want to be my friend
but the voices do
they shower me in ink
as if my own blood was pouring over me
oozing ink
oh its wonderful
they wave
and smile
i can see them
but you cant
they can see you

what i want to say.



*******  PLEASE

i'm begging you
she's begging you
were begging you
please don't listen to them please hear me

raw emotion no filter
The Unsung Song Mar 2018
I am a bird caught in a tree.
This is where I'm meant to be,
but I feel lost,
and without meaning.

I am looking,
for something original within myself.
Instead, I find that,
I'm only copying someone else.

I don't want to be me.
I'd rather be a bird,
who doesn't have to worry,
about whether or not it will ever be free.

Free from it's own society.

Every time I look into the mirror,
I see a boy,
instead of a man.

Because what is a man,
if he is controlled,
by the beliefs and thoughts,
of someone all the way across the world?

Someone who is typing words into a keyboard.
Words that they think hold no meaning.
But instead,
they make my soul crumble,
into ash and dust.

I am a bird caught in a tree.
There is no where to go for me.
Constantly craving excitement,
but unable to leave my own home.

Will I ever be free?
From my own society?
DeAnn Mar 2018
I am afraid of letting go
And losing control

I am afraid of being happy
Of waking up wanting to start the day
Of accepting myself for who I am
Of losing the motivation for my art because I’m no longer so sad and alone
Of losing the bubble I created for writing since I have no one to turn to
no one to talk to
no one to belong to

I am afraid of being

I am afraid of the potential I possess
I don’t mean to sound arrogant or proud
Because I’m not

I am just me


I walk around the halls sheltered and afraid
Afraid of the people I see around me
Every one of these individuals has a hidden talent,
A secret,
A love, A vice,

And what do I have?
Just me.

Mikayla DeAnn.

If I am not walking with a false bravado
Shining plastered smiles to hide my fear
I am invisible
I am shoved

Mikayla DeAnn Kay

I am afraid of letting go
If I let go, I am letting go of the control I possess,
My only vice
I am letting go of the years of “you’re not good enough”
The years of “you’re not pretty enough”
The years of “you’re not skinny enough”
The years of “you’re not worthy”
The years of “you do not belong”

Mikayla DeAnn

I want to shine
I want to smile
I want to make others happy without losing pieces of myself
I want to be confident in what I like
What I wear
What I desire
I want to feel whole
I want to be seen

I want to become… no

I am

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