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KM Ramsey Dec 2015
i can't rip myself to shreds
and then wonder why you look at me
like some sort of miasma
of pity and misfortune
that your sun couldn't melt
and congeal into something
recognizable
something human
i wonder if you see just a beast
an animal whose only chance
at survival is
fight or flight

i see white and
your face burns away
bubbling in the heat
of my nuclear explosions

i bury land mines in my own backyard
and play games
leisurely strolls
blindfolds
and a racing heart
exploding from the center of my being
praying to ignite that
chain reaction

you tell me not to be stupid
not to do anything stupid
but stupid is a relative planet
orbiting myself
and eclipsing truth that
to the rest of the human race
is divine prophecy
and absolute reality

i'm alone even in your presence
because i'm not there
and can't you see it written
like neon braille across my face
and branded with a white-hot poker
into the blue green of my iris
why do i need to live when
this life is just as
construed as a dream
and as tangible as a nightmare

i'm lost

and i can't find your hand
as i ***** in the darkness
to lead me back to life
and sanity
but you aren't looking for me
because i'm standing right next to you
even though i'm gone.
letters to you i'll never send
Isaac Huston Dec 2015
Life is beautiful,
Even in its ******* things.
The small bags of life-
The creases in the paper,
The untying bands of bracelet,
The crinkled edges of the dollar bill,
The thin dark gunk
Collected upon the penny,
The uneven water splashed upon
The bathroom sink,
The droplets upon the toothbrush,
The random foam of the fluoride rinse,
The fraying strands of gray and black
Athletic sock,
The clouded water
Lying below the ivory soap
In its dish-
These are unpleasant, yes,
But they remind us
That we are in this world,
That this is no false world
But a quite real one,
One which we can shape
Or help shape,
One that is worth living in,
Worth loving in,
A good world.
Amanda Elizabeth Nov 2015
can I even complicate
my continuum of thoughts?
if so, will I ever be able
to stop?
If I dig deeper
There's no air
There's no warmth
There's not a soul being
in sight
Oh, I'll
drown
won't I?

Oh my mind
It's ill-defined,
hazey
it's left me severed
I'm sightless.
did the unknown hinder a
blind tragedy?
They tell me,
We can pretend for awhile
So i'll pour the sea in my head,
I'll make it full again.
but my mind will only be
under siege
it's a temporary fix
Like leaking my dreams with
matchsticks

can I even complicate the patterns
that I inhale?
such a strange feeling
as if you can't grasp your mind
when your psyche
is flooded
What is real? What is mine?
To what extent is detachment twisted
When you can no longer
reach
the surface ?

I see an oceanic void where
the only movements are
the vibration of my bones
not radiating in dance; they're
shaking,
shaking
in this abyss
11/15/15
MsAmendable Nov 2015
Soft cotton fingers
Gently lift my head
From rolling shoulders
Rising up like smoke,
A waking dreamless sleep.
Rest, wanderer
Be still.
Roo Nov 2015
"When I dropped him, I shattered"**
the jagged body parts that hadn't
seen a regular shower since the
sadness kicked in
slit into my arms in shapes
people only recognise as a
cry for help.

I recoil from my reflection,
even my face feels foreign
but that doesn't compare to this
detachment; being unable to
recognise my own family in
a sea of unknown faces.
Bruises that I don't remember,
no recollection of a time before.

My body is in a state of flux,
moving with the objects
around me and no matter
how hard I try to ground myself,
6 hours becomes 24 becomes 48
and I'm screaming out for attention
silently, hoping that someone will
convince me that it is real.
That I am me and you are you -
just don't shut your eyes;
the darkness is where it really begins.
QUOTES IN BOLD ARE FROM "BOYFRIEND INTERVIEW" BY HALEY MOSLEY.
V Oct 2015
No amount of pills could ever "cure" me and no amount of doctors could truly know my pain,
Why I refuse to look in any mirror and why I sometimes almost go insane.

No therapy could ever make it "disappear" completely, or diagnosis try to "understand" me.

You see, I am not crazy or lost, I am not wanting "attention" or daft,
But I search for all that I've lost-
Freedom and memory, my smile and laugh.


Excerpt No. 5
V Oct 2015
"Happiness is wrong,
Sadness is right,
Healing is darkness,
And pain is the light.
To conquer pain is to add more,
On this you can be sure.
Love is hatred and cruel,
No one could ever love you- this world is dull."

If that is so, I would rather be killed saving lives,
Than live in peace within your twisted lies.


Excerpt No. 4
mrmonst3r Oct 2015
No matter
How I try
My words
remain hollow,
Painful
To swallow
Vacant
Upon
my tongue.
Buried
In my
tombstone
Skull,
I'm further
from you
Still.
Ain't got no motive
Ain't got no friends
Unsure of my
own
Intent
Is this worth
my time?
Alone
By design,
I'll
remain
Forever,
Distant.
rook Sep 2015
did you take your medicine this morning?
we noticed you haven't come out of your room all day. yes, the appointment is the 29th.

you didn't write down the homework. what homework?
you can't turn it in now.

if i help myself, i might lose you

you're a talented writer, i saw that from early on
but as a reader, it's impossible to like the narrator
he's sort of an immature ****
...yes?

the sound of an entry plug fills your senses
lcl
the primordial ooze
hair should be floating but nothing changes
nothing at all
did they really think this through?

dissociating
is an interesting thing
do you realize
that these lines dont make sense
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