I am longing for the night-
wishing for nothing but sleep
but when the night comes,
I lay in bed,
awaiting a serenity that
isn’t so imminent.
A restlessness stirs within me,
not realizing its still hours
until dawn.

And oh do you have some nerve,
Stroking my hair on the coach ride home
Then leaving me before our stop.

You smile and laugh,
Like every word we share is an inside joke
And then leave before I have time to open my eyes.

But now they've never been wider,
I may have had them closed the whole ride back,
When I rest my head on your chest,
But your ribs hold no weight.

My head is filled with helium,
I'll float myself away from you so fast and
I should have known when I noticed your seatbelt was undone.

That I was never going to be a concern to you,
That you feel no guilt for the casualties.

I'm prophetic and live my life through others words,
I'm socratic and will accept death when it's my turn.
All my knowledge is fulfilled with conjecture,
I'm painfully obsequious when involving niche lectures.

I'm fitting with paranoia and it riddles my brain;
Obsessed with the thoughts of passing away,
As time slips away quicker and quicker everyday.

My perception is perceived but acknowledge my sentience and you'll see;
There's a dark soul deep inside of me.

Tonight feels like my last fight as I write with a knife;
My sallow eyes drift aside as my hope for a better life resides,
And the pen I call a knife inches closer to stealing my life.
As I lay back and stare into the black corner of this one-track world of false fact;
I realise in my transient fit of thought that there's no going back.

My perception is perceived but acknowledge my sentience and you'll see;
There's a dark soul deep inside of me.

i used to be so in love,
a feeling blessed upon me from above.
and the girl i loved,
made my heart jump.
and in such an amazing way,
whenever i thought about her my sordid thoughts would melt away.

and somewhere along the years; she twisted and changed,
she wasn't the same person; in only a matter of days.
as if the innocence and eloquence of her person had died,
but i fell to my knees whenever i reciprocated eyes.

the girl i knew died a long time ago,
i can't even recall her eye colour; blue, green, hazel? i don't know.
the girl i knew fizzled away,
her heart grew cold, and the love got frayed.
and maybe i shouldn't of saved her,
it would of saved me a lot of ink and paper.

because the girl i loved died a long time before i,
the girl i loved died,
the girl i love died.

Maybe you found someone new...
And this is probably my cue...
So I sat in in my room...
The door locked, i’m ready to shoot...
To leave and let go...
Cause You make feel so old...
And make me feel like a fool...
Because it’s been so long...
Where I haven’t really meant my “l love
you”s...
And how stupid of me...
How I felt so blue...
Falling in love with the broken pieces of the memories with you...
I don’t know what I’m supposed to do...
With all these feelings I feel for you...
So I guess it’s my cue...
To leave and let go of all my things I felt for you....
And knowing the sky...
is under the lovers unite...
the stars came down...
Whispering on how our fates were perfectly aligned...
and at a hundred and two...
I sat, staring up...

And for a moment I felt like I really loved you...

Nothing matters in the end.
We either **** up the world even more.
Or change it.
But it doesn’t matter in the end.
Because we all die.

We check under our beds
for monsters but
don’t check for the ones
living in our heads.

There once was a boy,
Lonely and stripped of all joy.
He burnt his skin,
As his soul withered within.

As the days passed,
He coveted for the days that'd be his last.
And all his acquaintances shrugged,
But it was his grave they dug.

All those nights alone in a room,
On parchment pieces he sculpted his doom.
And with prowess he slipped into the unknown,
Into the hell where youth and laughter go.

I seem to know how
to chase the stars-
but never how to
catch them.