An Apple a day will make you
chop down the tree, and make a sign
saying dentists not welcome...
I miss my dentist.
I miss the smell of disinfectant in his office,
The sound of the water pick
The taste of his latex gloves in my mouth.
I miss the one-sided conversations about the philosophies of life.
I miss hearing about how his wife and his kids are doing.
The gossip about Roxanne’s new boyfriend or the new shipment of fluoride that just came in.
I miss the sound of the secretary's keyboard as she types up the report stating that
I am cavity free.
I miss him telling me how healthy and beautiful my smile is.
I miss him thoughtfully listening to my life complaints as he examines my x-rays.
I miss his advice, the wise counsel he’d give regarding my schooling or love life and the way he’d wink when he says I’m good for another six months.
But those six months couldn’t come fast enough.
Jenny broke up with her ex for the 4th time, Paul quit his job before a drug test, Sherry dropped out of college, my roommate is pregnant, Dad bought a pet kangaroo, my apartment is infested with small beetel things, I’ve only eaten ramen for the past 3 days and Cason proposed to me.
I don’t know how to handle it all.
I miss my therapist.
I mean my dentist.
I like a tree
Trees are good
Nothing nicer than a walk in the wood
Small or tall, I like them all
Every lean evergreen
I’ve ever seen
Deciduousness with their autumn mess
They all breath life into the wilderness
I’ve never seen a tree
That would disagree with me
Or that greets the world more beautifully
It’s a home, a resource and a factory
Although I’m not so sure about the dentistry. (That one stings)
Lying in the dentist chair I had this thought
Im sitting in the dentist office while the doctor drills my teeth,
I wonder if they realize I’m so full of holes
I might slide right through this seat,
They can fill my cavities,
But They’ll never make me whole,
Cause they can fix my teeth,
But they can’t fix my soul.
I’m actually at the dentist right now.
Ive been to the dentist
She gave ma a happy pill ME a happy pill, not Ma a happy pill
Tree frogs are my favotire amphibians there so cute ya wanna buy them an ice cream but there aint no bug ice scream
Yes I’m fine than k you
Gosh this is still fun
And they gave me a new toothbrush although I use the super-golly-gee-****-quadro-toothbrush-thing-that-lights-up-and-stuff
Yes the pill is wearing off sure
Why do they all put their hands in my mouth at the same time
Lets see thats four hands
And then they yell at me to relax
But yeah I got a pill qnd I am sooooooooooooooooooo relaxed
My teeth are fine
My teeth are green no wait my teeth or clean because if they were green they wouldn’t be clean
Dr. Joyce is the best
There’s still something to be said for tree frogs
Yes I can walk to the car whoops
Yes I can opine the passenger door
Yes I can belt my seat fashion
Or somethingthis has been fun
Thank you yes six monyhsts…
Your ‘umble scrivener’s site is:
It’s not at all reactionary, tho’ it might be drivel.
Lawrence Hall’s vanity publications are available on amazon.com as Kindle and on bits of dead tree: The Road to Magdalena, Paleo-Hippies at Work and Play, Lady with a Dead Turtle, Don’t Forget Your Shoes and Grapes, Coffee and a Dead Alligator to Go, and Dispatches from the Colonial Office.
Tooth grabs attention
It making me feel terrible
Time to call dentist.
Tooth aches are an ouch.
Ouch I should have gone before
Appointment is made.
Too late Root Canal.
A day my pain will finally stop.
Numbness here I come.
Just doing the not fun part of life
I caught the scent
On my breath today,
I think something deep
And is withering away.