"You're beautiful"
A stranger so plainly writes
The notification appears so clearly
At top of screen
You pull and stretch your shirt
So as to better hide your body
Stumbling towards the mirror
You prepare yourself for battle
The dysmorphia of your body
So violently attacks your subconscious
Every mirror, camera, reflection in window
So clearly reminds you of ugliness, the
shadow that creeps behind, that you can't escape from
You pick at your body
Squeeze, pinch, and dissect every cell
As you find each and every thing
Wrong
You long for the day where you say
"I'm beautiful"

I am
sweating
laying in a soft bed,
gazing
out through my open bedroom window
at a eucalyptus tree
gently swaying and shaking
in the cool summer breeze
which is wafting in through the open window
blowing over my body
cooling me down;

I am
cool-summer-breeze-Happy.

I am
laying comfortably in my soft bed and
cool summer breeze is
wafting in through my open bedroom window
blowing over my body
cooling me down;

I am
cool-summer-breeze-Happy.

Feelings
                   lanoitidnocnU
Comfort  
                   gnissiK

The purity must be cast aside to see God equal in all people.
For all are unified in station and wealth in rank before God, none more righteous nor more rich than another.
In this case God enriches all of us in our lack and withholds in our fortune.
For none is self-sufficient without Him.
Purity is more about the strength of desire.
It is easy to remain pure when its fires are not enflamed.
What does purity and righteousness hold?
It can only be detachment from the world.
The "world" meaning that which takes us from our Lord.
Is it right to delight in purity?
It seems so empty in a world with so few single women my age that doesn't have kids nor does drugs.
I actually don't even know one. Really.
I'm pure for myself then only?
To delight in my righteousness to only belittle the feeble?
To stand as a noble eunich with the ****** 40 & 50 somethings?
If I'm pure, I have no home in the dust.
I have no friend to share in purity.
Purity is outward.
How do I perceive reality with outward orientation?
Pure ways become my mantra.
Not just chaste eyes, but a pure body.
I become enslaved to worship my own body.
My outer body has no significance to me.
I smoke cigarettes to fight my eyes from transfixing on it.
I postpone workouts until not my body but my energy is in need of vitality.
I tattoo my skin to break the idol of the body.

fear is a tiny seed
planted in my lower belly.
my thoughts fuel the seed
to sprout with gentle ease.
its roots are finally free,
wrapping around my feet,
never letting me flee.
it grows into a nimble tree
whose branches strangle me.
the tree wears prickly leaves
that sting my aching body
until my eyes succumb to sleep.

I slept pretty well in bed last night.
But something startled me, made my heart beat very fast.
At first I couldn’t figure out what was happening.
Then I realized I was dreaming of you.
Is it at all possible, that you were dreaming me?
Is it possible that you pulled me telepathically into your bed?
I was eased into your comfortable embrace;
laying underneath you in total darkness,
we were both unrobed steeped in passion.
We didn’t look into each other’s eyes,
because the darkness held all control.
Both of us knew that the time had come,
for us to close that mysterious gap.
You caressed my face and kissed my neck,
you kissed my lips and magic happened.
Our bodies were electrified, our souls caught fire,
and your kiss sent chills all over my body.
My heart was beating faster and faster,
my body was yours and nothing else mattered.
I guess I couldn’t take the energy that surged,
from your body Into my soul.
When you kissed me again, I came to my senses.
My body went into some sort of shock,
the moment felt real, but I knew it was not.
So I told myself to wake the **** up!
When I opened my eyes, I was back in my bed,
covered in sweat, and eyes wide open.
Heart still beating incredibly fast,
while my spirit slumbered in widespread shame.

Trickle in like the sunrise and
Be my muse.
Destructive fiction in this mind of mine,
I play to lose.

After all,
Love is love
And I will succumb every time.
No matter how far or in between,
I will be here in body and mind.

our kisses are pink
your fingertips blue
my neck purple
pop goes the balloon

my hands in your hair
you taste of cherry
and pop goes my heart
just like confetti