Mom, Dad
Why can't you see the pain I'm in
I know I don't tell you anything
Or let you in to see
But you should know me

I know you don't believe in psychology
But still you should see
That my mental health is crumbling
You can't deny
That you aren't doing anything to save my life

You can't save me from anything
Not the undiagnosed ADHD
Not the undiagnosed Anorexia Nervosa
Not the undiagnosed Anxiety
I'm breaking but you aren't trying to save me

Not from the undiagnosed depression
Or the undiagnosed body dysmorphia
Or the anger issues you gave me
Why do you have to run from the truth
That psychology is true

You never tried to protect me from the ones who broke my heart
The the man who tried to touch me
When you where just a floor above me
You may believe its just a phase
But the broken has set in and its here to stay

If you would just open your eyes
To the truth
Then maybe
Just maybe
I'd let my walls down for you

But until you come to your senses
I'll wait here in  pain
For you to come and push it away
Hug me till you arms ache
And wipe the tears from my face

I know that one day
You will open your eyes
And I know that I'm a pain
But for right now my only complaint
Is that you let me go undiagnosed

My hands shake
With the memory of the gag
Or was it the blade
Either way
They shake

My whole self shivers
As a constant cold
Seeps through my many layers
All the blankets in the world
Well never stop my constant shiver

My stomach shoots with pain
The kind of pain you can't shake
Though I know it will eventually go away
Is it bad
That I kind of long for that pain

My throat begins to burn
While my tooth enamel decays
Because stomach acid really is a strong thing
Flushing the toilet
Where my last meal swirls away

I have a really bad headache
That never goes away
But sooner or later the pain will begin to fade
But its my thoughts that provide the most pain
Even more that this pounding headache

Sometimes it all goes blank
And I wish I could stay
There in that blankness, always
Where my mind is clear
And the pain is miles away

But all this pain is worth it
Because at the end of the day
I'm left with a skeleton body
And my best friend Ana
Who will never leave me, there's no way

Ana,

I've known you for a while,
And at first I was afraid.
I didn't know what you'd do
Or whether you could help me.

Now I don't see why
Everyone I know is so
Pressed about me
Being friends with you...

I don't know why
they don't like you.
They try to keep me away
From you and your help.

You're a kind person,
And you've helped me.
You make me happy.
You fix my problems.

I hope you can explain
Why people don't like you.

How she moved so carelessly
when touched by the evening breeze
she sparkled like the light ***** in the night sky
however, I heard the anguish in her laugh
she consistently kissed me like it was her last kiss
danced as if it was her last dace
lived as if it was her last night
fascinated by everything
but I was only fascinated by her
how tiny her fingers were around her cigarette
how her bones looked like
they were about to leave her body
I never understood
But as she took off
Her bones became stardust
longing to get home
now I understand
that she never was supposed to be here with me
god had other plans for my angel