Your door wasn’t locked
and I wasn’t going to wait

Not after I sprinted here,
that’s quite a long way

I’ve run 3 kilometres just to see you

Kiss my shoe, be grateful.
Surely I am owed some compensation
For my extensive dedication

I’ll take advantage
the only time I know you’re weak
You can’t set boundaries
when you’re asleep

Your vulnerability makes me greedy
the thought of you subdued,
****. Debilitated and unconscious
Entitled, I claim that time with you

"Thanks!", I tell the rope that promises to hold me, tight,
Unbeknownst, being strangled, that I won't survive the night.

Lipstick stains all over your mouth mixed with drawn blood as your tongue crashed violently around my insides
As you traveled
you left behind your mark as if I were something to be discovered
Some the size of Ireland
Others the size of Australia
When the sunlight reflects on our window, I am reminded that it is my time to be vulnerable
Rubbing orange peels on my aching body as if there were a bad spirit that needed to be warded off
Your nose would scrunch up,
but even still your amber eyes seemed ready to sap away my soul
Leaving behind a husk of a body
My straw hair falling off each limb
just like the leaves gathered on the forest floor
I longed to crush them under my sole
The marks on my body seem to have started to absorb the yellow from your eyes
I can’t seem to get rid of you
The avocado toast in the mornings only seem to fill me up temporarily before they are all expelled
Oh how quickly avocados turn ugly!
My nostrils are filling with an emptiness that is cold and engulfing
My head is a boat
I will sail away even if I’m tattered
The raging storm lurks behind me and threatens to end us both
But I know behind those dark clouds
there will be an array of colors
waiting for my happy ending to be painted

(m.p)

it’s confusing to me
and maybe this is where
the grooming,
psychological abusing
comes from.
i’m used and discarded,
tossed into the recycling bin
until i’m reused again.
and again.
every time making me
a little weaker
than the time before.
a little less able to refuse.
a little easier to bend,
to break.
the lack of permanency
in the place i long for,
the place in which
i never got to stay for long,
only to be hauled away and
returned upon further notice.

Blinded by a setting sun,
8pm on a summer night,
You say to me,
"My, my, look into those eyes."
Looking back at you is the sun,
His eyes are deep down brown.

Why won't you leave?
I'm begging, please.
Blinded by a marital dream,
Don't see the harm we receive.

Spend the midnight hours,
Rummaging through the old,
You say now,
"I could be free. Maybe one day I will be."
Looking down upon you is...


Wretched hands that don't believe,
Who am I to speak,
Except I'm the one who felt it,
Searing. Burning. Cutting flesh.
To the bone. Through the marrow.
Screaming till the throat is ******,
I know who I am but I'm not real,
An imaginary character to the sun.
Did I wrap the moon around my..
broken and bruised finger?

Why won't you leave?
I'm begging, please.
Blinded by a marital dream,
Don't see the harm you receive.

I'm sorry I'm not a degenerate like you
But that's not my fault
But in your own warped minds
Filth

F Minus

am i a trophy
am i a crown
am i a flower
in your bouquet
do i shine
like a gold
in your eyes