Novocaine is needed for this pain,
It's really been affecting my brain.
Now and then I think that maybe,
it's for the best baby.
But most of the time it's a wall,
a hard, cold brick wall constantly reminding me that I love you most of all.
the stars slip through my hands like a sieve
saying you can’t love someone is hard to believe
******* another guy while i’m lost in your dreams
i don't miss you like you think i do
i guess the ends justify the means
I want to give myself to you
I swear to God I really do.
But every time we get that close
Most of me is still opposed.
That man f*cked me up,
it will always get me choked up.
I fear he'll always have control,
even though you're on patrol.
Maybe it's myself I fear the most.
Is that his master plan, to be the host?
When he's dead remains a ghost
and that is what I fear the most.
Lessons learned and losses spurned;
Burned are the sweet-nothings you often heard.
Mired in a conflict never-ending,
Stuck between loving and merely pretending.
It takes all I have to pretend I don't love you when you're around. You see through me. You are not fooled.
"Better is open rebuke than hidden love." -Proverbs 27:5
For the first two months of college I didn’t speak
Convinced everyone here are hillbilly freaks
Then you asked to borrow my paint brush
Long brown hair in a bun and brows so lush
I gave it to you in a heartbeat
Because you were the first person I thought was neat
Im still not sure how I got so lucky to befriend you
I’ve never felt a connection this real and true
When we sit in the forest smoking **** and cigarettes
And you’re still wearing the same paint covered sweats
Singing to Rihannon by Fleetwood Mac
I felt myself gaining my soul back
I can’t decipher what’s hiding behind your dark brown eyes
But your passion for art is as tall as the skies
You inspired me to change my point of view
Maybe this place isnt so bad, who knew
Your kindness cracked my heart’s thick shell
And painted the lines with shades of pastel
No boy ever told me they cried when they moved away
Your open and truthful soul makes everything ok
The freckles sprayed on your cheeks are like artwork
That’s a companion piece to your crooked smirk
I cried thinking we would drift apart once school’s done
But you told me we’ll always be friends in the long run
Thank you for being my friend
Thank you for being who you are
Fear is cold, dark, and safe.
It's always there, always stays.
It hides when it isn't bold.
But still remains truth be told.
It whispers soft before it yells.
It speaks in secrets it always tells.
It holds my tongue from giving thoughts.
It ruins lives that can't be bought.
Yet love can bring light to dark.
It can find the kindling with a spark.
It starts to smolder in childish ways,
Then catches fire and burns bright as day.
It shines right through with radiance.
It shows me to the second chance.
It fills my chest like a well lit room.
It stamps the letter and seals my doom.
Love and fear sometimes coexist.
The answer is found in who wins.
My silence before came as a fearful fool,
It's broken now, because 'I love you.'
Do you believe in the new year, new me?
Do you want to change what you believe?
Is changing your personality worth it?
To only soon realize it isn't you and give in?
What about the people in your life?
The one's facing much more strife?
Are you going to leave them behind to?
Simply to change the old you?
What was so wrong with you anyway?
You lived a life simply, day by day.
What was wrong with that?
Was it because you were a brat?
Then just change a small thing.
Wait for what this year brings.
You don't need to change all of yourself,
It most likely wouldn't help.
— The End —