dissaociation; thats what you did to me
left me bare nowhere
with no context or reception
all in an attempt
to better my situation

you were my drug
but now it's over
i can't have love
cause now I'm sober.

i've found my place
i've stopped the chase
to find my one true passion

to teach and to learn
vicariously earned
my words now have meaning in turn

lovelessly ominous
with my own fear of loneliness
now filled with the laughter of the previously unheard

become content with myself
i don't need just one help
where I was once was lost I've now found that

if there's one thing i've learnt
through my journey of growth
it's how to fill silence with friends and unknowns

for now though

by occupying my time
my eyes will keep dry
cause a busy day, keeps the emotions astray

say what you want about me
cause i know it ain't true

your friends don't believe you
and that’s a sign of the truth

i composed a script for you to listen
to all the words that I'm saying

speaking lies ain't gonna fix it
or the destruction you made...

in the past all the flowers had wilted
all the petals fell off
my mind’s no longer tilted
the good can’t be far-off

even with open arms you still wouldn’t embrace me. all you did was erase me..

from your memory and your mind, changing the narrative every time

if they were always happy moments they wouldn’t be special; it’s about living, experiences that lead to finding the people and memories that matter.

the world has no end of opportunity
only a surplus of greed for status

everyday holds a fleeting moment
that i refute my mind, no time to show it
these things, my feelings, aren't set in stone
i won't be surprised if i'm forever alone

is it the fact you don't seem to care?

or in this moment maybe i'm just unaware?

of the message that you're trying to share

i wish i knew, it’s hard to bear

why is it no one cares about you until they can't have you

i needed an outlet for my thoughts
a distraction from those memories
but everytime that i look around
i’m reminded of all the times
that we used to once share
every minute of an hour
facing dreams as one
dwindled to its core
was our passion
what once was
raw is no
more

i wonder if one day the love i attempt to give and surround myself with will ever love me back...