i am sitting in a dark room
infront of my bright blank laptop screen
i force my mind to think
i push my mind to creat
what should i write ?
what should i say ?
think .. think .. think..
am i being too dramatic?
am i complaining too much ?
aren't i using the right words?
aren't i good enouph ?
i guess i'll never be .
i better go.. i better leave ...

never roam with crowds;
go your own way

yes your path may lead to hell
which is a grave sadness;
a dire misfortune

but heaven's gate was never found
by those who roam with crowds

I almost called you babe over text yesterday
I wanted to call you babe
I think you are at that level in my life
you're one of my babes
it's because I like you
it's because I want you to fill my time
I want you to fill my time with your soul music and sweet voice
when your voice answered the phone my body melted
when you dipped me on the dance floor I fell for you
I fell so hard I was afraid I hit the floor
and you make me feel full
and you give me a warm heart
you are my heart
I want you to stay awhile

the impoverished
night-time, flashing blue, black,
is full of sirens,
but there is no one
coming to save us.

You and I met
You and I laughed
You and I danced
You and I talked
You and I wed
You and I loved
You and I fought
You and I lied
You and I screamed
You and I hurt
You and I cried

The love died.

Neither of us grieved.

I still don't want to be here
I still want to **** myself
you're not here
you promised you'd be here forever
you left
with no explanation
and you lied  
I knew you like the back of my hand
now I can't look at you
I'm scared of you
I feel like you're something different
you're probably not
you're probably happy
that's so good
it hurts
you were my best friend
so easily you were gone
but it's not my fault
you left me
I can't be sad
or feel sorry for being happy
if you're sad that's not my fault
breaking yourself in the process
of breaking me
that's not my fault

I've added up those infringements
stumped them safe, sleeping on dewed grass,
notches burnt on pain of others past to
flare to light in the light of future true.

Goodnight sweet princes, please let
me abandon you soft in this dark
I want to move without your strictures
to seek valleys again crossed with blue.

Numbers lament from my touch but this
I know to be true, it is not my turn to
dance in the ditches, but I would set fire to
dawn to seek sweet signal of your hue.