Hell is real and it's filled with versions of you
where things went right,
but you're forced to watch them
and remember how everything went wrong for you

It's funny, how we used to fake glare and sneer at each other in the halls
and now they're real
It's crazy, how close we used to be
and now we couldn't be further apart
It's scary, how we were best friends
and now you won't even look at me
It's weird, how we used to talk 24/7
and now we haven't spoken a word to each other
It's sad how we used to hate people together
and now we hate each other.

And the saddest thing is that I can't tell if you miss me or not.

Soon the year will be up
and soon you will forget about me
you were so essential in my life
why couldn't you see?

And soon you will be gone
and I will forget the color of your eyes,
the sweet smell of your cologne,
and your cute morning sighs

And soon you'll just be a memory
of our one-sided love affair
please know I loved you,
stay beautiful and take care.

I almost want an apology for how you made me feel
but like your love,
I won't be getting it

You know how I knew I loved you?
I knew because when I looked at you everything seemed right in the world
Everything seemed right if the two of us were together
When I looked at you I could see us dating
and going out to the movies and out for food
I could hear the compliments over how cute we were together
and how much they shipped us...
and I could also see us having a future together
I looked at you and I could see us living in a cozy apartment with a cat
I felt the happiness that being with you brought
I could see us being crazy and doing cute couple things
I even saw the fights we would've gotten into over dumb stuff
and getting through them
I could see us getting married
with a small wedding with all our friends and family
I swear to god I heard our children running and laughing around in the front yard
I saw us together as a happy family
I could feel the joy you made me feel then intensified by a thousand
I could see us always being there for each other and supporting one another
and I saw us growing old together
and traveling the world.
When I looked at you, I could see all the things that would never happen.
I yearned for a future that would never be and craved the idea of having you as my own.
All the things I saw were just daydreams from lonely nights
and rainy afternoons when I had to cuddle with myself because you were never there.
I loved you with all my heart and just hoped
that somehow,
some way my dreams would come true.