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spysgrandson Aug 2013
the word salad stares at me  
fearless photons fencing with my eyes:  
“the cockroach,
the blind dolphin,
General Custer,
theft by osmosis,
the death at the diner”
and other auspicious beginnings  
that pull me to the screen    
like daily lotto numbers    
I keep buying them, on credit, for pecking
and time are not real currencies  
and whatever silver or gold  
is there for the mining  
hides well behind boulders
placed there by eons
of parsimonious patience  
I will never have
spysgrandson Aug 2013
the horizon  always bewitches me
a seamless rolling of the stone, but a grand pronouncement  
in my deluded eyes  
the beginning, the end  
the sun makes its exit, stage west  
leaving crimson and gold  reminders
of what treasure came before  
white mushroom clouds descend  
casually, forming cool gray walls
sending silent shafts dancing about  
hot as any star
then comes the thunder, thumping  
or cracking,
depending on its mood  
in this sparkling spectacle,  
there is no horizon for me to see  
no place to jump off  
no “they lived happily ever after”  
only the power    
of formless forces beyond my control  
reminding me
for the first time,
again and again  
each warm rain
will wash away mountains of memories
and mist my eyes a little more
spysgrandson Aug 2013
near the surface,
just beneath the sounds of our feet
among the bones, are arrowheads
maybe a spent cartridge from the bluecoats
who brought a strange thunder,
disturbing the a cappella birdsong,
deeper
hidden in eons of darkness, unperturbed,
until now, by the shallow, scratching efforts
of the creatures above,  
a black organic soup, remnants of plants
and animals who once breathed  
like we, we who now voraciously drill
through the tired but tenacious skin  
to reach a rich marrow, one we resurrect
to blaspheme in our mobile ovens
and scatter ashes
on a deaf and dying rock  

Post Script:
The earth never forgets.
Whatever we do to ****** it is recorded, often in ways undecipherable to man, but etched  permanently somehow, somewhere.
Does the earth seek revenge?
Or is it retribution, or a reckoning?
Anything that has the power to recall every act in infinite detail and in perpetuity has the potential to respond.
Maybe a propensity to respond?  
Is the earth an angry god?
I do not know, but
the earth never forgets.
spysgrandson Aug 2013
I claim to know the wolf,
tracking scents in the high country  
though half truth requires I confess  
one has never been in my sight    
though in silent night,
in snow weighted pines
and fir, doubtless one
has eyed me in my folly    
I have seen the coyote  
scratching in the caliche  
on the stingy prairies,
crouching in the mesquite
ready for the ****,
whilst the hare hops by  
when chase ensues  
and mammal hearts race  
I have yet to see
the canine succeed  
the hare hides in Alice’s hole  
while the mangy hunter
settles for field mice  
or makes bargains with buzzards
while the flies yet crawl
on the ****
spysgrandson Jul 2013
my window, to the world  
has a view of Central Park  
the window, the view,
courtesy of Aunt Antonia
whose millions came from
the slaughter of lungs in Pennsylvania mines
she never saw, the lover she took
leaving it all to her, for his penitence,
and her tolerant presence in his penthouse
for forty years and a day  
the day she spent at his deathbed  
not even holding his hand  

no one contested the will  
not even his drunkard son who
squandered his fortune on five wives  
and landed in a trailer in Tenafly,
some said  

when Antonia made her own last laps
I was not there, but in my old place by the river
with my useless legs, the sticks of flesh and bone
that never took one step, the same legs
that earned Antonia’s silent sympathy
and divinely divested dollars

a cousin watched her passing,
pillaging her jewelry once she was gone,  
snarling to her nurses the ******* would get all else
and the cat, part of the bargain  

and I did, and each morning
when I look onto the park  
through the maid’s invisibly clean glass  
the feline is pestiferously perched
in mid frame, in park’s green summer
or white winter, reminding me  
of the mines, the insolent indifference,
the passing of millions,
the dead legs that were
my first inheritance, my curled curse
that brought me a cat
and a park where
I would never walk
spysgrandson Jul 2013
he had a third beer
before the hot platters came    
he would have had another, had she not
stared, like she going to ask every question
he did not want to answer…
how did it feel to slap his first wife?    
how did it feel to pull the trigger  
and mow men down like so many weeds?
those were the questions in her eyes  
and had he ever told anyone, what happened that night  
when they came upon a village, where the young ones
slept with the dead, their ancestors
only a few feet away, watching, mute,
beyond the paddies where they planted the rice,
the narrow trails where they hunkered and spoke
the ancient tongue, not adulterated by the romance of the French
or the clumsy amalgam of shredded sounds from the new soldiers  
the giants who ignored them in the steaming light of day
but came one night, bringing strange smells, oiled steel
muzzles pointed at their faces, shoved into their empty ears
grunting and groaning in an even more grotesque tongue  
leaving tears and trembling in their wake,
the torn flesh, the wounded wombs, the silken vessels  
meant to be there for the milky planting of tomorrow’s seeds  
not the greedy groping of the interloper’s devilish deeds  
was she asking about that night, the sounds he recalled
like puppies under heavy foot, or worse, like
the madding moaning of his own sister
when someone ripped her open  
not in the distant killing fields
but in the back seat of her car  
not two miles from where they sat  
where he ordered more beer, and
she asked those questions with her silence,
with her eyes, the questions he would never answer  
not after all the beer, in all the free world,
and he was pitifully glad
they served no sushi, in Kiki’s, though
the sharpened knives were there
ready for his confessional
and the raw slaughter of truth
Kiki's is a renown Mexican restaurant in the southwestern US--they serve only Mexican cuisine
Disclaimer--I did not slap my first wife nor sexually assault any Vietnamese children during my tour there--there are, however, people who have done both and this is their woeful tale
spysgrandson Jul 2013
I could not talk him down, or
listen him up,  though that is
what I was trained to do, tried to do  
he gazed only at the street,
his final resting place, where  
he would soon be
a crushed crimson spectacle
for greedy and empty eyes  
whose mouths would tell
of his demise, but none
even knew his name,
I learned it was Everett, and  
that he had three daughters
lost in suburbia, eons from this ledge
where he stood, and talked to a stranger  
who was stranger than he  
for I looked to the skies
above the humming city, as if
they would be my salvation  
an airy home to spread wings
with angels, and glide endlessly
through blue heavens, but Everett knew  
there were no winged saviors awaiting him  
to grab him before his lonely leap
only the unmovable slab of concrete below
the craned necks of other flatlanders  
who would watch his final descent
and not realize his brief eternal fall
through the invisible place between two worlds  
would be the closest any would ever be  
to freedom
as a teen, I often equated death with freedom--seems I have returned to that theme here--Everett was actually the name of a person who was my roommate briefly who later did take his own life
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