I want a baby girl or boy
I know it wont be just a toy
I finally got my chance
But oh your glance
When i joke and say
I think you got me pregnant today
Your stopping me
I want a responsibility
You force me to do it
I tell you and i get hit
I want to keep it but you say no
We should at least give it a chance to grow
I want you to love him or her
This is all going to a big blur
This is way out of proportion
I pretty much had an abortion
Hidden
Bottled up inside
Are the things I never said,
The feelings that I hide,
The lines you never read
You cant see it in my eyes,
Nor read it on my face,
Trapped inside are lies,
Of the past I can't replace

With memories that linger,
And won't seem to go away,
Why can't I be happier?
Today’s a brand new day

Yesterdays are over
Even though the hurting is not,
Nothing lasts forever,
I must cherish what I've got

Don't take my love for granted,
For soon it will be gone,
All you've ever wanted,
Of the love you thought you won

The feelings I have now
Won’t disappear overnight,
But somehow, someway everything will be alright

I'm leaving now
To slay the foe
Fight my battles
High and low

I'm leaving parents
Hear me go
Please wish me luck today

I've grown my wings, I want to fly
Seize my victories where they lie
I'm going guys, but please don't cry
Just let me find my way

I want to see, and touch, and hear,
Though there are dangers, thoughts, and fears,
I'll smile my smiles, and wipe my tears
Please let me speak my say

I'm off to find, my world, my dreams,
Carve my niche, sew my seams
Remember as I sail my seas,
I'll love you all the way

For words i can not speak, my life why should i keep?
you treat me like dust and leave me no where to go but.... lust
but my father is a King  and i belong to him
for he saved my soul and placed a special call
just like a princess protects the land God placed his helping hand
keeping me safe and sound placing a spiritual crown
giving me gifts to give now i know why i should live
not for me but for my father
My King....

In this world full of hurt and pain, I need someone who would help me through the rain. To comfort me when Im sad, Doing everything just to make me glad. In this world I need a Brave Knight, Who would never give up any fight. A knight who would dry away my tears,
Helping me to overcome my fears. A knight who loves me for who I am inside, With him there's nothing more I need to hide. A person who will still be standing strong, Eventhough everything has gone wrong. I need someone who is willing to give me more, Someone I can call my Knight In Shining Armor
No love
sitting here staring at the closed door, i dont even know what for
the thoughts in my head are what make me feel dead, but then i remember its just in my head not what anyones said.
the times at school when u look at me like a fool, the hipster that made me take a fall embarressing me infront of all
its all you that made me like this, stuck here wondering what life is?
round and round the thoughts go, just like the room bellow
the drugs are cause of the lack of hugs, while i do it tough i get no love
while i feel like im drowning in the noon day sun you are all out just having fun
leaving me here to struggle alone my mind blown
stuck in this room feeling so small, and you stand up and walk so tall
confiendent and strong i just smile and play along
fake it til you make it they say well i do everyday! but look where its got me now
here alone in this room eating a thing they call a shroom
it takes away the pang of the day
now its night fall and im not looking as tall
i take it out on those i love and blame it on the drug
i know the morning will come but it wont be any fun
just like any other day i will just lay
staring at the room around and listening to every single sound
freaking out and affraid feeling betrayed
here goes another day wasted and feeling low why dont i say good bye and just fall bellow

An echo of memories that will never die
It doesnt matter how much i try
They reply and will never leave
No matter how slow i breath
Take a look from the outside in
All you'll want to do is grin
But take a look from the inside out
And all you'll be in doubt
Its always about me
And who i want to be
Why dont we change it up a bit
And talk about who'd be fit
Imagine if i fell for him
He is rather thin
Imagine if i fell for that
He is rather fat
Who could be the one?
With him i could have fun
I could call him my own
He'd treat me as if i belong on a throne
Like a princess or a queen
He would never be mean
Its better to feel pain than nothing at all
Out of love with you i just cant fall
He left a hole in my heart but he doesnt care
This time i really think its beyound my repair
My heart broken and no pride
Lost without you and nowhere to hide
Kindness i have lost
I guess ill pay the cost
For now it seems fine
Sit back have a wine
Wine turns to beer
I live in fear
Of having no friends
One day it all ends
The cycle goes round
Then you get found
By the man of your dreams
His hair it gleams
You end up married
Then a boy you carried
You gave birth to him

An echo of memories that will never die
It doesnt matter how much i try
They reply and will never leave
No matter how slow i breath
Take a look from the outside in
All you'll want to do is grin
But take a look from the inside out
And all you'll be in doubt
Its always about me
And who i want to be
Why dont we change it up a bit
And talk about who'd be fit
Imagine if i fell for him
He is rather thin
Imagine if i fell for that
He is rather fat
Who could be the one?
With him i could have fun
I could call him my own
He'd treat me as if i belong on a throne
Like a princess or a queen
He would never be mean
Its better to feel pain than nothing at all
Out of love with you i just cant fall
He left a hole in my heart but he doesnt care
This time i really think its beyound my repair
My heart broken and no pride
Lost without you and nowhere to hide
Kindness i have lost
I guess ill pay the cost
For now it seems fine
Sit back have a wine
Wine turns to beer
I live in fear
Of having no friends
One day it all ends
The cycle goes round
Then you get found
By the man of your dreams
His hair it gleams
You end up married
Then a boy you carried
You gave birth to him

Roses are known as beauty
They have a smell of beauty
And a look of beauty
But no one looks at it's stem before they pick it
You just reach out and grab it
Roses have a smell of beauty
and a look of beauty But bellow that beauty there is pain It comes from a thorn
A thorn ****** you sending a pain through your finger
Falling for the beauty of a rose has a consequence
Falling for a rose is small
But you have to be awware of the things around you
Falling for a rose can lead to falling for a lion
In a child's eyes a lion is a big cat
As you grow older you know that lions ****
Looking through the eyes of a child is dangerous
Grow strong in your eyes as they are how you see
But being weak in your eyes leads to temptations
temptation leads to hurt and pain Look through strong eyes as they are safe

shes only 15 her whole lifes ahead of her
she hates school because the people there discredit her
her boyfriends tries to show thats not how it seems
but everyday she just gets lowered with her self esteem
he lets her know that every night will have a brighter day
she's even tried to overdose and take her life away
shes feeling hopeless there just sitting down beside her bed
then he takes his hand and places it beside her head
he tried to hold her but with every touch she still resists
and then he sees the scars that bury deep within her thigh
shes feeling numb he tries to beg and plead and ask her why
shes says this way i have control of pain i feel inside
nobody seems to get you you feel youre on your own
but listen pretty lady you dont have to be alone
so baby dont cut you can do anything just promise me baby you wont cut
i know your heart is hurting you think the road has ended
you may just feel that blade youre holding is your only friend
but baby dont cut you can do anything
just promise baby you wont cut again
the next day at school shes feeling better than the day before
even cracked a couple smiles as she walked through the corridor
but all that seemed to end as she dropped her books when she walked into class
and every student in the room just seemed to point and laugh
she wouldnt take it anymore
she sent her boy a text she said i love you with my body heart and soul
to death he thought nothing typed i love you then he sent it
by death he didnt know that she had literally just meant it
she ducked her next class ran home into her bathroom
thought to herself she wouldnt break her promise thatt soon 1 cut 2 cut 3 cut 4
the blood started dripping from the tub to the floor
her boyfriend had a feeling in his stomach that he hated
he followed it and ran down to her house he never waited
the front door was open he heard the water running
he stormed into the bathroom and he's heart just started gunning
he put her arm around his shoulder he just tryin to lean her back up
yelling out her name as he lays her beside the bathtub
he feels his whole world jusy took a hit from and avalanche
he screaming out so heavily somebody call an abulance
feeling mad angry like somebody let her on to this
her eyeballs are rolling drifting out of consciousness
thinking to himself why the hell didnt she just stop
at will the tears just keeping on rolling as they head to the hospital
paramedics rush her in doctor calls emergency
shes loosed a lot of blood the place is looking like a ****** scene
an hour later the doc walks over with a sour face
and says excuse for the words that im about to say
im sorry for your loss the boy just starts collapsing
his own girl his own world just took a crashing
saying to himself that its his fault and that he let it up
baby i thought you made a promise you would never cut

You stare at me with empty eyes
As you pull your hand away from my thighs
You look at me in despair
We were the perfect pair
Looking at you now
I dont know how
Your face so slim
Feeling empty within
Did you really love me?
Should i flea?
Stick around and plea?
Why did you do this to me?
These are questions
Causing me aggression
Its just hard to show my expression
When you look at me like this
All i want to do is kiss
But i know it couldnt be that bliss
Standing with the gun, Why do i feel like the only one?
I think im almost done, Do i pull it or run?
They say run its more fun, But time shall only see
What i might be, Dead or alive i plea
I wish you'd get on one knee and ask "will you marry me"
I remember that time, Standing in a line
I caught your eye, I sent a message but no reply
I always try, But really why should I?
Goodbye family and friend, This is truly the end
Its for me not you, Im sorry to be like this but its true
I truely loved you....Goodbye this is the end.

Cinderella, why do you wish to be pretty?
What you have is called inner beauty
I’m not giving you my pity

Cinderella, Why don’t you stand up to those snobs?
They are garbage compared to you
The people who rob
End up blue

Cinderella, Why don’t you take what’s yours?
And not just dust either
Stop doing those chores

Cinderella, Why don’t you go out?
Not as a maid but who you really are
Go a different route
You will shine like a star

Cinderella, why don’t you let the beauty out?
The prince will like you for you
Go out and about
Forget the glass shoe

Cinderella, why don’t you forget its midnight?
Show the prince who you really are
You wont win without a fight
I’m telling you shine like star

Be yourself not someone else Cinderella, why do you wish to be pretty?
What you have is called inner beauty
I’m not giving you my pity

This is an insight to my life
All I want is to be a wife
Chill and be free
With someone who loves me
If I could id live in a tree
Weird I know but this is me!
Get to know me or learn to hate me
It’s not my fault I wish I could flee
This not who I want to be
Some clone like I am now
I want to escape but I don’t know how
For now I stay at school
Being looked at like a fool
But hey at least I’m not a tool
Some would say
Well your wrong anyway
I get used every day
Stuck in the same old circle
Getting beaten blue and purple
My user silent but deadly
Same old same old he should really fine a new medley
At least I know what to expect
Then again it has the same after effect
No one knows and knows hears
Except for the occasional tears
But they get blamed on something like fears
No one seems to listen
My face it manages to glisten
Hiding away all the fear
Of what I wish could to appear
I’ve never seen his face before
Only his silhouette on my door
I’m sure if I saw his shadow
I’d get a shiver like when he touches me
Just above my left knee
He says calm down
Or we will have to move out of town
I wish I didn’t have to go
But I bet one day he will make me follow
If I disappear you now know why
I’m sure I won’t die
Good bye if I do
I really loved you

Love seen through your eyes, I sit and believe your lies
Lies for sure I know, but I never let it show
I gave you my all, and you let me fall
Your telling me to be free, but I don’t want to be
All I do is try, I may as well die
Deep within or not so far down, I think I deserve a crown
For all ive faced, and that time I misplaced
They think I have it easy, but they don’t know about evie
My little girl I brought to life, before I was a wife
Letting her go was hard, I put up a guard
All the things my little girl would’ve seen, all she could’ve been
My poor evie rose, imagine her toes
The things id do for just one hold, before I grow to old

Its better to feel pain than nothing at all
out of love with you I just cant fall
This times I really think its beyond my repair
I feel its quiet unfair
My heart broken, no pride
Lost without you and nowhere to hide
Kindness I have lost
I guess ill pay the cost
For now it seems fine
Sit back have a wine
wine turns to beer
I live in fear  
Of having no friends
One day it all ends
The cycle goes round
'Then you are found
By the man of your dreams
His hair it gleams
You end up married
Then a boy you carried
You gave birth to him
You smile and grin
I was left with no one
And his heart i have won

I ne'er was struck before that hour with love so sudden and so sweet,
his face bloomed like a sweet flower and stole my heart away complete
My face turned pale as deadly pale,
my legs refused to walk away,
and then he looked, what could i ail?
my life and all seemed to turn to day
and then my blood rushed to my face
and took my eyesight quite away
the trees and bushes around the place
seemed midnight and noonday
i could not see a single thing
words from my eyes did start -
they spoke as chords do from the string
and blood burnt around my heart
are flowers the winters choice?
is love's bed always snow?
he seemed to hear my silent voice
not loves appeals to know
i never saw so sweet a face
as that i stood before
my heart has left its dwelling place
and can return no more

Although im not their mother
I care for them each day
I cuddle sing and read to them
And watch them as they play
I see each new accomplishment
I help them grow and learn
I understand ttheir language
I listen with concern
They come to me for comfort
I kiss away the tears
They proudly show their work to me
I give the loudest cheers
No im not their mother
But my role just as strong
I nurture then and keep them safe
Though maybe not for long
I know someday the time will come
When we will have to part
But i know each child i cared for
Is forever in my heart!

"Just get over it" they say, I wish I could find a way
living with it day by day, with memories that just wont go away
Darkness is where I belong, I was doomed all along.
How many people have I torn down? How many friends have I beaten to the ground?
Even though I tried my best to stop the pain, Somehow it still came.
I never meant to betray anyone, I will never be able to forgive what I've done.
Now as my life starts to come to its end, I try as hard as I can just to find a friend.
But everyone always leaves me forgotten, They all think that I'm so rotten.
They all left me stranded, So now I lie, hurt, dying, and abandoned.
They all know what I've done, But only I know what I've become.
There is only one light that seems to glow, A light that might finally show me the way I must go.
I've been lost in the darkness for so long, I can no longer tell right from wrong.
I know that you're the one who could save my life, Please be the one to block the deadly knife.
My wounds won't seem to heal, And my life no longer seems real.
I'm not going to ask you for much, I only want to feel your touch.
I want to know that I can still feel, That there might be a chance for me to heal.
You have to help me before my soul is gone, All I need is a shoulder to cry on.
Please, save me from myself, I know that this might be my second chance.
I need to wake from this trance, I need someone to hold me and never let me go.
I have become my worst, and most deadly foe I just want someone who will accept me for who I am.
I know you're the only one who would understand. But time is running short, And this is my last resort
.
But will I ever have the courage to tell you how I feel? Will my fantasy ever become real.
I know your the one, because we're the same.You the one to save me from the pain.
Save me from the monster I've become, So I can forget what I've done.
I know you'll accept me, despite my faults. I'm about to dance my last waltz.
But if you were the one to ask me to dance, I'd know I'd have gained my second chance.
I know you're the one, please, I beg, quickly before I pull the trigger on the gun
I need to find something fun, before im done, And soon it shall be if you don't set me free.

Lately it's been hard to comprehend
The fact that I cannot defend
Every ounce of blood I shed
is just to keep up with that smile like where did all those feelings end
it goes heart thump - its beating fast
Lungs pump those trees and ash
Maybe we can go to a far away place but you simply know it's you and me at last
Wow
Then I feel you blow it in my face
Those peter blues got me thinking you've made all of these ignorant mistakes
Like your ex-man - no wolverine
Up and left your side for a European
Chick with her hair slicked back and you feel you need to drop a size or two in jeans
No
I think you're beautiful in every way
And if you take my hand I guarantee we'll search for better days
I've had it rough, You've had it rougher
We'll fight and argue, But we have each other
And understand that no one else can do you better, through these measures
Still together, Me and You the two forever.

I feel an emotion one i dont feel often
Most of the time wishing i was in a coffin
But the feeling has finally soften
Looking around the room
What if your my groom
Marrage is a my wish
Something i want to acomplish
But with who?
My result is overdue
Looking and waiting
Drawing writing and painting
All things i do to pass time
While i just wait in this line
Secretly i want it to be arranged
Most people think its strange
But judgement plays a big role
My legs take the toll
I have no say
I live happy until this day
The day i have to choose
The one i hope to never loose
Stay by my side
Lay with me by the tide
Your cowboy ****
Makes me got nuts
But is it you i choose
What about your friend with the tattoos?
We all have diffferent veiws
My husband i shall choose
I like him with the bruise
Tall and handsome
And looks fairly wholesom
Marry me
I plea
And we will live happily

Days to long
Waiting to be proved wrong
Nights to long
Im not that strong
Your to late
I couldnt wait
Death to long
I got proved wrong
Life to long
I guess i am strong
Your to late
I can relate
All about understanding
As now im not withstanding

It was awkward and grim
Together i felt alone siting with him
We watched a movie tonight
No we didnt fight
It was something previous
Together we got mischevious
We played around
No we werent found
It was then we lay
Together we began to play
We were stupid and wrong
No it didnt last long
It would've been the end
Together we wouldnt be a friend
We came close to the brink
No i dont know what he think
It would be nice
Together we awkwardly eat rice
We dont talk about it
No we dont want to admit
It would be weird
Together its both feared
We will never know
No i wont ever go that low
It would be nice though
Together we would go to and frow
We could live together
Know that id make it forever

kiss me and make the pain go away
kiss me and tell me everything will soon be okay

kiss me and hold me tightly close to you
kiss me and whisper sweet words that are true

kiss me and and lay me on the bed
kiss me from my toes to my head

kiss me here and kiss me there
kiss me all over and anywhere

kiss me softly
and kiss me hardly

kiss me from ear to ear
kiss me after you wipe my tear

kiss me kiss me kiss me more
if you can't do that let me through the door

Lonely are the nights
Lonely are the days
Lonely am I, in so many ways

Lonely are the seasons
Lonely are the years
Lonely am I, that it brings tears.

Lonely is this place
Lonely is my life
Lonely am I, that I reach for a knife

Lonely is this bedroom
Lonely is my sentence
Lonely am I that I ask for repentance

I can see your smile
I could see it from a mile
Your eyes dark and on fire
Your hiding and a liar
Be true to yourself
It effects your health
I never thought I'd get through
I know how it feels to be blue
But baby I care
I know it's not fair
I wish you'd understand
This was all planned
Sometimes we get lost
And we pay the cost
All in different ways
We get lost in a haze
There's a reason to continue
And it turns to mildew
Finally coming out
Then your in drought
No more haze or mildew
finally we are through

As I saw beyond the disguise, I knew that she could one
As I watched her break down, I knew that she was in need
As my smile turned to a frown, I knew that she is all I o talk to her, the words I could not speak
As she said yes sir, her loe it made me weak
As I watched her do life, I prayed that she'd be mine
As she became my wife, I melted like hocolate oh so divine
As I give her my love, she can always see
As I thank the Lord above, she will always have me

Mirror mirror on the wall
Why must i be so tall and slim
Mirror mirror on the wall
I dont even go to the gym
Mirror mirror on the wall
Why do i look like waist
Mirror mirror on the wall
Im so shrunk and defaced
Mirror mirror on the wall
Why do i have a double chin
Mirror mirror on the wall
I just wanna grin
Mirror mirror on the wall
Why do you lie to my face
Mirror mirror on the wall
Making me displaced
Mirror mirror on the wall
Why do i have no friends
Mirror mirror on the wall
Im looking through your lens
Mirror mirror on the wall
Why do you say fairest of them all?
Mirror mirror your a ****** fibber
Why are you even hanging on my wall

Have you ever looked in the mirror and wondered what you've seen?
Or maybe even who you could've been?
If you didnt make that choice
Or you spoke up and used your voice

Have you ever looked in the mirror and wondered what you've seen?
Thought you saw an allien
Screamed and run from what you saw
Wished you had an excuse like you hit a door
Have you ever looked in the mirror and wondered what you've seen?
Wishing you could see the unforseen
To know your future and what it holds
Not have to wait til it unfolds
Have you ever looked in the mirror and wondered what you've seen?
Wish you could be clean
Of all your sin
Maybe even squeeze out a grin
Have you ever looked in the mirror and wondered what you've seen?
Just wanted to scream
Scream and hide
From what was inside
Have you ever looked in the mirror and wondered what you've seen?
Wished nothing had come between
We were the best together
Wish it could last forever
I looked in the mirror one day
Wishing i could go away
The days that went wrong
I've never been that strong
I looked in the mirror one day
Wishing i didnt know what i weigh
Ive never been the same
ith no one to blame
I looked in the mirror one day
Wishing i knew the way
Didnt have to risk it
Knowing even a bit
I looked in the mirror one day
Realised what was on display
Who i really was and am
No one knows except them
I looked in the mirror one day
Thinking who are they
My friends that i trust
Not fall for with lust

Let me die
Where i lye
Held beneth the water
I was their daughter
Head pushed under
The roaring thunder
Hear the sounds
Breath slows down
Slowly loosing air
They really dont care
Hair wrapped around my face
Whats this funny taste
The waters salty
My body faulty
Lungs so full
Feeling the pull
Getting dragged up
I see a cup
Lying in a bed
This is my dread
Ive been saved
I wish i was enslaved
I wouldnt have a friend
Meaning i woulnt have to do it again
Its times like this
That i just wish
I could do an act
And never come back

For your sickness is my joy
I get to sit back and enjoy
As I watch the devil fail
As he tries to take over with an ail
Why? I don't understand
But I know God has the master plan
He comforts he when I hurt
devil your nothing but dirt
My father is King!
devil you equal nothing

I’ve tried to make this life my own
To find myself, I’ve searched alone
To let love go and let it in
I found myself burning in sin
What have i got myself in?
Round and round in circles i've been
Where do i even begin?
I myself am far to thin
For weeks nothing has passed my chin
I keep up a fake grin but something has to pay
My skin parting as the knife slowly drains life
The blood dripping as the pang of the pain hit
Feeling an emotion hurts just a bit
I know that emotions dont come easy
This makes me feel a bit uneasy
Like i almost regret
As my life stands still in threat
Why cant life just finish yet
Its about me now i need a rest
Is this all part of your major test?
If so im failing and
Im really thinking of bailing
This isnt really easy sailing
I thought life would be easier than this
No i know its not all bliss
But just know that im all over this!

The wind in the trees came to a hault
This time it was all your fault
The air became brutally cold
You is who i want to hold
Your eyes glimmer sweet and softly
This is when i fall in love instantly
No wonder the wind took a break
This was not some form of fate
This has to be planned
By some women or a man
Our eyes could not have met more perfect
I look down whilst thinking im not worth it
As he talks he sends out a breeze
That sends shivers and makes you freeze
He stares waiting for an answer
But it comes out with a stammer
He leans his head forward with the perfect angle
Then asks "excuse me" like an angel
There must be a God above
He was sent here by a dove
Cause this man could not be more perfect
Im starting to think im worth it
But am i just silly and confused
ill i end up hurt and abused
Someone can not be as handsome as him
And not be mean and nasty with in
But you are wrong
Well i guess it hasnt been long
For now everythings perfect
And me maybe i am worth it

You pressure me to do things i never wanted
Then i live my life haunted
You just want me to flaunt
Then when i dont you taunt

Feeling the pressure
I dont know the measure
So i just go
Until your about to blow
***** i know
But he just doesnt take it slow
He's got lots of dough
So i guess ill be his ***

For words i can not speak, my life why should i keep?
Happieness and grace have left there usual place,
Now hiding behind my face, all i feel is numb and dumb.
I love you til death shall take my last breathe, but for now i hide along with my pride.
Sorry if i ever lied,  but you treat me like dust then all i have left is "lust"
My dying heart makes us part
Eyes tightly shut, why do i miss out on love?
For my prince has not come left to wait with only one mate
A true friend not just a passing trend.
Who knows when it will be the end
But til then all i can do is pretend

The blades have tasted blood, and it was surely mine
The venom torments me, with memories divine
Plagued with distrust, it begins to rot my mind
Voices start to taunt, love i'll never find
Constant realization, everything was pretend
Efforts proved worthless, a failure in the end
Ashamed of having tried, hearts never mend
Now what do I do, I've lost my only friend
Hiding behind a fake face, Ive lost my usual place
Fear then takes, my body begins to shake
Love i've lost, now im paying the cost
Waiting for the right person, why am i hurtin?
I  begin to blame, wishing i wasnt in pain
I know it was me, but why does it have to be?
Im asking questions, and not getting an answer
I become a dancer, then he gets hit with cancer
Please Lord why? he isnt even a bad guy
Why cant it be i, i deserve
im the one that took the curve
He did nothing wrong, but i have all along
This is my prayer, that i suffer
This honestly couldnt get any tougher
Just as i think this, there goes that slight bliss
The little bit of light, i loose its sight
Hiding behind my face, i try to embrace
I dont even have one friend, thats when i begin to cut again
The blades enjoy as i endure, i wish i couldve just stayed pure.

Do you ever feel like a ***?
Like you've got no where to go?
You dont know what to do?
Why does this sound so true?
The feeling is it shame?
The result is it pain?
Do you wish for a cuddle?
Even to stand next to him in a huddle?
Has he ever said forever?
And you thought "yeah more like never"

Your reflection staring right back at you
You have to wonder is what your looking at true
All the lies you may have told
All the secrets that you hold
Deep inside they hide
What you see you cant describe
Sometimes i deny that its me
Who's staring back looks so free
Is it me im looking at
Is it me who's looking fat
Somedays i dont recognise myself
Whats with my eyes and my health
The past left its footprint
When i just wanted to sprint
Things i cant forget
Things you wont get
But the past is behide us
Thats why we can trust
But trust me i wouldn't
I tried myself but couldn't
It all comes down
To when you turned around
And saw someone else
Not me or myself
Staring in my reflection
Feeling the rejection

My stomach churning
Scared your returning
Cold shivers down my spine
As the blade leave a line
This time ill go through
If it turns out true
Sacrifice for another
Be a real mother
Must i stay with him
Through everything
It would be right by my child
But he or she just mild
Compared to God the judge
Im glad he doesnt hold a gruge
Ready for this am i
But emotionally i still cry
When i said i wanted a baby
I didnt mean spill your gravy
I know what lifes worth
Because i look beyound the earth
I know what is right
But i still fight
In a way i hope this is true
But deep down i still feel blue
My baby i will do all i can
I dont even have to pretend
For you i will sacrifice
My whole life

Dark red
Trickles
Trickles down her arm
A special little secret
Known as self harm

Fiery red
Anger
Builds up deep inside
She's got to let these feelings out
But to who can she confide

Dark silver
Blade
Is the one that she trusts
The one that she turns to
When life becomes too much

Long white
Sleeves
To cover her pain
Hide her relief
Hide the cuts again

Each note i play my touch gets stronger, my fingers begin to lingure on the keys longer and longer.
Your eyes capturing me as my heart grows fonder, i just let my mind wonder as i ponder.
what is love to me? do i want to capture you or let you be?
hold you tight through the night or let you go out and fight.
life gets tough and it may seem rough, but its your time to learn ive had my turn.
life can be like a knife, you can get yourself into strife
But be strong find yourself a wife
whos nice and you will see that life can be better without me
this is my time to set you free

His eyes draw me near
They capture my heart
My body filled with fear
We have a magic spark
As we lye and look
Closer his drew
Leave i should
But stay i do
Grasped in his tender arm
His touch keeping me calm
Its like a winter frost
His eyes glisten
Like the dew
I could sit and listen
I wish he knew

Misstreating your corpse
Is sin
But i was forgiven
Scared of the dark
He stands in the corner
Looking like a foreighner
He motions me to come near
His face very unclear
Standing in the dark
His completly stark
As he walks near
I begin to hear
His voice speak and say
"Why dont we play"
Affraid and scared
I was unpreapared
For what came next
I would never have dared
Left lying there
As he sits in the chair
Theres a feeling in the air
Unhappy and sad
What just happened was bad
Knowing you just want me naked
I completely faked it

Snow white said when i was young
My prince would come
So i wait
For that date
It still hasnt come
This isnt very fun
Hearts breaking
Everyone faking
Snow white lied
I've tried
But ive never found my prince charming
I guess his out farming
Somewhere all alone
Probably without a phone
Ill never get to meet you
And get my glass shoe
A slipper on my a heel
I guess ill never feel
Because you dont excist
Life couldnt be that bliss
I guess ill find someone that will do
But he will never be as good as you

My name it means nothing, my fortune is less
My furture is shrouded, in dark wilderness.
Sunshine is far away, clouds linger on
everything i posses now it is gone
where can i go to?
and, what can i do?
nothing can please me, my thoughts are of you.
crying and thinking; is all i can do,
memories i have remind me of you...

In this dream i tried
In this dream i died
In life everyone tries
In life everyone dies
In my mind im trying
In my mind im dying
We will all try  
We will all die
Its not up to us to see
Its not up to us to be
Someone we are not
Someone we forgot
Someone we met
Someone we kept
Its not our plans
As we hold hands
Its not our plans
As we catch trams
Its not our plans
As we lye in a trance
Its someone elses
Not myself
Its someone elses
Its someone's health
Its someones wealth
Its someone's stealth
We just live their life
Trying to stay out of strife

I want to go back in time
And fix all that was wrong
Change all of my regret
So we didn't fight as long

The regrets are what f**ked it up
And they were all my fault
I was so immature
I should of acted like an adult

I broke my own heart
When I walked out on you
Now it's too late
And I can't undo

I still love you
But no-body knows
We are no longer together
Because of what I chose

It was a bad decision
And now I want you here
Never far away
Always near

So please take me back
And catch me when I fall
Cause I need you right now
More than anything at all

I never meant you any harm, my tears feel warm on my forearm
Close my eyes for a little while, forced from the world a peaceful smile
Keeping my head up, my tears fall down making mud
In the dirt they lye, i ask mysef why?
Trying to hold back, im wondering what i lack
Whats the purpose of being here, i live in absolute fear
Lower my thoughts go, soon i will follow
The blades cutting my skin, Oh how im awhfully thin
Food hasnt passed my chin, as i feel empty within
My heart drops, as i feel the teardrops.

The hidden mystery
That our lives hold
All the secret history
Wondering leaves me cold
Who knows what poeple hide
Her growing up
Or when she became a bride
Was she corput?
The history of ones heart
If you look, its soft
But look again, be smart
Its cold as the winter frost
Look in her eyes
Beauty and love
But the scars on her thighs
she's not tough
Her heart cold like the frost
But her thighs scared in love
Why is this? was she lost?
Maybe given hope by a dove
This is the history
Hidden in her
Showing her sanity

The mystery of people and why there so harsh
Well really i have no idea you shouldnt have asked
I can make an assumption
Something nonsense
But assuming make me no better than them
Excuse me for this but they act ten
Picking at anything they possibly can
People assume that even i am dumb
And look at me as if im ****
But i bet if they read this they woulnt know
That i myself wrote this and myself i have 2 outgrow
To come up with words like this in my vocabulary
Must me i have some kind of intergraty
Yes my punctuation and spelling may be off
But do you really have to pick and scoff
This my friends is why i hate people
Be smart and get called geeky
You can not win play dumb to be cool
And get treated and looked at like a fool
My friends and enemies i am smart far beyound you
This may be false or true
You can decide its up to you
But if its not true
Do not commment just stand by
Speaking out of term is as bad as a lie

All I do is cry and weep
For some reason I can not sleep
I know deep down why
But I keep it hidden behind a lie
There’s a lump in my throat
As I even sat and I wrote
To think about this
Its hard to resist
All the thoughts that creep in
Its like im foreign  
I gave you love a whole heap
And hatred and loss is what I reap
Not understanding why
I lay confused and cry
For sometimes things don’t make sense
Anticipating something back I lay in suspense
Every night afraid
Remember when I got played
It started A domino effect
I guess it does reflect

Love seen through your eyes, I sit and believe your lies
Lies for sure I know, but I never let it show
I gave you my all, and you let me fall
Your telling me to be free, but I don’t want to be
All I do is try, I may as well die
Deep within or not so far down, I think I deserve a crown
For all ive faced, and that time I misplaced
They think I have it easy, but they don’t know about evie
My little girl I brought to life, before I was a wife
Letting her go was hard, I put up a guard
All the things my little girl would’ve seen, all she could’ve been
My poor evie rose, imagine her toes
The things id do for just one hold, before I grow to old

When i think of you
It makes me blue
When i lye in bed
Thinking in my head
Why is it so dark
I want to go to the park
With you i want to play
With you i want to stay  
Its not your fault
But why do you have to be an adult
Sometimes i wish i was her
I wish i wasnt such a nerd
Or maybe thats what he wants
Someone dumb a blonde
If i could travel with you i would
But i know i cant but i wish i could

I etch marks in my skin whenever he  touches me, In the places where his hands wondrously wander as if to erase the feelings he once gave me