Jan 3 sommerlawrence
strong>I lived.
Before I met you,
I just lived my life.
I lived for books
and rainy nights.
I lived and took on
one day at a time.
I lived but I
get lonely sometimes.
Then I met you,
I lived with happines
by my side.
I lived with excitement
all the time.
I lived with purpose
in life.

I loved.
I loved living life.
I loved having you
by my side.
I loved the endless calls
and sleepless nights.
I loved you being there
when I get nightmares.
I loved every moment
that we shared.
I loved for the
first time in my life.
And I know,
I'm going to love you
for the rest of my life.

I lost.
I lost my perspective
and my will to live.
I lost my motivation
and the fight in me.
I lost the love of my life.
I lost you
and honestly?
I lost my happiness,
I feel like dying
every second that
passes by.

I died.
I died. I hurt. I feel.
I died. I cry. I scream.
I will die.
I die in deep slumber.
I die in endless sorrow.
I died when you left.
Silence in death.
Now all I know is
I'm dead.
alcohol bottles flood the room where we used to lay
because you took hold of my heart and said you would stay.
I don’t know if it was the blue in your eyes, but I believed every word
I mean I’m not sure why, really its absurd.

It didn’t last long till I did see, what kind of woman
you would make of me.
All the lies you told me, I repeated in my head
Tossing and turning every night in bed.
watching you lie there, asleep or awake you did it so well.
I didn’t realise all the hurt you could cause me before I fell.
sommerlawrence Nov 2017
I know you look for me in a crowd, hoping to see my face, against all odds. I know you think of me, hoping the thoughts will go away, but they won’t. I know you still love me, I mean I hope you still love me, against all odds, I won’t go away, do you still love me?
  Jul 2017 sommerlawrence
You're like smoke.
You take my breath away
You numb the ache
But i can't hold you
I don't want to let you go
But I'm not holding on
If you'd rather be gone
Like smoke on a midnight breeze
Darling, won't you stay?
Ramblings because I am a fuck
  Jul 2017 sommerlawrence
I used to disagree
With Frost
I believed that ice would be our end
But you have kindled me
Heap of ashes that i am
And now. I know
Because I feel desire
That my world will end
In fire
Because my world ends
With you.
sommerlawrence Jul 2017
My stomach grumbling though my hand shall not reach my plate, I've let my self go backwards I don't know how to get out of this state. I want to be bones living or dead ill get there because the voices don't leave my head.
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