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mila splawska Jul 18
i imagine you kissing her
and i am filled with dread
i imagine you ******* her
and i wish i was dead
mila splawska Jul 18
you changed
and
i no longer know how to love you
i'm slowly learning that most people
want only my attention
not my heart

i
guess
it was too hard to handle
mila splawska Jul 18
the smell of you lingers
but only for so long
i wish it’d stay forever
suddenly





                                  it’s gone
mila splawska Jul 18
i want you
i need you
your messy cigarette- smelling hair
your aura, the way you just don’t care
the dark, thick clothes you wear
the drinks you down when you feel you belong nowhere

maybe it’s because i think i can save you?
even though i know i won’t ever be able to change you

you’re dangerous, a little lethal
and i am weak for you
  Jul 17 mila splawska
nishta
she was chai
exotic and thrilling.
i was addicted
drowning in her spices
her taste overwhelming me
engulfing me
but while i craved her
wanted her
she could never fulfil
the thirst in me.

i am parched
and i have no water.
chai=tea
mila splawska Jul 17
and in those 23 seconds
i could not breath or think or speak
astounded with my inability to be
ok without you
i’m suspended in time
trying to change reality
you left me
and i have no more words for you
except to say
i imagined fashioning my pain into some sort of weapon
but only for those 23 seconds
and then i recalled that
i still love you
and i could never hurt you
oh but how i want to
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