3 words that were the tornado,
obliterating all
into clean and tidy rubble.

Ordered, perfect, succinct
as your wicked fault-lines
imploded and I said

you were doing the right
thing, I just did not want
you to do it.

My eye of the storm, departed
crumpled
because I could not, though

I swear, calling bare, blood
burning, desperate, destitute nights
and each sharpened, salted day

as my witness, I tried.

But this body holds no words, this mind
carries no ease to destruction, incessant
heart beats out no explanation of why

why? why? why,

I cannot love you.

you looked at me and i forgot how to
breathe me in like you're suffocating and i am made of
air just doesn't seem necessary without
you were the best thing that ever happened to

me without you is completely
meaningless was my life before you walked
in came the love and with it came
pain is inevitable but i thought we were

too much pain, too much fighting, too much
stress does not a healthy relationship
make me remember why i fell in
love me like there's no

tomorrow i'm afraid i'll wake up and you won't be
there is never a right time to say
goodbyes are hard and i refuse to let you
leave now and i swear you will never see me

again.

i love you but i swear to god you will never see me
again i let you in my
doors never stay shut for
long periods without you make my skin

crawl away but you'll always come back to
me without you is completely
meaningless is this stop-and-go cycle of back and
fourth time's the charm, right?

wrong.

i need you but i know you're bad for
me without you is becoming a
possibilities are endless and i think i will be
okay is nice but passion is

better without you and better for
it will be okay, i
promise me forever and proceed to walk
away with with you, away with the

memories hurt me more than you ever
did you really love me or was it just a
games are fun but i need something
serious relationships are hard and neither of us are to

blame me and i'll blame
you will always be the one who got
away with you, away with
missing you hurts me more than you ever did.

so. much.

goodbyes are hard but i'm forcing you to
leave now and maybe it will hurt
less is more when it comes to you and
me without you is exactly what we

need.

I am not dead.
Ha!
I ache.
I curl into a fist.

...Ashes to ashes...
A single, calcified tear.
You heard me.
...The darkness...

Clambake!

Inside a dream, inside a dream, inside a dream.
Don't pet the cat that way.
You sent this to me in your sleep.
DO YOU HEAR ME SAYING NOTHING?
...Nothing.
The end.

Sometimes I forget why.
I forget why I’m here, as if there was a reason at some point.
I forget where I’m going, where I’m from, why thats even important.
And I find myself full up
with this feeling
this lingering, ever looming feeling
that makes me want to burst from the seams of my skin.
And inside that feeling is total emptiness. The darkest of darks
I feel it when I sit in a puddle of myself surrounded by walls
When I am alone with others. Always, always.
I don’t know if it is the world wanting in or me wanting out
I don’t know if they can see it or feel it in my presence
Or if they have it too.
Desperately, I wish it was anomalous.
The feeling goes away temporarily, with distractions
Art, music, a taste of affection
and then I feel the shadow
and there it is again.

I love the way you talk out of the side of your mouth, like you could somehow reel the words you say back in,
throw out a line, before it's too late.
I wrap my arms around you before you can react and it's just my way of saying that
I love the syllables, the speech that softens your expression,
the fox-light in your eyes
and your curved lips on mine.

I never loved you

I never even really liked you that much

You were just a boy that was there, that was nice

That’s all just a boy

I just wanted to be a girl

I wanted us to be like leeches, like parasites

We get what we wanted and then fall off

And that’s what I did but you

You refused to leave, you grew attached

you said it’s over you said I’m done

But you were the one that wasn’t leaving

And when I did you followed me

You aren’t a very good leech

I love you
And that's the problem
I will eventually hurt you
I will disappoint you
I will make you cry
It's not that I mean to
It's truly an accident
Love causes pain
That's why I wanted to tell you
I'm Sorry
Even if I haven't hurt you yet
I eventually will