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sky isabelle Jul 2018
i hate growing up in an age
where it's normal to constantly put yourself down
and make a joke out of it.

anxiety is romanticized
like it's somehow "cool"
to struggle with a mental illness.

if you don't hate yourself,
it's unusual.
they tell you to stop being so full of yourself.

i'm really trying to love myself.
i didn't know it would be this hard.
my mind keeps insisting i'm not
good enough for this world.

so the only thing i can rely on is
the hope of a brighter future
away from the place i'm in now.

far, far away.
sky isabelle Jul 2018
for the first time in my life
i'm motivated to do well
to be better
to make a name for myself
to live a life full of purpose
and i'm so ready
to start the next chapter
sky isabelle Jul 2018
it's 4:49 am.
i should be sleeping,
but the thunder outside
is insisting i pry my eyes open.

my dog is terrified of thunder.
he's a rescue animal, so we don't know why.
all i know is that every storm i hold him
as he cries and shakes like a leaf.

everyone has their storm,
as solid as they may seem.
even the strongest of people have moments
that make them vulnerable.

when someone opens up to you,
you can either help them with their storm
or use it against them.
i always comfort them.

people ruin things you really used to love,
don't they?
not everyone has the best intentions.
they don't want to see you succeed.

and it's sad that out of all the emotions
they could have,
spite and jealousy is what they
choose to feel.

i'm rambling now, sorry.
being awake at 4:49 am means
my mind is always in a deep place.
it's hard to not think about the pain in the world.

it's 5:05 am now.
i think i'm going to go to sleep.
sky isabelle Jun 2018
how can i go from
happiness to sadness
in a minute
i feel like nothing is right
and it makes me physically sick
that i am the way i am
a waste of space
who comes into people's lives
and clings to them
as if i have no respect
for myself
compromising myself to please
people i don't even like
sky isabelle Jun 2018
we let our emotions linger
as subjects for our next verse
left unchecked for too long
we don't realize that they're drowning us
sky isabelle Jun 2018
i feel trapped inside my own head
i truly believed i was healing
but now i feel the most conflicted i ever have
i tried so hard to escape the reality of my situation
that i ended up falling deeper into my mind
i won't give up
i swear, if it's the last thing i do
i'll make it out of here
my mind is my biggest obstacle
it watches my heart shatter forever
inspired by billie eilish & khalid - "lovely"
sky isabelle Jun 2018
i grew up into a world that judges people
based off of shallow observations
choosing to ignore someone's inner beauty
in favor of insulting their appearance
self-love is taught to be rare, unusual, and selfish
i wake up each day in a body that feels wrong
in a mind that feels sick
everyone around me is either comfortable in their own skin
or the best **** actor i've ever seen
they've seemed to reach a point of self-acceptance
that i only graze in my dreams
why can't i just be like everyone else?
i start each day with the thought
of how nice it would be if i could be anyone else but me
inspired by billie eilish - "idontwannabeyouanymore"
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