You want to feel,
You cut yourself,
You want to taste,
You drink alcohol,
You want to hear,
You listen to yelling,
You want to see,
You watch ****,
You don't want to feel,
You leave with drugs,
You don't want to taste,
You starve yourself,
You don't want to hear,
You yell back,
You don't want to see,
You sleep.

You want to feel,
You experience human warmth,
You want to taste,
You kiss the one you love,
You want to see,
You look into their eyes,
You want to hear,
Sweet nothings.

I believe in the power of determination,
To overcome anything with little frustration,
Then the amazing feeling of succession brings elation,
Continuing confidence with progressive confirmation,
Although the glory might seem hard to perceive,
Whatever it is, it's easy to achieve,
With the right mentality,
This I believe.

Use the strange abstractions,
and temporarily use distractions,
which creates a sudden reaction,
temporarily forgetting attractions,
to people that meet your satisfaction,
but don't like your inaction,
cause you're a social freak that can't have a normal ******* interaction.

I really love her, but she really loves him,
And he doesn't love her, but just likes her slim body that will do anything on his **** command,
But I love her for her, she's the fairest in the land,
She takes me to her home to become so intimate,
She reaches her limit but my love is limitless,
She labels me as son and asks me to call her mom,
Strange fetish or excuse to snuggle, either way brings me to ROM,
The
Realm
Of
Madness,
That's where I'm stuck right now,
Stuck in between her way of life and the Tao,
Remaining friends and never anything less,
Hopefully more than friends if I make progress,
But I am not the one getting touchy feely here,
Because I don't want to make her uncomfortable or fear me,
Because I might drop,
From my current spot,
And lose the trust I've earned,
The whole entire lot,
So I say ***** love,
***** life,
I don't want to die,
I just don't want to exist,
I can see through the mist,
Wrote down reasons to live,
It was a small list,
Why must my breathing persist...

I've been floating through life in the middle of the ocean,
Looking for other fish while I'm questioning my notions,
I find myself a pink fish that starts to play with my emotions,
These waves used to be calm but now they're causing commotion,
Intimate, then not,
Dedicate my thoughts,
To a furry thot,
That hasn't yet caught,
The fact that I am in love,
With her and raise her above,
The tide of loneliness to breathe,
Why is it so hard to perceive.

The pink fish darkened to red,
Then slit her wrists till they bled,
Stained with the thought of being ugly,
But she's beautiful and snuggly,
And kind and spreads good vibes,
But she tells herself these lies,
That leads to depression,
And sometimes aggression,
Whether she's conscious of the way she makes me feel or not,
I'll deal with things the same way, living out the plot.

She took a part of me that I can't retrieve,
How in the hell could I be so naive,
Maybe cause she put my feeble mind at ease,
In the end it was just one great ol' tease,
I was lost in the feeling of feeling pleased,
I never thought that such events would cease,
Like walking through green meadows feeling the breeze,
Like kissing me while she's on her knees,
Every day going home depressed and crying,
This stuff sounds fake but I am not lying,
They say, "Do Better", they can't see I'm trying,
Whatever the setting, I feel like dying,
Recently she has been occupying,
My mind that has been solidifying,
Into something quite unsatisfying,
A ball of depression that doesn't stop supplying,
She took me in and then pushed me away,
What's the problem, did she think I was gay,
Does she think that love is just a game you play,
Till' you ruin a man and watch him decay,
*****, love is not a ******* buffet,
Pick a meal, put it on your plate and stay,
Right now it's in your best interest to obey,
Because I won't let you be lead astray,
Even though you already got ****** up,
And I know you're slowly becoming corrupt,
I love you so I might as well give up,
Continuing life normally until I erupt,
I'm ending this now, this is my last verse,
So I'll take my bow and accept my curse,
It would never allow me to take first,
So I say ciao, now it's time to disperse.

Can't think about hanging out with friends,
When I'm with them and bonds can not mend,
I have to pretend everything is fine,
If they ask me how I am, I have to lie,
A broken heart is too hard to explain,
A feeling, not a word, nothing that plain,
I feel the force of a tsunami and all you see is rain,
Now I must draw blood, because I'm feeling this kind of pain.

You are the only thing that crosses my mind,
But hey, that's fine.
I'll play in the pain and use a laugh and a smile,
But only for a while.

One will cut to feel something that is real,
And intense because you leave me in suspense,
When I can't feel you and I don't know what to do,
And I'm having withdraws, *****, get a ******* clue,
You can't just subdue a man and make him love you,
Then throw him away and go on to someone new,
But I guess you are allowed to do you, that's true,
So give me your fever, inject me with the flue.

You are the only thing that crosses my mind,
But hey, that's fine.
I'll play in the pain and use a laugh and a smile,
But only for a while.

You make me sick to my stomach,
And I really wish I wasn't,
Stuck in this hormonal mindset,
I haven't found my way out yet,
I can't go to sleep anymore,
When I'm thinking about a *****,
That has swept me off my feet,
And let me fall on my back,
Only feel her heat when she's,
Launching a full blown attack.

You are the only thing that crosses my mind,
But hey, that's fine.
I'll play in the pain and use a laugh and a smile,
But only for a while.

I end these off with an I love you,
Or there's nothing I wouldn't do,
But now I'm done with that stuff,
I'm ending this abrupt because I've had enough.

I understand pain can be found worldwide,
And pain can teach us things in life that can be applied,
To love and relationships alongside,
The fact that she has me feeling like Mr. Brightside,
What's the lesson I'm supposed to learn here,
To be strong, secure, solid, stable, and preserver,
I would rather trash feelings and disappear,
Getting right up and out of this putrid atmosphere,
Kiss me when you're high, love me when you're sober,
Reject me when you're sober, then crap, it's all over,
I can't portray reality like Donald Glover,
And I can't make you feel better in this month of October,
Getting with you would be like finding a four-leaf clover,
But I'll continue writing until I get a lot older.

Heartbroken and I'm still in love,
Outspoken because I kind of,
Have this dumb problem called anxiety,
Can't function in normal society,
If I wasn't anxious, then I wouldn't be lonely,
I feel the need to vanquish the one and only,
Person that I love in my mind,
And I'm done with this whole,
Raising her above to the tide,
Of loneliness so I'll guide,
You to the exit now I'm done with this rhyme.

Saw them holding hands the other day,
So, I tried to stay away,
If I got close they would see my sadness,
But last week she was on my mattress,
This is why I'm so confused,
Either way she is amused,
She's between my sheets,
Then he's between her legs,
Anger continues to increase,
So, stay out of my bed,
Or don't do what I say,
Just keep clinging to him when he's around,
Then cling to me,
When I'm the only one inbound,
Don't stop the fake love you're spilling out,
If you don't want to,
You'll break more men, the dishonest and devout,
But don't be surprised if out the blue,
Some man breaks your heart and cheats on you,
It'll be something that you can't construe,
But if you come back to me I'll say, "Who knew? ",
Do what you must, and I'll go along with it,
Drink your alcohol and give your **** another hit,
I'm trying not to care,
Trying to take my feelings and smother it,
But now I'm done,
Although I could go on forever,
Once the ramblings begun,
I couldn't be more clever,
How do I end this,
Obviously not with a kiss,
Or an I miss,
Although I really do,
And I'm feeling blue,
I guess this is my cue,
I'm out...

I messed up the other day,
I was out on my way,
To Get some sodas for a party,
Passing up Honda's and Harley's,
On my 44-Inch long-board,
Going and coming back with no reward,
Cause I was going 30 down the street,
The road was slick, I slipped and tried to land on my feet,
But I was going too fast,
I must've missed the forecast,
And it was pitch black,
So, who knew it was wet,
Flipped a couple times, messed up my back,
And whiplash to my neck,
Had to walk five minutes back home,
Tried to wave down cars but I continued to roam,
Cause nobody's tryna' pick up a ****** man,
On the side of the street that can barely stand,
Eventually got home to the poker party,
Parents looked at me and yelled, "Good God Almighty",
Go clean yourself up, you might need stitches,
Where's your long-board, I said it's back in one of the ditches,
Hopped in the shower to clean out the dirt,
But the pressure on the wounds really hurt,
The adrenaline rush dulled the pain,
But it was ending, blood dripping down the drain,
I brought up this story three days later,
Not to show you that I'm a bad skater,
But to show that the hole in my heart, that massive crater,
Hurts more than all my physical pain, yeah, it's a lot greater,
Never felt pain like a broken heart,
It is literally off the charts,
They asked me for my pain level,1-10,
It hurts like the devil, I said eleven,
Thousand four hundred sixty-eight,
Below sixty-nine, let's get one thing straight,
It was only a kiss and an exchanging of words,
For two and a half months but now that's for the birds,
Apparently, because emotions mean nothing,
When you're a ***, but to me they mean something,
Now I think I got my point across,
Now I'll go back to enduring my albatross,
Now I'll hold my pillow tighter in the night,
Cause I left a killer, a beautiful white,
Girl that left me to die,
You think you're so ******* sly,
Going around with different guys,
Making all of them cry,
Buying into all of your lies,
Now my anger is getting to me,
I should leave, I should say goodbye,
I can't perceive even though I have good eyes,
That's the last time I'm deceived,
By a girl that has disguised,
Herself to look like an angel,
I'm not mad though,
I just want to strangle,
Anyone that wants you,
I'll stop now, I'm so confused,
I've been bruised, misused, then refused,
A relationship, man this is abuse,
You're the only one that's amused,
I can't stop the rhyming yo,
This must be diffused,
Now my motto is bros before hoes,
It's time to elude...

I have no plans for after high school,
And man, I've got no fuel,
Sitting round' the house lazy,
Imma' end up in a whirlpool,
Letting the tide take me,
Letting the bride break me,
Letting the pride wake me,
Letting the guide make me,
The tide carries me to danger zones,
In this water, there's too many stones,
And all these crazy hormones,
Tryna' take me to ladies' moans,
Tryna' get me stuck and distract me,
Making me a schmuck avoiding reality,
I've been struck with insanity,
I'll let these waters pull me through humanity,
And now we're onto the bride,
That chooses not to abide,
By the law of love and life,
Which clearly states the following,
"Don't go out on dates for love you're just borrowing.",
Because there's no way to give it back,
That would just leave a hole or a crack,
In the heart of the one you stole from,
Leaving them broken, hurting or numb,
And then the pride tries to take over,
But I never let it get closer,
To my control panel,
Cause it would mess up the channel,
That my life is playing on,
From Saudi Arabia to the Amazon,
Worldwide, we all let the guide make us,
But don't let it take over, it'll break us,
It's the system, it's a down,
It's Hillsong, it's Chris Brown,
It's anything that can be imagined,
And anything that can't,
It could even be a dragon,
It could be an eggplant,
It grows on our thoughts,
So, we're all at a loss,
Because we won't stop thinking,
And we won't stop blinking,
And we won't stop drinking,
And we won't stop sinking,
In this well that we're digging,
But we still keep grinning,
And my eyes are stinging,
And my ears keep ringing,
Because something keeps on trying to tell me,
How to escape reality when I'm ready,
But I'm blind and I'm deaf,
And my mind is a chef,
That cooks up these thoughts,
That brings me fantasies,
Things that I'd rather not,
Keep in my mind, it's a fallacy,
And all it does is bring me agony,
See how fast the subject changes,
The thoughts flow, all these rearranges,
I better stop now, I could go on for ages,
Talking about nonsense, the pain and the painless,
But it's so hard to end these things,
That's why sometimes I end abruptly...

Right now, I feel like admitting,
From the knowledge I feel distant,
Is it cause my brains reached its limit,
Or cause my skins a different pigment,
Either way, since I was a little baby infant,
I've seen relationships aren't always sufficient,
But I didn't know this whole time I was spitting,
That other people can be so malignant,
Had a friend tell me another friend was amazing,
This another friend was in the middle of dating,
And for some reason he was getting all the praising,
Because he said, "A relationship ain't worth breaking.",
See now, they all know that a man like this is rare,
But apparently, I was not aware,
That it's not normal to be loyal,
It's normal to put a heart in an oven and broil,
It till' there's nothing left to love,
Think wisely when push comes to shove,
That's what they told me,
Your heart will break, but there's a lot of fish in the sea,
Most of the fish are sharks and poisonous,
And some of them leave their marks on us,
Whether these marks are good or bad,
Or if they leave us happy or sad,
Or if they stick with us,
And don't put up a fuss,
But I guess it doesn't usually turn out that way,
Cause most of these hoes been led astray,
The men, the women, the straight, the gay,
They will all steal your love and just play,
Like it's a game of musical chairs,
Slowly running out of love till' no one cares,
The broken are hard to heal, yeah, some pretty tough repairs,
So just keep working, seal up all the cracks and the tears,
Juice Wrld said that all girls are the same,
And I was blaming myself, man I feel insane,
I guess I know now that commitment is rare,
But people like us will continue to play fair,
And we will never stop continuing to care,
Cause we know that there should only be a pair,
Of lovely humans that don't stop the love,
And continue to raise each other above,
The mountains, the clouds, the moon, the stars,
But I'll be alone in my own twisted bars,
You're all on earth, but I'm out on mars,
You easily get yours, but we can't get ours,
Cause ours is a form of love that's the rarest,
It includes things like promise and marriage,
Honestly the things that I truly cherish,
But if you're just going to be careless,
Then get the hell out and perish,
I'm a libra so of course I want fairness,
Now I'm going back to my emo rap,
So, you all better cut the crap,
Cause you're all about to get slapped,
If you think love is something that can be scrapped.

Do not try to force out rhymes you cannot make,
Deplorable bars oftentimes makes me ache,
If you have nothing to talk about then keep your mouth shut,
Leave open mouths to the poets and the *****,
Your words are a disgrace to poets everywhere,
I read your new "poem" and saw you in my nightmares,
Visualized a grotesque brace face in a wheelchair,
Not only your verses, but your looks give a scare,
Don't think you created magic and will be big tomorrow,
That would be tragic considering what you will undergo,
A world of pain realizing you're nothing more than,
A miniature grain of Sahara Desert sand,
That doesn't and won't ever stand out in the slightest,
I'm burning you everywhere, I'm the sun, ***** I'm the brightest,
I will leave now but I will be back in the morning,
You better leave without a bow, this is your last warning.