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a silent chaos Jan 2021
,.
I paused,
to take a break
but why did you stop.
...
a silent chaos Jul 2018
...
I guess,

silence is the loudest scream
you'll ever hear.

silence is the greatest chaos
you'll ever see.

silence is the most painful feeling
you'll ever bear.

And,

Silence is the most frightening
voidness you'll ever be trapped into.
Will you be able to get out? Or will you be blind? Will you be deaf? Or will you be numb?
...
a silent chaos May 2018
...
Why would someone want to kiss the moon when she already have the sun?


Because she doesn't want the perfect that will give her everything, rather, she wanted a flaw that will ignite her gloomy nights.
a silent chaos May 2018
I know
you hold
the world
of truth

I can
see it
between
each gaze

Reflects
with tears
but still
confused
on what
it really
means
a silent chaos May 2018
I know
you hold
the world
of truth

I can
feel it
between
each gaze

Shows
a hint
of what
the universe
may be
therefore
giving endless
casts of
sense
a silent chaos May 2021
I heard them say
that the clock is ticking
but we should take our time.
And so I did.
Only to discover that they've mistaken—
it's a bomb, not a clock.
a silent chaos Nov 2018
I know
you hold
the world
of truth

I can
hear it
between
each gaze

Screaming
the thunder
hidden inside
with the
burning
silence
that ignites
a silent chaos May 2021
I dreamt of you in a rose-colored glasses
Surreal and so it hurts
a silent chaos Nov 2020
Once near, I knew the destination — nowhere.
Of thoughts? Along the lost pavement
Am I? I ask, right now, may where.

Knew the destination I once nowhere near
Along the pavement of lost thoughts
Ask where I may now. Am I right?

Nowhere near the destination I once knew
Lost along the pavement of thoughts
May I ask, where am I right now?
a silent chaos Aug 2021
Do you know the greatest things in life?
You don't.
Because they're still within your grasp.
I'll ask you again when you lose them.
a silent chaos Nov 2020
Longing,
For the day I can write again.
a silent chaos Jun 2021
conversations in my head
all the hello and good nights that's been said
when will they ever be heard
a silent chaos Mar 2019
the way you shine,
does it mean, you'll fade?
a silent chaos Jan 2021
You are made of
a never ending chain of souls
of the people you've given your
every inch with.
a silent chaos Feb 2021
Such a soothing happy ending
I just wished it's ours.
a silent chaos May 2018
she used to be fine
but I don't know what happened
she gave up in life.
a silent chaos May 2021
desires for shallow deeps
chained yet detached
inadequate worth
monotonous fun
filled with emptiness
don’t you get it?
we’re just hollows trying to matter
a silent chaos Nov 2018
Loving you is life,
loving you is having you
loving you is the beginnings
loving you is the cold
loving you is fire
loving you is the storm
loving you is vibrant colors
loving you is gloomy nights
loving you is everydays of joy
loving you is sadness together
loving you is being simple
loving you is a flaw
loving you is noticing the unnoticeable
loving you is loving you nonetheless
loving you is wanting to see a smile
loving you is the mood
loving you is looking forward
loving you is a glimpse of the past
loving you is an uphill
loving you is feeling down
loving you is an adventure
loving you is unexpected
loving you is pain
loving you is mended wounds
loving you is believing
loving you is broken trust
loving you was a journey,
loving you was life.
a silent chaos Jan 2021
When I told you I am leaving,
I do hope you realize.
All the words I can't speak of, I sing.
So they are to lull a bye.
a silent chaos May 2021
Suddenly, the comfort of aesthetics left my eyes
Replaced by voidness filled with questions of uncertainties
Who am I?
And who I want to be?
a silent chaos May 2018
Let's give the world a try
Look up, give the day a smile
Touch the passing hours
With a curt but smooth remark
Share gazes between each leaps
Kiss every departure goodbyes
But let's do it in parallel lines
a silent chaos May 2019
Is pain considered a drug when you keep coming back for it? For more?
a silent chaos Sep 2018
i want to feel the rain,
the Rippling course of pAIN
Can you pour on me once again?
a silent chaos May 2019
And suddenly,
I'm so tired of being just okay.
a silent chaos Nov 2020
so less for more—
soulless for mourn.
a silent chaos Jun 2018
The moment I felt like crying,
he looked at me
and without a word,
he smiled,
he made me laugh,
But I cried more.
For I know better
that he feels the pain
but chose to make
me see the bright
to spare me for
the night.
Today, I realized that being strong is being weak just deep inside. And at some point, a smile is actually a feeling.
a silent chaos Jul 2021
the walks,
the casual talks,
the evident smiles–
messing around for a while,
the shared stories,
along with the hot calamari,
the touches,
the warmth,
the old,
the normal,
the usual,
the life without the masks.
a silent chaos May 2018
true, I was all right
false, I was never at fault
neither, have I told?
a silent chaos May 2019
Insecurity
is one hell of a sharp knife tonight.
It's killing m-
a silent chaos Dec 2018
Why is it so hard to believe you?

— The End —