it's a thing called depression
it crushes you down
squeezes at your throat so tightly
you're on the brink
only you can tip the scale
off the ledge
salvation is a hoax

this bitter temperamental thing
it deteriorates the brain
happiness bleached from memories
weaving into your form
gripping into the gaps of your flesh
holding you captive- capturing you
and gently lapping the life out of you

Nothings coming out right
It all feels like sludge
Slippery **** like sludge
That pools under cotton socks
See- that- that was descriptive
That's what I was missing
Still most all words are frantic
Jumbled incomprehensible feats

One of these days
One of these years
I won't have to pour my pain onto this screen
And maybe one day I won't feel so alone

bubble up and dissolve
I bubble up and dissolve within myself
all the time- day after day
thin membrane stretched taut
only billowing breath holding me up
growing and climbing up
with a *****

I'm snapped back in
collapsing within myself once more
soap solution never strengthening enough
to hold me up to solidify my existence

everyone has dreams while I just wish to sleep

I dream of fair resources
Of a fair chance for all
Where the biggest issues humanity faces
Are not created by humans at the top
Where there are no billionaires
Smothering the 99% rest of us
With greed, money, and zeal

I dream of green hills rolling
Of wind, air, and water power fueling us
Where we prosper with the government's best interest being in
Us
Not their vain agendas
Poison Native, Black, and Latino neighborhoods
Where they lock up Black youth
Strip us of power, resources, and wealth
Wealth we lost being enslaved for centuries
Power they accumulated by being vicious monsters
Resources they take to this day from lands never their own

I dream of justice
I dream of a day where I can stand and not witness someone be blatantly misgendered
Someone being denied living their best life because they aren't all if not mostly a
White
Male
Straight
Cis
Upperclass
Able-bodied
Able-minded
Straight sized
U.S. citizen
Etc. to all privileges

I dream so hard of freedom
Not to be bigots' excuses for oppression any longer
I dream of tomorrow being so beautifully filled to the brim with opportunity for all
Yet I know
This is a dream because
This country
This world
Is a ******* nightmare