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Estella Feb 2021
like a shattered mirror,
because I can still see,
broken and shattered,
but I am still supposed
to make sense of the reflection
when I can't even make sense of
what it is reflecting.
broken, but pieced together.
shattered, but still hanging on–
piece by piece
Estella Jan 2021
Love—some say its the most powerful force on earth
Yet somehow two hearts that are meant to be, are torn apart by it.
Two hearts that are meant to be, never heal,
And two hearts that are meant to be, never find eachother again.
Just a rough draft that has been hiding in my notes for a while :)
Estella Jun 2020
the excitement ahead,
and the hurt I am leaving behind.
the pain before me,
and the happiness behind me.
none of it makes sense.
how can I be so excited to move on,
but it breaks my heart to say goodbye
I leave for the army in three weeks and my emotions are CRAZYYY
Estella Apr 2020
it weighs on my heart.
in the back of my mind,
it continuously haunts me.
Estella Apr 2020
just as the sun causes a flower to bloom,
so does your trust cause my true colors to truly show.

how slow this process may be,
but oh–
how the end result is worth it.

and you make pluck it or leave it,
just like you may love me or leave me.
because it takes a lot for my true colors to show
Estella Mar 2020
Because I just feel used ya know?
Because I am forced to go,
Then forced to be the responsible one.
Never can I have a little fun,
Because I am always babysitting everyone else.
You use me because I am so good to you,
But I never get the same energy in return.
I am forced to deal with your problems,
But no one is there to help me with mine.
There is the occasion few,
But no one understands.
You respect me,
But I don’t feel loved.
Sometimes I wonder when it will pay off.
When will it all be worth it.
Because I have been trying for so long now,
And it just gets harder and harder
But nothing gets any easier.
my heart just hurts and nothing seems worth it anymore
Estella Feb 2020
you finally made me feel special.
I almost thought I was the one.
the one you couldn't let go of.
the one that was always in the back of your mind.
the one that meant everything.
But then I realized.
I'm the one easiest to use.
because I used to cry to you.
and now I cry because of you.
and the worst part is.
you aren't worth my tears,
and that makes them fall even faster
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