there will never be the time so can i say something hurtful
can i sink my hand into your chest do i even have the power
like you would ever say
but i want to never see you again i want the notifications to stack i want to live a different life and i wonder if my doctor would agree and i wonder if youd just let it happen and if that would make it better make it easy if you could just never
i just want to say it i just want to say it
is this as good as it is going to get
should i quit while im ahead
as if i was ever anything but two blocks behind at least i was always looking forwards but the trouble is i never looked both ways so what is all of this even worth when my body has become my grave

with a look watch the book take it took rather light cooked
make it shook talk it rook follow soot would it
round the bend do it send feel a wake water trend
bake it rake it shake it till the faker is in bed yuh
shoulder coulda stayed for awhile keepin aid for a style
walker talked bottle hotter followed crept exiled shocker maimed
framed with it same day lame couldnt
major minor sold in diamond whiner keeper copper folded daughter locker tamed with it
back bridled shoulda
game sided woulda
fallen to be crawlin fists of dollars to be callin funny
money money money money money keep it comin honey
vent sobbing bold bent red bawling
solder didnt
and a wicker minute
**** crawlin in the bitter with it
on a back mast bad stack wrap blast betcha dolla nab fast lack that banned cast which stood it
wouldja fall in with it
book could it
wouldnt walk straight in the face
with the way that he took it like
**** did it
and he gotta sike it all inna weird wet way like a sun under fog on the bay in the rain on the wall
pit type woah stay to wicked
flip right phone pay to win it
bit lye misty oughta sit throne may u finish
sit tight so there fake to spin it

at the bus stop with a juice box
and a heart full of love.
on the pavement an arrangement
of impersonal hugs.
how i miss you when im with you
and what it used to be like.
over blue ice saying white lies
ill be quiet tonight.

.
1. benadryl
2. earl grey tea
3. creation inflicted upon the world in fervor and apathy alike, burning afterimages of annihilation deep within your skull, it is the very heart beat embedded in your skin that unnerves you in the night
4. count to ten
5. again.

like coffee filled with caramel
reeses cups and cookie butter
two hundred forty calories of coca cola
like a cupcake

surely you must understand

i have nothing to say for myself anymore.

just about eye height

the second board from the left of the splintered shelf in the shed
and its just about why i

stand beside the wasps nest in calm sweat like palms melt somewhere in my pockets
but its more about the time by

which i find a trowel on the wall beside the power that ive always needed to decide to recall
because its really when my mind dies

that i find that such denial can be freeing although always seeming fleeting
and thats the moment with my eyes wide

stuck inside the shed

inebriated ambitions caught between drywall with infuriating vision like the fire in a fissure in the trenches of the sea - a treacherous embellishment upon the rolling folds of blankets on rivers italics in bold