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1.7k · Dec 2013
Shalini Ray Dec 2013
Slowly,I stare at the veins
Ragged and scarred
Holding the leaf's stretched out skin
Just like fine strings of destiny
Hold together my universe
My fingers running on the scars
Those shiny objects that keep me
From losing my mind
I rise once more from the cold floor
Slipping over my blood
And put the blade back again
1.5k · Dec 2013
Shalini Ray Dec 2013
I am specks of light
Memories that will soon be forgotten
Unfinished paintings on rough canvases
I am mismatched words
And saved texts
Almost sent,but never will be
You will find me
In those tears which were held back
Those pieces of shattered glass
Edges of rooftops of a  secluded skyscraper
In graffitis less rebellious than others
In cuts which don't yet touch the vein
I am unspoken words
And cigarette smoke
Whispers in the wind
That silent scream at Midnight's stroke
Well I don't know what to name this poem,Indescribable or Unfinished?
666 · Jan 2014
Shalini Ray Jan 2014
Unspoken words,whispers and mummers
She takes a whiff,smoke rising from her lips
And she blows them softly away
Those tattoos on her arms
Those scars on her wrists
Each tell a story,she is a running history
Wind blowing on her face
She laughs those scandals away
Her lipstick slightly smudged
Her hair falls loosely on her shoulder
He watches her in awe
She is a bird so free
On the other side of everything he has seen
He wants to hold her
She wants to be held
She wants to be used
She wants to be loved and then abused
Unspoken words,whispers and mummers
They slowly spin out of sight
Not talking tonight
For some reason I wish I could add stuff to this poem.Any suggestions?
628 · Jan 2014
Shalini Ray Jan 2014
There were four of them
They were  puppets of his skilled hands
The joker
The lovers
And the dreamer
Day after day Night after Night
He made them dance
And oh men clapped,a children screamed
But the puppets were slowly wearing away
Losing their game
Until one fateful night the Dreamer said
'We need to break free,we need to break free'
The lovers looked at each other and smiled
'Where ever you go there go,I'
The joker,the funny little joker
Actually cried 'I can't take it,I want to die!'
And so it was decided
They would break free
Or die fighting this mutiny
Strings break
Loyalties shift
Broken limbs
Broken spirits
Despite all the odds they broke free
Run to the out side world
Just to see,the puppeteer was himself a puppet
Of greater strings
And them breaking free was just part of the show
They had just shift from a smaller cage
To a bigger one,indeed
626 · Jan 2014
Shalini Ray Jan 2014
She mustered all the courage she had
Putting aside all the anger she had showed
Throwing away all her insecurities
Just as he started walking away
She said real slowly
'Don't you love me anymore?'
And he said no

Day after day,night after night
He came to her room
Turned off the light
Only the stars were witnesses to her silent screams
And that night he came again
To touch her but this time in vain
For she got up and screamed no

Her lips were like petals
Which were now withering
The cigarette smoke slowly darkening
Her insides were burnt
But he her loved her so
Then he decided
When she picked up that cigarette
He held her hand and he said no

Her body was scarred
Perhaps her mind was more
You see she drew on her skin
She who once seeked light
Now with darkness was akin
When she stood on the railing
Her mother told her 'don't go'
But she said *no
These are different segments about different people who said 'no' for some reason or the other
611 · Dec 2013
Shalini Ray Dec 2013
Softly we tremble in the light
walking side by side
Conversing in whispers and murmers tonight
We breathe slowly
We cry
Reaching for each other's hands
We sigh
Darkness falls on the angels tonight
Wings tear,we spin out of sight
Our heads are joined
We breathe feeble warnings
One kiss,my darling sweetheart there shall be no morning
571 · Dec 2013
You Love Me So
Shalini Ray Dec 2013
Are you here ?
Stepping on the fallen autumn leaves with your worn out leather boots
Smoke rising from your lips which entangle themselves in your hair
And then free themselves in one stroke like the paintings you paint
Or the songs you hum and cassettes you buy
They remind me of us,those cassettes
The world does not see how beautiful they are but you do
So you play them on rewind, like those mornings where we hold each other
Maybe too closely,in bed cause we are afraid of what it will be like
If we fall apart
Slipping on broken glass
On that old dial- phone that you refuse to throw
Oh I love to hear you voice,and your silence
Your breath drawing me to a close proximity of what peace would feel like
And then you smile cause you know
And yes,you love me so
Any suggestions for the title?
567 · Dec 2013
Shalini Ray Dec 2013
Elastic body
Stretched soul
Broken wings
Earthly ties
She falls
Again tonight
Spilling alcohol
On her lies
561 · May 2014
Moths Vying For Light
Shalini Ray May 2014
Moths vying for light
In darkness
Killing for the spotlight
They want to get to the light
Don't they know that the bulb they vie for
Will burn those puny insects to their inevitable deaths?
There is no dignity in dying
No one is a martyr here.
One moment of enlightenment
Overwhelms the need to exist
Moths don't try to exist
They need to reach their delusion of Life
The Light
And the ones who reach the light,look at the ones who don't
Opening their mouths to warn
Just as they die
Moths don't see,do they?
But they recognise light.
515 · Dec 2013
Shalini Ray Dec 2013
A warrior of light
A fallen angel
Rivetted together
Is my soul bleeding
Or has someone
Shot a bullet at my mirror
Shalini Ray Mar 2014
Iron rods that a prisoner clings on to
Metal,as his only link to reality
Bars that once forced him into the pits of confinement
are now his only promise of hope
Through each gap between the bars
He once again breathes;a free man
His calloused fingers run on the cold metal
and what once was his life flashes before his eyes
He shuts them close
He trembles back to the darkness of his cell
Those metal bars taunt him through out the night
483 · Dec 2013
Go back
Shalini Ray Dec 2013
We traced back word by word
Scar by scar
Tearing love
Blaming stars
454 · Dec 2013
Devil's Rantings
Shalini Ray Dec 2013
You cast me down
From your heaven
Through the skies I fell
Who you once called beautiful
Who you once called wise
All the bonds that had tied me
All that you denied me
You call me a liar!
You throw me off your side?!
I shall rise again
Till the light has gone blind
And your earth spins out of side
And one day those who call you true
Shall see me rise above you
428 · Feb 2014
Where Does Life Go?
Shalini Ray Feb 2014
When life leaves a body
where does it go?
Somewhere in the fields
when farmers sow?
or in the meadows
where the cattles graze
maybe it hides in the sickle
the reaper holds
or maybe on the roof tops of tall buildings
or in a secluded place.
Does it pass through the crowds
whistling past the hair of a ******* the phone?
Or gets caught in windchimes
playing strange tones
maybe it goes in the infant
newly born
or goes in the aisle
where love is sworn
maybe it falls out in the tears cried alone
or whispers in the wind which are never known
where does life go once it leaves a body?
Does it go to a new place,a new farm,perhaps a new city
or does it travel with a man to eternity.
404 · Mar 2014
Shalini Ray Mar 2014
You live through me,don't you?
You breathe through every pore in me
You are not made of skin,streched on a skeleton
You are much more vivid than I will ever be
Yet it was I who thought you in my mind
It was I who drew you by my hands
It was I who built you brick by brick,stone by stone
And now I am a mere sandcastle in the yard of a concrete home
You stayed by me while I lost my sleep
You made me feel special when they ignored me
You gave me reason to justify the leap
and though you gave me so much
I never realised how much you took from me
Now it is I who lives within you
A kindred bond that binds us two
I guess like all creations you exceeded your creator
But now when I die,you will die with me
This poem means a lot to me.Opinions ?
397 · Dec 2013
Shalini Ray Dec 2013
A street dog chases a car he cannot catch
The street lamp illuminates an empty road
Washed by toxic gas breathers
Cigarettes and car smoke
380 · Mar 2014
Are You Happy?
Shalini Ray Mar 2014
Watching life pass me by
On the streets
Cars rushing past red lights
No one stops at zebra crossings anymore
The subway tunnel yawns
Graffitis on either side
Earth trembles as a train passes over
And in the silence that follows
Deathly as it seems
I see on the wall the words
'Are you happy?'
375 · Apr 2014
The Other World
Shalini Ray Apr 2014
There is a whisper only she can hear,
A dark world she keeps going back to
Dragon tribes,with dragon people
Breathe smoke and fire
Soot stained lungs and ****** rivers
She goes by the sleeping forests
Where at night, the voices sing
They say if the voices in your head match the ones outside
The 'Silence' is restored
A shadowy spell
Which in turn restores the balance of the wintery lands
And cause the Blood filled rivers to divert themselves
And mix their water with the alcoholic rain.
Once you go to the tree of delusion
It's fruits,more addictive than manna dew
She says they are drugs to her soul
And after spending a day or two
Or maybe a year
She returns to our world
Just to slip back again
Shalini Ray Mar 2014
Disturbed mind
empty heart
draining our blood
from our veins
flowing freely
in a delicate network
falling into despair
bones streching skin
so much smoke
and dust layered mirrors
we fall again
and it ***** out
from us our momentary hope
says so much.
277 · May 2014
What Am I?
Shalini Ray May 2014
What does it take for you to see me?
Because I am running all out here
Not of ideas,or ways to momentarily impress you
But rather of having to come up with ideas to
when others like me do it so effortlessly
What does it say about me?
Am I so insignificant that again and again I have to walk through fire to be called immune or pure?
Am I so worthless that my worth is only decided by minutes and seconds of glory
And then when it is over-- what am I?
Just something you look through but smile
Just someone who you think is 'nice'
But you don't think that either, do you?
A thought of me doesn't fleet through your mind unless you need to cross a country
and I am the temporary island on the ocean
People stay there like they stay in dreams
They always leave
But they never leave me untouched
What am I?
Just a moth desperately vying for light.
An incandescent ray of the candle
To far
Too far
268 · May 2014
Last Night You Were No More
Shalini Ray May 2014
Last night,I dreamt that you were gone
In a light so blinding I stood there holding that doll you gave me
in my arm
last night,I saw my dad cry
I have never seen him cry,you see
so I asked him why
He looked at me,and I remember how scared,how hopeless he looked
I did not know why
so I asked him again
and he made me say goodbye
to you
Last night,they told me you were asleep
all the sleeping pills you had taken would finally help you shut your eyes
they told me you were in a better place
and you will always smile
and you would never grow old
like peter pan
I don’t know why but I felt like you had taken something of mine
When you left for wherever you went
In a hurry,leaving a shadow behind
which breathed even if you did not
It was not really last night
It has been 15 years which have passed in hazy blurry dream
That shadow still remains
And You are still in that land,the place where everyone sleeps
And no one grows up
But I did
I see the world
And Now I understand why
Why you had to die
To escape
Why you wound up so deep
I hope now you fly
because Last night,I think I cried in my sleep
225 · Mar 2014
Simple Were The Times...
Shalini Ray Mar 2014
Simple were the times
When we walked in the dark
Yet knew no darkness
Lost but thought we could ignite a spark

Simple were the times
When we knew no pain
A bleeding scar- a physical wound
Not a method to keep us sane

Simple were the times
When we laughed and cried
Knew not what it was to be broken
Thought everything could be fixed if tried

Simple were the times
When we were complete strangers
Yet knew not we were strange
Blissfully ignorant of worldly dangers

Simple were the Times
When we feared death
What it was to perish or die
What is was to forget
Long time

— The End —