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Apr 2022 · 194
The Guest
Annie Apr 2022
The hallways narrow stretch along
Amany doors, heavy and locked
A suitable prison, to which I belong
With any passage but windows blocked
And I am imprisoned within

I´m not alone
Let alone with my thoughts
And the strangers away from my reach
But the strangest who attends  me
Is the only one I can speak

During day I may wander
Through the halls of the wing
From one locked door to another
Until sunset begins

Then I may granted visits
Of my warden and host
With conversations and matters
Concerning me most

For I can´t but think and ponder
About this evil true intends
That means naught but death to me
My love and friends

God help me,
For I have been used
My own hands have set free
The devil to the world
And the truth will die with me
Dec 2020 · 89
Volition and Despair
Annie Dec 2020
sometimes I want to die
but I will breathe and breathe
and hold unto my life
and oh,
my heart will beat
unto another night

sometimes I want to sleep
a circling, endless time
to give up,
and complete
my final graceless tine
and break all of my creeds

sometimes I want to fight
a faceless,
nameless foe
I want to beat and bite
and all my temper grows
under cold and moony light

but mostly,
I just live
and I just want to be
a part
I take and give
to my own sake and belief
Jun 2020 · 584
The Traitors Lilly
Annie Jun 2020
Lovely Blooms the flower of betrayal
If it's seeded in it's blood
Thus it always needs a victim
Living of it's own to rot

The traitors lilly is not poisonous
Though it spreads unto a touch
But as a flower of betrayal
It´s tainting weapons work as much

It´s seeds can rest and root forever
Or be in fruit within one year
The traitors lilly hides with others
Changing both color and appeal

Yet a single trait reveals her
More than any other mark
The traitors lilly has no feelings
And can´t do anything by heart

Search for the spark of hipocrisy
Inside a face of plastic smile
Until the mask of traitor lilly
Reveals the lilly´s weave of lies
Apr 2020 · 1.3k
Wintersmith
Annie Apr 2020
A dance, my dance, between realities
My dance of seasons and of life  
A dance I often danced before
Until I felt that mind

That mind, her mind, so joyful
Her mind, so strange, so kind
A mind I never sensed before
Until I saw that face

This face, her face, so beautiful
Her face, her eyes so bright
A face, I never watched before
Until I touched that life

This life, this girl, I danced with
I saw her blazing eyes,
This life, I never knew before
I want to call it mine
To Terry Pratchetts 'Wintersmith'
Mar 2020 · 540
Team Free Will
Annie Mar 2020
Faithless, I walk through the night
Yet by a free will of my own
I broke all of my previous ties
Yet I don´t walk alone
I´m side by side with those I chose
With everyone I care for
With everyone I´m close

For those, I´m fierce to fight for
For those I try to change
Though maybe they are different
Though maybe they are strange
But they can be, all I am not
And all they value, they hold true
So everything I do, I do
To keep them safe and sound
Team free will ftw!
Mar 2020 · 378
The Sacrifice
Annie Mar 2020
I had a dream
Leaping stone to stone
Above a stream
Beneath me faces
Of the dead and old
Around the mist
Of the silent cold

I ran from place to place
Enflaming candlelight
Step by step along
A never ending staircase
Arriving on the top of
A tower, left alone

Haunted by a wooden rockinghorse
I threw down marble stone

By which I made a sacrifice
To fires burning bright
That saved me with its blazing flame
Within this bitter night

(And when I woke I saw it clear
As morning sun after a storm
My memories I couldn't bear
Still stuck in me like roses thorns)
A dream I experienced after assisting my first ***** donation.
Feb 2020 · 106
She
Annie Feb 2020
She
My argent queen, once I thought,
of pride and worth, and wrath
I looked upon your pale, fair face
And followed down your path
Once, I was torn and driven
between honor and disgrace
Until all hope and life and light
Dissolved beneath a haze

Oh Lady, all of my desire
I lost and earned again
Once in a day, once in a week
I whondered, here and then
How I got lost inside this mire
Of hopelessness and rage
I fled, I charged, I stashed
rushing to the deepest,
darkest stage

I called you lady, even then
Yet bitterness is gone
My fear and fume slowly recede
And every task is done
I still can hear your chant
When you are full and fair
But now, your voice is far and faint
My mind diverted and restrained
And I feel banned and bare
Under a new, seductive call
Ensnaring all my heart
RPG thingies
Dec 2019 · 251
Kiss and Cut
Annie Dec 2019
with a kiss and
cut
my eyes are blind
and shut
and while I feel my frenzy rise
I’m sinking
into full moon’s paradise
where carnal and menacing lust
control and determine
my beating heart,
the smell of blood
I’m loosing all my mind
'till
I wake into a shady light
of morning sun and fading night
covered with red
and slightly whacked
I sense all
I once required
a soothing smell
a tempting tie
obligation and desire
RPG thingies
Nov 2019 · 321
Dreamless
Annie Nov 2019
I believe I dream
As soon I close my eyes
Yet
Everything I've seen
Arised me so alive
And when I wake
In emptiness
I miss you at my side
A nightmare,
Aching in my chest
And leaving me in fright

In timeless time
I wait and dream
And wonder where you are
Whenever I am wide awake
I fear for my own heart
Since separation cuts my core
As deep as does my dept
I fall and fall forevermore
To bottomless regret
Remié
Oct 2019 · 248
Other Side
Annie Oct 2019
None by all and all by none
I tripped into a cage
That held me back and hidden
From the world unclosing gate
I raged against it’s iron walls
I wedged against it’s *****
I tried to break, to faint, to brawl
But ended on it’s *****

Until a hundred years of seconds
Had flashed past before my eyes
When silently, an echo halled
Down from the other side
It pierced my shell and yanked me
It dragged me through the dark
And nearly teared completely
My endmost hope apart

But after all and none
I breached a new surface
That left me breathe and choking
In a long forgotten space
I catched a glimpse of fire scars
And touched a new domain
That fetched and mesmerized my heart
Into a another kind of chains
Sep 2019 · 1.2k
No Regrets
Annie Sep 2019
All of my life has been a search
For things I could not see
For matters founding in my heart
For things that I could be
I sold my home and life
For principiality
But everything was worth the price
And Im remorselessly

Yet I wonder now and then
Whenever I am asked again
What I have answered once
Though I walked freely down that path
And there is no regret
and yet
I wonder what I felt inside
What caused my mind to set
This way along the past
What craving caused my vast
Amount of ruthlessness

I lost my time, with no remorse,
And all of my appeal
The breaking clocks may have been worse
But still, I could'nt feel
Nor understand
what Ive been searching for

And when I carried on my way
I lost myself in forlorn days
Where I found something new
I never had been searching for
And yet I felt that something grew
Inside of me
That let me fear
The things about to come

For I got lost,
found by someone,
Something that changed my mind
I didnt want to lose that fast
Nor leave it all behind

And for the first time I did fight
I changed the clockwork of my mind
I chose a place, a time a side
And wonder about all my life
About decisions, thoughts and creeds
I owned in future pasts
For any deed
I would regret
And yet
I wonder
What have happened
to my heart
Sep 2019 · 493
Fingerprints
Annie Sep 2019
leave no trace upon my mind
but fingerprints inside my heart
till I can feel your touch inside
falling straightaway apart

leave me here, but not alone
cause I can´t stand the silence
piercing deep into my bone
losing unrestrained my sense

leave no marks upon my skin
but scent and taste thereon
till I can treat you as my kin
till all my fear is gone
Sep 2019 · 491
Rivals Tongue
Annie Sep 2019
Of all the poisons that run and grow
Many I´ve studied and stored for my own
But none of them vices works as strong
As the words been spilled by your rivals tongue

Oh, many a poison acts swift or slow
Some crueler than others, either painfull or dull
Yet none of them traceless, as the feelings below
Caused by defilement of a broken vow

True a poison works baneful
Yet compared to attaint
It is mellow and gracious
Saving further complaint

Oh I rather choose the poison
Than the tainted, evil words
Poured by trusted, out of treason
For the poison barely hurts

And I rather die in pain
Than suffer by my pride
And I rather die in vain
Than stay by the devils side
Sep 2019 · 137
Rotten Paradise
Annie Sep 2019
Why does my heart go on beating
While my body and mind
Bleed no more
No thought no cry
And my body will die
When the world sings to my core

Why is my temper still rising
When my will and my wit
Lose their bite
No battle no brawl
Would bring me to fall
Yet silence
Will spread through my mind

Silence and chanting alternate
I got little space in between
And like a ban whispered to my mind
I’m slowly going insane

Call the shadows I’m sinking
I’m loosing my stand
With no cure or death
I’m reaching no end
Until hopelessness
Drives me to my demise
And I am falling
To a rotten paradise
RPG thingies
Jul 2019 · 108
Phoenix
Annie Jul 2019
I´m raising to the frozen sky
I´m setting high,I´m gonna fly
Until the stars fade by
The mornings rising light

Then fire spreads upon the vault
turns silver into shining gold
I´m tossing down, daring and bold
Beneath the blazing bright

The air comprise me like a storm
That I may build another form
And I become a piercing thorn
Thats fervently Inside

I wake into the twilight day
That arise in milky gray
And as I feel the embers crave
I start to recognize

I was a phoenix, am a flame
That´s never soft and never tame
The forge still smolders in my frame
And lead me till the end
Apr 2019 · 238
Kind and Tender
Annie Apr 2019
I wouldn’t call me kind
I wouldn’t call me caring
Still I rose you fast and tight
Aware of what I’m daring

I wouldn’t say I’m tender
I wouldn’t say I’m bonafide
Yet I offered you a shelter
Or rather I drew you inside

I’d rather say I’m reckless
And I never really cared
And I wonder what distress
Initiated my revert

For long time I couldn’t say
What thought had persuaded
And ruled my mind that day
I never really stated

Though I got an aprehension
Gazing at you in the night
A dangerously feel of tension
That I’m still trying to hide
Apr 2019 · 229
Covered in White
Annie Apr 2019
A white cloak for the kings guard
The men without hearts
A shining armor for his knights
The dark guards of spite

But any wore it like a burden
And the white enhanced his eyes
Dark and black they seemed,
But burning
Watching all my tears and cries
Covered in white

What pain give the hands
Of a knightly dressed lord
With no strength to defend
Against any strike and word

But he refused any order
And he whispered in my ear
Strange advice he gave,
But careful
Perceiving all my pain and fear
Covered in white

What ugliness reveals
A fair and pretty guise
Of a blackness deep sealed
Well hidden by blue eyes

But within my weakest hours
He appeared beside my side
Burned and broken,
But protecting
Lying in my lap that night
Covering me in white
To the controversial, but fascinating relationship of Sansa Stark and the Hound. (Game of Thrones/ SoIaF)
Mar 2019 · 145
The Water
Annie Mar 2019
under water, they say I can’t breathe
I’m alone and I sink to the deep
under water, so they say
lays the beginning of decay

but the shore, they carry on
just mad men go
and soon are gone
the shore, they emphazise
means only death and suicide

this they taught well, but not to float
and I can’t swim forever
the water spreads far and abroad
and there is no ‘together’

the lone and ruth smile of the moon
drives me mad, yet not enough
to seek the brink and hence my doom
and I run out of luck

yet as my strength begins to dwindle
desperation fades and die
and resignation kindles
a soothing thought inside my mind

I am released to leave this place
my body ease, my eyes are shut

But as I break the cold surface
the waters brawling ceased
and I open my eyes twice
to see an oceans mind

under water I breath
and feel alive
RPG thingies
Mar 2019 · 1.6k
Dragons! Dragons!
Annie Mar 2019
This is, where the dragons went
Not waiting, not dead
This is, where the dragons went
Dormant they lay instead
Packed tight in a place
With scaling filled space
And nevermore
They have been seen

This is, where the dragons rest
Not reality, not dream
This is, where the dragons rest
In occult shimmer gleam
As magic did fade
They left nothing but sage
And by degrees
They were forget

This is, where the dragons wake
Not brutal, not calm
This is, where the dragons wake
Summoned to our realm
Recalled to a spot
They slowly forgot
And conquering
They wander back
To Terry Pratchetts 'Guards! Guards!'
Mar 2019 · 321
Deep-sea Fish Eyes
Annie Mar 2019
Between the oceans deep-sea shades
Hides in the abysmal ground
The darkness whom the light craves
Down in the deep-sea fishes cave

A riddle to all brave explorers
Since nothing but shadows appear
But crawling under erratic orders
The invisible deep-sea fish hears

No single movement of alien light
Nor living that sneaks through the dark
Escapes the glooming deep-sea fishes eyes
That see every enlightening spark
Mar 2019 · 1.1k
Fly
Annie Mar 2019
Fly
With the closed door
behind me
in my back
I feel like before
like the last time

He calls silently
with the hand for me
and offers the place

on the bed

I feel every step
and I sit down
As I did
before knowing
what comes the next up
And as he touchs me
looking in my eyes
he whispers to me

‘don’t you fight’

and again I fly
far away
to another place
Mar 2019 · 162
Time
Annie Mar 2019
for every light the sun creates
a shadow will upraise
and every men we **** in hate
a child originates
for every sound we do create
the silence will expand
and every second we will save
a second gets misspend
the humans will proceed
and life will conclude
with increasing speed
life moves unto prelude
to a time we can´t anticipate
and neither can prevent
the ticking clock will never wait
until the very end
Annie Feb 2019
Fearing the suns final eclipse,
men turn the night to day
but anguish also narrows wits
and scares foresight away
little wisdom stays
to the panicked men
the hunter hunts
the victim flees
and dread does still remain

Chorus:
Three things can´t be trusted
In the fright that walks the night
The oath of men, the fire’s light
And the sounds of hidden life

Little does the darkness care
About the stranger’s dread
Like dancing shadows in the flame
The restless feelings spread
The blades and armors shining bright
and blinds the fighters eye
And in the dark
The shadows waits
To hunt the hunters pride

Chorus:
Three things are deceiving
In the light of lanterns spark
The strenght of blades, the might of men
And a gleaming in the dark

A voice wails from the shadows deep
Out of the towering trees
And like a hunted animal
The fighters boltness flees
The howling sound like hunting horns
Fills heart and bones with fear
And  in the dark
The glistening eyes
Are glaring bright and clear

Chorus:
Three things are most perilious
The dread that walks the night
The wicked howl that warns you
And the eyes that shine too bright

The warriors cried and ran away
and turned around no more
And spared no thought in silence
What they were panicked for
And as the soldiers fled away
The monstrous beast draws near
A cat, a dog, a donkey
and a rooster does appear

Chorus:
Three things never change its kind
under the darkness ban
The sounds, the eyes and shadows
That fear any armored man
Fun lyrics to the song 'Threes' by Mercedes Lackey.
Feb 2019 · 328
Deep Dive
Annie Feb 2019
All of my thoughts are melting
Inside my mind into a lake of dreams
In which I only see reflections
Of thou and all of thy belief

I cannot touch thy picture clear
Or grasp beneath the surface
Unless I blight or chase away
All what thou hold and bear

I can't do anything but listen
For any silent sound
Watch every detail of expression
And stay on trusted, solid ground

Unless when every light but thy
Vanishes before my eye
I see you everywhere but here
And search for thy embrace
That I can only find inside
The mere of thoughts inside my mind
I take a dive, I fall asleep
And search thou in my dreams
Inside a long forgotten place
Of inner peace and faith

I take thy hand
I hear thy voice
Until I understand
About a young man, understanding his faith and connection to his god in a dream. (Fictional)
Feb 2019 · 485
Perfect Control
Annie Feb 2019
My mind got wrapped into a spell
Entwisted by two hands
And slowly, my resistance fell
Into a man’s presence

My toughts began to twist and spin
Into thin fingers touch
And faster, I’m entangling
Into a frantic clutch

Out of two dark, abyssal eyne
I drew new force and energy
And realised I can’t decline
A kind of curiousity

And fled myself into a vibe
Both flustering and soothing
Until I found myself beside
A control I confide
Jan 2019 · 216
Return
Annie Jan 2019
Return, I say
Is no purpose
No point of my desire
But mind and heart
Choose different
And thwart all they require

Now all the facts
Speak clear against
And none therefore my travel
But all my soul yearns
And spreads doubt
Of all I have to settle

I hear your words
And feel your gaze
And clearly understand
But tough, I wouldn't disagree
My heart still speak against

I will return
But not today
And neither to that place
When all my journeys
Circle back
To trusted room and space
Did you ever wish to return to a place of your past, even though it will hurt you?
Jan 2019 · 548
Bygone Presence
Annie Jan 2019
Ten years and more are not enough
I can still remember
Every torturing tainted touch
that forced me to surrender
Your hushing words, my rising fear
cutting like sharp searing threads
Your very gaze I still see clear
It burned into my head

Once you abused me


Long time I tried to Forget
the paralizing clutch
So long I tried to renounce
your  tantalising touch
But all I achieved, all I obtained
Is a constant Aversion
and irreversible pain

Once you abused me

Now you are gone
And your presence vanished
but the memories have won
Even if you´ve got punished
I´ll never enjoy the love of a man
And I´ll ever avoid intimacy if I can

Once you abused me

You´ve branded me once
turned me inside out
Now I´m wrecked to my bones
But I´ll say it out loud:
Once you abused me
But you´ll never do it again
Jan 2019 · 259
Spirits
Annie Jan 2019
shadows raise inside the heart
of hungry childs with ceasing guard
hope and strength turns into hate
until all their faith will break and fade

spirits whisper and ensnare
a boy that´s weak and unaware
and his mind turns cruel and foul
as he touchs an alien soul

then shades will grow
under his feet
rawling down the empty street
to the children, to the old
those who cannot ward the cold

and slowly, weakness raise to might
as childrens shadows steal a life
humanity gives way and fades
for every soul he steals and raze
Jan 2019 · 984
Aquila
Annie Jan 2019
once was a star sparkling bright
towards the burning sun he ran
but he got blinded by the light
and with his rise his fall began
.
by falling deep he scorched the sky
and thus brought others down with him
one brother died and one got burned
fading brilliance, gloom and grim
.
far away from sun and sky
the star could see again
he saw a milion distant lights
and he would understand
and he would spread his wings and fly
back to his brothers side
.
from then, the star
can still be seen
upon a summersky at night
his mind shines starry, pale and clear
and when they saw his glooming light
they named him Altair
Inspired by Assassins Creed and the origins of the main characters name.
Jan 2019 · 2.3k
Live and Let Die
Annie Jan 2019
Under sizzling and bleeping
The time runs nigh
Between heaven and hell
In a room, too bright
Runs a body deadly circles
Captured in pipes
While the fellowship falls silent
As the headman decides
To live and let die

Slow, but soon, the dying noise
Leaves a weakly beating heart
Fighting it's own pointless war
No men alive shall ever thwart
And lifes children turn quiet
As they face the final loss
The fact they can´t deny
They live and let die

Now, the silence bales and centers
Around the fallen prey
Slowly, death spreads, like a cancer
Drives the living far away
Until only ease is lagging
In the minds that still stand by
Relief about the outcome
To live and let die
Written 2013, after a very, in a psychological way, exhausting day.
Jan 2019 · 1.5k
Seasons
Annie Jan 2019
days are getting longer
colors, warm and bright
as flowers bloom,
I wonder
Is it spring outside

sweat and tastes of icecream
sunlight in my back
burning nights and feverish dreams
it's summer in my flat

rain and whirling, falling leafes
tea and halloween
wandering birds and deepest grieve
it's autum so it seems

damping breath and snow
scarfs and woolen coats
powdered, white wonderworld
and winter's shadows grow
Dec 2018 · 418
Magic of a Fay
Annie Dec 2018
Fairy boy, you catch my eye,
Trough candles and smoke
In a loop of time
We have a nice talk
A fine glass of wine
And coziness in the dark

You’re strange, but fair
I have to confess
Under tilleylamps flicker
I care even less
Wether fairy or not
You are pleasing my eyes

And I recognize
The fume between your lips
Suits your face too well
To resist any kiss
Or any little spell
RPG thingies
Dec 2018 · 265
The Unkiss
Annie Dec 2018
Afraid of the combat
the little bird fled
wrapped in the blankets
it sat on its bed
waiting in horror
scared stiff to the bone
there came a visitor
found her alone

He threatened her coldly
with fiery demands
offering her safety
with a knife in his hands

She bend under his urging
singing a sad lullaby
she found the cruel man crying
and sleeping by her side
the night still hides what happened
but little bird had found
in heart and mind well hidden
the Unkiss and the Hound
To the matter of  the 'unkiss' called scene from Goerge R. R. Martins Song of Ice and Fire.
Dec 2018 · 1.5k
Tiger
Annie Dec 2018
Tiger, Tiger,
in my head
stalking on the street
gazing at me like a prey
raising to your feet

Tiger, Tiger
in my heart
you hunt me down the road
your eyes are blades I cannot ward
My fear I cannot hold

Tiger, Tiger
in my dreams
your body lies in chains
but caught up in your mighty claws
you touch me calm and tame

Tiger, Tiger,
in my mind
I freeze under your eyes
But as I open up your locks
My fear and worry dies

Tiger, Tiger,
deep inside
I run away again
But everytime you run beside
And all will stay the same

— The End —