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Sarah Smith Feb 2014
Prozac nation,
suffocating in frustration
while trying to save myself
from the life of living
under four black walls
alone in isolation.
i try to scream subliminaly
but no one can hear me-
thoughts running through my mind
i see my life coming to an end
with no hesistation to regain
a sense of purpose for the pain.
impulsive behaviors will lead me
to incarceration before i get the
chance to reconciliate with myself.
the past is all over me,
all under me and inside of me
manipulating my mind to believe
this interpretation of my life
is the one in which i die.
Sarah Smith Feb 2014
Hold me close
and let this pass,
breathe in deep
please make this last.
My heart beats faster
and melts in two;
it skips a beat in sync with you.
I love you more than life itself,
and this is why I'm getting help-
to be with you until the end,
so we'll grow old and do it again.
Sarah Smith Feb 2014
miss me when I'm gone,
kiss me softly before you're done.
make me hurt with every breath,
walk me quietly to my death.
hear me screaming through the halls,
don't let me stop before I fall.
bang on the walls
no I won't quit...
I'm deep in thought and throwing a fit.
tie me up and hold me down,
nothing you do will control me now.
I'm free of you and your evil grip,
you're all locked up and trying to flip.
you won't get out no matter how hard you try,
I'm stronger than you-
I won't breakdown and cry.
I've had it with you,
good-bye and farewell.
I'll drown you until you're lost in the swell.
Sarah Smith Feb 2014
I'm captivated by your beauty,
taken back by your charm.
If your lungs beg to take a break
I will give you the breath to stay
until you're okay.
Will you do the same for me?
I can't help but wonder
what is it that makes me yours?
I feel so lonely,
so apathetic-
everything's surreal.
My vision's blurred,
my speech slurred-
I'm too numb to feel you right now.
Leave me to my peace,
security drawn across my arm;
peace is held closely to throbbing heartache.
Sharp, cold metal
against warm,
smooth skin.
Cleanly swipe it through,
fall into the blinding night.
Sarah Smith Feb 2014
unfulfilled dreams turn to regrets,
caged in jars-
never to be released.
it ended too fast,
like a nicotine high.
high and low,
like a roller coaster ride.
curse these inadequacies that **** my soul.
long-lost aspirations
turn to ash in the cold.
potential swings from limb to limb,
drilling holes inside my head.
i expected more from this anti-climatic story;
disappointment reins its' tiny evil head.
Sarah Smith Feb 2014
Lonely has a place in the middle of the heart.
It screams out in the night
For someone to love.
What is love,
But a facade of lies?
Masking the truth and ability to care.
Love is much more than hurt and despair.
Love is not a feeling,
But a concept to learn.
The mind will play tricks
And give you less than you've earned.
The disease is insidious-
Inside us at all times.
Look deep inside your soul for the wisdom to set you free.
Your actions choose your destiny,
What will yours be?
The demons are locked up,
But each day they grow stronger.
Don't believe what they say,
All their words are lies.
Don't forget that they're there when it's all
Hush hush.
Even when they're sleeping,
They're scheming for a surprise.
Don't hold these feelings inside because you're
Sickened by your disease,
Your mind's a dangerous place when you're all by yourself.
Release yourself,
Surrender to the spirit.
The spirit lives in you
As much as it lives in me.
Ask for the wisdom to no longer yearn for that
Empty space in your heart to be filled with love.
Love is not a feeling-
It is patient,
It is kind.
It's a quality of life
That you soon must learn.
God gave you free will
So not everyone's perfect,
but it's the devil's will
Who will tell you you're not worth it.

— The End —