Anxiety and Depression
they form a lethal combination.

you’re  scared but also tired,
feeling to much but also feeling numb.

fearful of failure but lacking motivation,
wanting to be alone but afraid to be lonley.

you're at a constant battle with your Mind.

I now truly know what it means to see everything in your life falling apart, and not being able to do anything about it.

I now truly know how it feels to see your mother break down in front of you, grieving about the happy life she once lived.

I now truly know what it looks like to see your father lose himself to his depression.

I now truly know that life has it's own course and it is inevitable that my family will find happiness.

I now truly know.

send me a lifeline
the world is on fire
i need to go back in time
please believe me, this is dire
let me erase the chaos
& return to a world
where everything is fine
& things aren't in constant decline
why do things keep falling apart
it can't be good for the heart
i wish i could press restart
i'd give anything
for a chance
to reset this life

I can't help myself!
I keep falling into the same hole that I dug,
Being stupid as if I were a mindless little bug.
I say I'm not going to make the same mistake again,
Because I'm tired of living a life that's full of sin.
I can't help myself!
The temptations are way too much,
My temptations are addicting like the softness of a touch.
I can't help myself!
Sometimes I cry because of the person  that I am,
It's like the devil keeps selling me the same  old scam.
I keep falling for it over and over,
All the devil has to say is roll over.
I can't help myself!
I know I'm young and I'll make mistakes,
But one mistake is all that it takes.
One mindless decision could ruin my life,
The decision that makes me choose a life or a knife.
I can't help myself!
I try to crawl up the hole,
But it's like I lost my soul.
Sometimes I do things and I don't care,
There's a  feeling of numbness that no one can repair.
I can't help myself!
It's crazy what temptations will do,
Making you feel like it will always be apart of you.
It's like I can't say no,
It's throwing me over and over again in the same hole.
I can't help myself...

I found you.
Different. Imperfect.

A sad and sickly child
alone in a faceless world.

Bland with naïve thoughts
and clumsy manners.

I found you.
Alike. Perfect.