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Sara Duodu Dec 2018
Or a lack thereof
Keep me up at night

I built a dam
A wall to hide from my feelings
But the water level is rising
Steadily rising
Pressure increasing

There are cracks in the dam
Irreparable and threatening to burst
And yet I pretend
That it’s okay
That it won’t
That there’s nothing to hide from

But I can’t keep pretending.
I’m on the verge of a flood
And I am afraid
Sara Duodu Nov 2018
I hope that one day
I will sit down to write
And fill the pages
With hope
And love
And longing
And ****
And fervour
And feelings
That I have not felt
In a very long time
Sara Duodu Nov 2018
When it is late enough at night
I wonder whether all of it
Was my fault

I wonder what it is
That I did
That made you decide
I wasn’t worth it

I wonder how far
I must have pushed you
To make you want to leave
Without a trace

It is much easier to accept
That I did something wrong
Than to accept
That you left because you stopped caring

It is much easier to convince myself
That I was the problem
Than to convince myself
That you just didn’t want me anymore

It is considerably easier
To hate myself
Than it is
To hate you
Sara Duodu Aug 2018
I am exhausted
But no matter how long I lay in bed
Sleep evades me

I toss and turn
Playing our conversations over in my head
Trying to find where I went wrong

And I wonder
If you will ever let me sleep
As peacefully as you do at night
Sara Duodu Mar 2015
I'm trying to love you a little less desperately so I can live my life a little more fully. but every time I see you smile at someone that isn't me, my heart starts beating in my throat and I want to throw up and I realize that I could never love you any less than I already do.
Sara Duodu Jan 2015
it's 3:48am
and I'm still awake
while you lay peacefully in bed
and my music is too loud
and my brain foggy with sleep
all because you don't know
that I'm in love with you.
I would sleep better knowing thaylt he knew.
Sara Duodu Jul 2014
I guess love
is never really love.
not until you feel it
buzzing in your fingertips
and every time you kiss.
this was a note on another poem but I liked it so much I gave it its own space.
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