Pain in my eyes like Aloe Vera plants.
Silly putty legs without ovaries.

The robots are unapologetically wrong.
The real demons return with different names.
No, that's not a lie. It so happens that
massive things can be done without any consequence.
And by the way, who designed it that way?
Handing out hand-outs when they should
all be on their knees.

You and your too much food.
You and your too much food.
Big fat walruses with hydroponic fur.
I'll take my medicine.
I'll take my shoes off inside the house.

I sprang from my father's head and
mother swallowed me ~ gave birth to
the Milky Way so that our souls moved
into our livers. We all turned into
grocery story magazine stories gone wrong.
But I don't care about that.

Mainly, it's the priests.
I'd like to stick them in my steam-trunk.
I'd like to hang them upside down when
they break the glass.

Who's with me? Who's with me?!
Let's band altogether to stop chewing gum.
Become as old as the stars.


Sara Fielder © July 2022

Have you ever noticed that you
sometimes get
what you wish for?

That's the reason I need to be
really careful when I
think things like,
"Effing arrogant *******,
why don't you just leave?".



Sara Fielder © July 2022

flower spies me through its periscope after
bumblebee abandons.
i lay upon the grass mattress
                smell
the diatomaceous earth being
tilled beneath by worms in cordial, unfazed shifts.

didn't I place that greenery there? predetermined what its
width and breadth would be in accordance with
the grave I dug for roots to go in,

imagined i could control the seasons, boasted
special fertilizer and city water would subjugate
the plant from dying,
              then
took for granted that it would
             thrive
with absolutely no attention
just the same as I do.


Sara Fielder © June 2022

The vengeful ego sun-bakes as heart
races different scenarios it can latch onto.
A steamy argument ensues with voice of reason ~
the long-suffering protagonist. The sucker.

But on the level, it isn't "fixed",
it's merely tolerated until it finds its way toward
the land of never-forget.


Sara Fielder © June 2022

The bravest thing that you
can ever do is keep
your mouth shut.


Sara Fielder © June 2022

Do not ask for favors lest you are prepared to pay in double.

Favors are nothing more than myths.


Sara Fielder © June 2022

It vibrates before it even begins.
The moping, stony chinned silence.

I anticipate nothing.
I anticipate what I am going to do next.

The void stiffens.
It has a way of causing hysteria.

I am too afraid to ask,
"How did we ever lose our way?"
"How did our love become a contest?"

I am no more than a mattress
on the side of the road, and I know it.



Sara Fielder © May 2022

You reread your old poems
to get to know yourself better.


Sara Fielder © May 2022

I rose from bed this morning,
this morning I did rise,
And before the day had e'vn begun,
an urge to close my eyes.

But the light through the window beckoned,
another chance today,
To change it into something,
that'd make a better play.

At a table with some coffee,
gearing up for work,
When a hummingbird like a dart shot by,
poked by invisible fork.

He hello-copped the feeder,
I think he winked at me,
as if to say, "I drink, you blink,
and then I speed away!"

Another sip Sumatra, another sigh I sigh,
Again he buzzes by bejeweled, an iridescent Sprite!
Acrobats, contortionists, have nothing over him,
Pearlescent tiny hoverer with scapulas that bend.

At eight bells now it's time to leave,
I lift my landing gear,
So long sweet things reminding me,
that beauty lives near here.

Sara Fielder © May 2022

we live according to the
moments we create and their
preconceived outcomes alongside

trying to remember the ones
that got away from us

trying to get back what we can't

forgetting the faces of those
who abused you

wishing you'd asked your parents more
about themselves before they died

trying to remember the things you
thought you'd never forget like,

I had a brother Patrick once.
I left him somewhere.
A full blooded brother. I think he lives in Arkansas.

His eyes were cornflower blue, and he had long double-lashes.



Sara Fielder © May 2022

The Idiot!

The one who participates in
unproductive relationships.

The one that fails to ignore
their mistaken identity,
and does not anticipate
good intentions to backfire.

You are the cook
whose meals are less than
satisfying.

You are the friend that phones.

The daughter that won't be
manipulated, the mother
that is concerned, and the wife

who won't give her husband
regular blow jobs.



Sara Fielder © May 2022

It's probably not a good thing
to be so wasted,

at this hour,

at my age,

but on the bright side,
I like the sound
my mouth makes when
it's humming.

Sara Fielder © May 2022

I. Don't wear your apology like a badge.

II. Don't get others to do your bidding.

III. Watch your back but quell paranoia.

IV. When they say you have no sense of humor,
tell them they have no class.


Sara Fielder © May 2022

My mind is in the dollhouse.
Episode 3, and I still don't even
know what's going on.

Concern became
an argument of her own invention,
but in the end, it's just a bad
joke we're playing on each other.

Her phosphorus fangs
and me the irritating
fly inside her soup.

I am conflicted about her magnificence.
Giraffe-necked, insulting every man's dream.
She hammers nails into my chest with her distain.

I gesture surrender turning stove off,
and decide to hold up the bathroom
fort as she reloads.


Sara Fielder © May 2022

In conversations with myself I
say things like, "Where do
bees go when it gets dark?"
and " I wonder what it's like
to mush a Husky.".


Sara Fielder © May 2022

They text their Dad
to tell you
Happy Mother's Day.


Sara Fielder © May 2022

God is an egotist,
and I pray He will forgive me
for saying that.


Sara Fielder © May 2022

treadmill of life,

     I recognize the way you've
outpaced me into the wreck
I have become.


Sara Fielder © May 2022

"Your words have no worth until
you're read", I said.

He said, "We repeat the same mistakes
hoping for different outcomes.".

I said,"Did you get that from the Bible?" He said,

"I learned it from experience."

I said, "I am just a cliche', you are
deep and resonating.".

He said, " In North Carolina, especially.".



Sara Fielder © May 2022

You could write a poem to be
read by those
on the side of Truth but
truth hurts doesn't it?
It stands alone.
It doesn't benefit either way.
It doesn't mock you, and it
doesn't kiss your feet.
By the time justifications are realized
it's too late for your questions
to be viable.


Sara Fielder © May 2022

The only thing I really like about myself are my sneakers.


Sara Fielder © May 2022

Yellow sky with
starlings zinging by,

a crack of wind whips
tree arms into tangles,

it storm-troops disappointed
out of sight,

as baritones inform that
farms are mangled.

Shotgun blasts of hail
thrown hard it hits,

my windowpane with
nature's angry fist,

I shoulda headed West on 51,
but sorta didn't care if it came on.



Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

They won't remember anything you say.
Your words are like weeds and sand grains.
Your words are lost upon empty modernity.

And what about Care?

It is as foreign as heaven because a ***
of quarreling egos doesn't know how to
make peace while it competes for attention.


Sara Fielder © May 2022

Dear Pandemic of Solitude,

I am grateful I can still put two words together after
two years, and that the body I borrowed still has
a little time left to be returned.

Outside, the sound of rain makes things real.

The sound of the thunder rages amongst winds frustration.

I say, "I lack, therefore I am".
I say, "I am but a craving for more when and
at the same time, I know that to lack
I am correspondingly full".


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

There I was watching god play with his toys.
He gives me the thought that
"A thought makes something happen
intentionally, or unintentionally, and there is a
consequence that the universe desires,
and all fingers of blame are sidelined."

Really.
That's what he thought.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

They say you can't un-ring a bell which is like saying
you can't un-hear the things you wish
you hadn't heard which is like saying
you can't forget the things you wish you couldn't
remember which is like saying
you wish that you were stronger which is like
saying you aren't good enough which is getting
us nowhere I'd say.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

Carry them on your shoulders
Sing to them
Push the swing
Apply Bandaids
Tuck them in
Chauffeur to and from school
Refrain from picking their friends
Teach them right and wrong
Teach them to drive
Fix the favorite foods
Allow them to breathe
Wait for them to call,
put you on hold and
then hang up on you first.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

Go capture the lavender sky
in your pink lemonade cup.

Question the wonder of
Catapiller cilia tails.

Doubt not the Sun as it toasts
Earths crumbly crust.

Float on the dust in the
air ducts to vacuate time.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

The smoke curls.
I imagine I ride up it.
I ride. Swirl.
Curl as an incense scent.
Her sins, my sins, your sins.
I don't expect you
to understand.

Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

You know that something's done right when it can't get any better.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

What you think of yourself
is more important than
what others think of you.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

It's just the two of us now,
and i find i talk an awful allot.

To myself.

And I'm a great
conversationalist.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

Don't focus on what others might
think of you when you do for them.

Disregard what they might
do for you in return.

Focus only on the good you might
do as it's being done.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

In the first place,
you never even should
have brought it up.

In the second place,
you never should have
even brought it up.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

his clumsy fingers comb
my octopus hair. They are still unfamiliar,
after twenty-
something years of waiting
for something different.



Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

You may not have loved them the
way they wanted you to,
or needed you to.

That you thought you
loved them at all is really
all that matters.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

I am leaf floating on stream surface.

            I am falling star.


Sara Fielder © Apr 2022

Does, "common sense" mean
you need to be rigid?" or is our society
collectively insane by thinking "Americans"
are better than Everyone else?


Sara Fielder © Mar 2022

Trust is not remembering
which State he told you
he'd be in this week
on business.


Sara Fielder © Mar 2022

Resist the temptation to
pick at your scabs,
and when they wound you again
pretend not to notice.

Sara Fielder © Mar 2022

His words pour out of my ears
snaking away on a belly
of letter vertebrae
saying, "It's nothing personal".


Saying, "Consideration
doesn't come into play.".

The heart has a short memory
interfering with facts. It wants
what it wants without
terms and conditions.

Who knew common sense
could so effectively
smear my immature emotion
into a well bottom?


Sara Fielder © Jan 2022

Stuffing their faces to anchor down.
They ignore the foreclosure.
The courts are oblivious.
No one has any idea that they
can never really be sure of anything,
and nothing would get done if
it weren't for the legs of dogs.
I speed ahead with sharp poles.


Sara Fielder © Jan 2022

My Mother, the one I
wish I'd had.
An alien. The one who
communicates to me
psychically saying
she's sorry with all
four orifices. Saying
I dreamed her and I should
just get over everything
now that I'm older.
I ask if it's true our names
are forgotten in just
two generations. She says,
"That's never been an issue.".



Sara Fielder © Jan 2022

Quiet is the cranium
experiencing
quaint quarters.
Room becomes a mellow
un-dramatic Marshmello,
and for the moment,
there is nothing to
be afraid of.


Sara Fielder © Jan 2022

I watch the autumn day delay its close,
as if its clock had stopped, wood shadows froze,
I feel the gusts of wind begin to calm,
and quiet to a whisper blowing balm.

The suns fat sleepy face an orange ball,
of friendship warming tears as they would fall,
as do the black elm leaves come snowing down,
and cold crows caw away November brown.

I sit and watch the red squirrel hopping by,
a woodpecker taps bark wrinkled and dry~
If I could only hold this scene in place,
a smile would remain permanent this face.

Sara Fielder © Nov 2021

If I really had

as much common sense

and enlightenment

as I should have,

I'd forsake all This for

a salt cave and temple bell.



Sara Fielder © Nov 2021

Slow recognition comes slithering

from the back. toward the front

It's parasitic cynisim

tunneling into brain

segregating pockets of isolation,

blockcading joy as fear

rewires optimism and

hope becomes conspiracy.




Sara Fielder © Nov 2021

The clock says 9:15 PM.

The mind says time is running out.

The body, not as rosy
as it once was,

yet young enough to remember
when the days were longer
than its memory is.


Sara Fielder © Oct 2021

anything done to the best of your ability is a poem.


Sara Fielder © Oct 2021

In a moment of weakness I saw that I was weak.



Sara Fielder © Sept 2021