You left for Europe,
Left me here with no explanation,
I yearned to hear you voice or a sign
I didn't know what to do,
who to talk to when I wasn't with you.
Who to hold when you weren't here,
I wanted things to be clear.
I fell for you
like I've never fallen before.
It took me by surprise
because I kept wanting more.
But now that you're in Europe,
a few things have changed.
I miss you so much,
aside from the mistakes I have made.
I needed to feel something,
a touch of some sort.
I made love to another guy,
hoping my craving for you would abort.
And now I sit here
late at night,
wishing you wanted me,
as much as the Earth needed light.
Should I be sorry,
even though you left me in the dark?
Left me there to wonder...
How could one person leave such a lingering mark?*
I sit here in the dimming light
trying to imagine a time.
A time once spent with you,
never felt lost,
just lost in you.
Your words would take me to distant places.
Places I have always wanted to go.
A place where I could get lost in love,
but not just with anyone though.
You are who I wanted my hands to be intertwined with.
To see the edginess of your knuckles and mine
in a straight line.
Together as one
I felt our pulse
Finally, I was lost in love.
kinda lost its context but i just needed to write what was on my mind. You can see how my mind can go from one thing to the next without a connector but oh well.
i lay awake in bed at night
wondering how you do
you are so far out of my sight
i need to start a new
these late night thoughts unravel before me
i scramble to show i don't care
but my words speak for my aching soul
amidst this lonely air
you have taken a little piece of me
of which you may not care
but that piece held my naive body together
before you took its share
lost in my thoughts
of this late summer night
the insomniacs stay awake
hoping we can survive the solitude of the darkness
to then give our heart a break*
i saw him smile
i became distracted by the simplistic beauty of it
i tripped on the gregarious thoughts anxiously stirring in my mind
i fell just in time for him to look away
and not catch me.
I feel it inside
it aches as i try so desperately to grasp
onto another thought that could make this
people say we want what we can't have
but what happens when you crave this
when you want every curve from his persuasive smile
or every feeling you get when his delicate hands fill the voids in your body
that you thought never
what do you do then
when his words say that he doesn't want a relationship
but his actions show that he does
i'm left in a state of confusion
my thoughts constantly clouding up my naive mind and soul
do i stay
do i let my fantasies with him overlap reality
or do i let somebody go
who i never thought could make me feel so
special and whole
i don't know anymore.
feedback and help.
— The End —