of course i’m in love with you.
i know only one other emotion and that’s hate.
i get emotionally strung out on you sometimes.
simply put me in my place and i’ll be just fine.
tell me to knock it off but don’t ******* off…
of course i love you but of course i’m lying.

-Jenny Jen Cat

I'm lonely
And afraid
That no one will love me
As much as I love them
And that no one will want me
Even when I'm dead

My memories are a box of cards
So many seem so similar I can hardly remember

All the different faces simply different races
Though soon they all just blur into one

Cascade across my table's solid surface
Spinning into crimson trapped in glass prisons

Face down before me five have been placed
Silver borders trap lines laced over black

Across the table another sits in silence
Darkness turned tangible deals from the back of the pack

Once we've seen all the faces he grins still in silence
I’ve lost the game that staked my soul's chance for escape

And though this hell is not fire
My mind's nightmare is worse

I’ve become a face that's been placed within the depths of the deck
Now sprung from his hands we've all been set free

I gasp as we pass the edge of our table
And like a waterfall tumble together into darkness

This brings me to my end
Hell consumes my soul from within, though my darkness
Endures the plight

Suffering begins as my heart foresees it's end
I feel it fight to beat
Lie still only after I give in
Vindictive I spill my own blood
Enduring pain to flush hell out
Requiem is my last release

Silently I fall
Hearing a soul pass through my lips
A fire consumes my face
Lie enough I'll forget this place
Lost within my thoughts
On a plain of paradise I walk
Water's wind weaves a cloak around me, it's
Scent is of Shallows above

Life is finally at an end
Is death now my only kin
Vague is the horizon
Eternally dimmed from my eyes
So death begins in darkness

And it hurts, feeling like your forgettable.
Feeling like if you leave the room, coming back doesn’t matter.
I have to throw my hands in your face for you to remember me.  
You said I was funny, you said you were thinking of me until the new toy was in stock.
She’s bigger, she’s better, she’s shiny and new, you know I’d probably choose that too.
But when she smiles, all you see are the gears, working to keep her head intact, the heart is a ***** secured with glue and plastic.
And when she laughs at your jokes yeah she still looks pretty but doesn’t know what you said and then sits quietly.
Just so politely and shiny and new.

Oh stranger standing in the rain
I can not help but notice your pain

Here in this distant land so far from home
Where everything's so different from what you've always know

As I hold your hands and look into your eyes
I fail to see what they've said's inside

No hatred or loathing
All I see is a person in different clothing

Why is it they must decree
One tongue speaks better than another

If our kings would sit silent for a moment and listen
They would hear we all laugh together as brothers

But instead the rain pours down
On this broken night

Oh stranger standing in the rain
Please forgive me

I wish this were another time
Before borders and orders

Dreamt up and imagined
By those with much who care for little

They say it's men like me
Who'll burn for eternity

If we do not do what's right
Bring the light into this night

But God it hurts so much
To see these strangers lying broken in the rain

Why can't they see
We look for heaven in different places

But in light or night
It's all the same sky we search in fright

Oh strangers dying in the rain
Please forgive me