we cannot worry about things which are out of our grasp
we can only work on ourselves
and who we aspire to be
in spite of our tragedy
hear me when i say
darling don’t fret
about those who will live to regret
the missed opportunities they had received
to value someone more unique and classy
than all the rest

inside my head is a door
everything we’ve been through
good and bad
is behind that door
when i’m missing you
i walk through this door
reliving every moment
of pain, laughter, love, and heartbreak
i’ve tried to ignore the parts that are ugly
even run from them
just so you can stay a little longer
but i cannot run forever

my heart is becoming heavy
tired of holding in all this pain
as we strive to fix our broken pieces
each day takes a toll
mentally and physically
as we keep relentlessly ripping off a bandaid
from a wound hope simply cannot heal anymore

over and over we try
yet fail to succeed
the pain must end and with that so do we
i shall cherish our memories forever
the old you never forgotten

my friend
i’ll miss making memories with you
and the joyful, free spirit you were to me
i’ll miss your call
but even those late nights dancing in parked cars
were all too good to be reality
as much as it pains me
i don’t want to walk away from this door
hell i didn’t think i’d ever have to
but i can’t love you like this anymore

suffocating in this room
the pain we created has become toxic
slowly
i can feel it killing me
urging to escape
you must feel it too
because here you are
handing me the lock and key
to our door

i’d like to believe that when i’m sitting outside
looking up at the moon and the countless stars
listening to the symphonies of insects
that wherever you are
you’re watching the moon too
and in that moment
i feel a little less far away from you

love you
love your personality
love your journey through life, those good and bad
love the parts of you that voice in your head says aren’t good enough
love your curves
love the way your nose crinkles when you can’t help but uncontrollably laugh at his jokes
love the only person you were created to be
love your smile
love all your flaws that are merely just unique and more beautiful than you could ever imagine
because without you there wouldn’t be someone as imperfectly perfect to share this life with
love you because you deserve it
Love, you

my mind has become a burning city
there’s no escape
the smoke is taking over
whispering lies
filling my mind with all these dreadful memories
not even the firefighters can extinguish it now
overwhelmed by all the trauma in my life
all i can do is hide
someone come and save me from this wildfire
that wants to take my life

Can you help me?
I'm trying to find my place
What I thought was found was always lost
These people aren't real
Just pieces on a board game
Pushing me around as if they know who I am
But I am unlike these players
I don't play games

Can you help me?
I'm trying to escape this dream
I'm not awake but I clearly see
That these demons are killing me
I want to leave but these chains protect me
From seeing who I am truly meant to be