TRIGGER WARNING*
She is the girl.
She's the girl with her creamy, chocolate eyes.
She's the girl with her curly, crazy hair to match her personality.
She's my best friend.
I can't help but stare up and down at her curves,
but you're not supposed to look at your friends like that, I realized.
It felt like a knife,
similar to the one kept hidden safely in my bedroom,
penetrated my heart.
It hurts.
Having a sleep over with a Christian friend
"Any boys ya like?"
Having to bite my tongue until it bleeds so I won't blurt my secret.
It hurts.
Having one of my closest friends pretends I'm not there,
after I come out to her.
It hurts.
Why am I like this?
I scream into the night,
sharpening my nails and slicing my skin.
I bleed,
it hurts.
Why can't I be normal?
I guess my heart just doesn't go that way,
I guess I'm gay.
She's my best friend.
She's the girl with the curly, crazy hair to match her personality.
She's the girl with her creamy, chocolate eyes.
She's the girl.