Spinning around my room at 2 AM
Empty wine bottle in hand
Huge smile on my face
Cool breeze passing through the drapes
This is what it's like to be alive
This is what it's like to feel brand new

they talk to me,
think i'm listening.
but really, i am swallowing
words of self-hatred.

my heart beats but
there is no sound.
my pulse is felt,
but no life.

when i look in
the mirror,
i see a lot of things,
but none of them are me.

i am trapped inside
my own body,
i yearn to get out.

people think i am
breathing, but no,
i choke.

You need to see the light
How it beams in my eyes
The way the green changes hue
Like the mystical skies

How a sadness runs through me
Like a nail in a wall
When I cracked at the surface
But I never could fall

If you're gonna play this game you need to own a quick wit, because a real man knows his words are stronger than his fists, and you're as strong as any since you've yet to slit your wrists, so take the hope you hold and turn it into bliss

Please stop trusting me.
I love you but you think that's a good thing.
It's not.

Stay away from me.
Don't you know that I'm poison?
I am.

Things don't work out for me.
You say someday they will.
They won't.

I love you so much more than you could ever know.
Go away.

watery eyes squinting against
the pink glamor of the setting sun,
casting marvelous streaks
of cherry cream soda foam
radiating from the heartfelt
warmth

dusk settling, a quiet raven
swinging in the swaying trees
and a fence line lining
the edge of evergreen forests
a white picket fence
cluttered with the ghosts
of memories

a pair of binoculars
held by a silent girl
olive and freckled
of the shower of tear drops
which cascaded from those nights
of aching compassion

facing the other side
solitude presence of one
walked of a thousand steps
back splayed by the salty foams
spat by the restlessness of the sea
an umbrella clasped in his grip

the rain drizzled, throwing
the pink sunsets into arrays
of sweet, sweet melodies
the girl of binocular
and boy of umbrella
a picket fence in between

a relief from destiny,
a rain check into reality
figures of speech echoing
slurring syllables
recounting marbles
that used to roll off
from their laughters
on lovely nights

a girl of binoculars
and boy of umbrellas
dreamt of once a meeting
of one such like this
the raven cries
fear not, deal not
what has there
to be done
when the pink
ceases to refill
your sweet dreams

and the girl smiled
the boy climbed over
the white picket fence
and held her hand,
holding the umbrella
to keep their warmth
sheltered deep within

the girl picked her binoculars
held it close to her pretty cheeks
above her lips,
navigating sights
knowing their memories
will far exceed than that
of the white picket fence