Beneath my laughs
She saw my tears
Then I look back
And she disappears
She had chiseled her name
Into my bones
Then left me astray

I am alone

It seems that I’m lost in a field of clouds
Am I reaching for the stars or crashing down?
These thoughts and this shame
Ricochet through my brain
How do I leave the one thing
That brings a smile to my face?
You told me this was forever
An endless journey we’d endeavor
But I notice the cracks in your words
The spark in your eyes I’d been blind to before
I was distracted by your beautiful demeanor
Lost in your smiles and heartwarming laughter
You look through my eyes and say you love me so
But now I see through your lies, so I must let you go

You're the warmth in my cheeks
And the skip in my heart
The shake in my knees
You break me apart
These walls that I’ve built
With care and precision
Crumble at your will
Unguarded emotion
With you, I can't breathe
But I don't really mind
The burn in my lungs
Tells me I’m alive
I’ll give you the world
If you give me peace
Just hold me tight
And fall down with me

Soundlessly I creep
Into your head
Tiptoe around
Your secrets and dread
I knock upon
Your door of lies
Turn the ****
To peek inside
A humorless laugh
Escapes my lips
How had I known
The secrets you kept
I slam the door
Let my anger rage
Knowing it’d cause
An aching migraine
But it can’t compare
To the hate I feel
Just a manikin of clothes
For you to peel
I’m done with you
And you’re hurtful tricks
You are nothing to me
You *******

What if I fell?
What if I fell and never stopped?
Could I fall through time
Could I exist only within myself?
Then what would happen if I did stop?
Suspended in midair,
Would I find beauty or worthlessness?
Would I find life within my reach
Right then and there?
Or would I see that everything is nothing
That I am, yet I am not.
Am I trapped inside my skin?
Am I trapped in a prosthetic body,
A prosthetic society?
If I lay on the ground
And took a breath
Would the world breathe with me?
Could I become a piece of nature
Could I just simply be?
Why do I search for pointless meanings?
If I found the answers, would I be happy
Or even more alone?
Whys and what ifs cloud my head
The haze is a gentle push
To be more than it is that I am
I feel nothing, yet I feel every little thing
Why won't I accept?
Why do I swim in possibilities
That pull me back and forth?
Dancing around in numbness
Yet emotions sit right next to me
Entertaining the idea
That this is all that's left