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Ryan Topez Mar 2014
Just another girl forging the beat.
Led zeppelin on her tee shirt,  doc martins on her feet.

She walks with a stride
Then blames it on pride,  when really it's the tight leather that surrounds her feet.

Play her any two songs and she'll just nod along.
She'll be wearing a new band in a week.
Letting trends set,  before she takes a hold. Last week she liked her coffee hot, this week she likes it cold.
She went from liking guys with long hair to men who are bald.
And so on and so forth, now she's getting old.

Her youth waisted hiding behind a face painted with short lived fads.
'I'm a lesbian,  this is how I was born, this is who I am, dad.'
Ryan Topez Mar 2014
When I died
Face down in the night
The ambulance
Parked outside

My friends
Much older
Carried me
Over their shoulders

Pumped full
Of something
On the couch
I felt nothing

They thought
I died
That night

In a sea
Of red
Barely breathing
Strapped to a hospital bed

They called
My Father
I never told
My mother

They told
My sister
She could have
Lost her brother

Took over
And I
Went under

I should have died
Alone that night
Ryan Topez Mar 2014
My life,
These times,
The epitome,
Of a downwards trajectory.

My existence is but a career,
I wish to resign,
So consider,
Every crooked letter of this poem
As one step closer to my resignation letter.

Recognise this note,
As my termination,
Of a short life,
Of poorly attempted dedication.

Working this life,
For minimum wage,
With out a break,
Except a broken sense of direction,

Life is merely a career
And I wish to swerve,
I wish to veer,
I wish for my torn family,
To not shed a tear.
Quitting Time, Again
  Mar 2014 Ryan Topez
Dylan Lavercombe
I lost my way through the empty place,
vacant, with an unrecognizable face,
the nails stick out of the frame,
trying to recall when my last tetanus shot was, i remember the pain,
couldn't feel the blood rushing out,
they asked me what i was looking at, laying on the ground,
i said "the trees, birds, the way the leaves blow in the breeze, a peaceful sound,
they tried to calm my nerves, but i was calm, as calm as the water at low tide,
on that early morning, stolen, boat ride,
those are the memories i will have for ever, my dearest memory,
and when i say dearest memory, i mean it cost me alot, after that court date and probation meeting on the 6th of January,
Ryan Topez Mar 2014
Emotions thinner than the tin
That my dinner came from
Ambitions gone like my mind
At the party after prom

Skin scratched and stained
A life time of regret
Worth the pain

Not wanting to get out of bed in the morning
Legs gone lame
But no ones mourning

No reason to find direction
Writing plain, without discretion
Caring little and less about forged perfection

Living on a disposable income
Hoping I find long term affection

Still waiting patiently on that one discovery
Anything to separate myself from me
My shins from my knees

There's a windy city chill
But there's no use blaming the pills

Hands left hanging
Like a bandanna
Dangling, waving
From the homeless man's head

Expression couldn't make me a dime
In todays market of drones
Still feeling fine
Without staring into my phone
Ryan Topez Mar 2014
My whiskey habit is complimented then insulted by the ever temperamental voice of Jim Morrison,
I listen to Alabama Song by The Doors
I throw my pen and page
In an anger induced rage
As my mind recites the wrong words
To his poems and songs
His voice plays on repeat
All i can do is blame myself as the primitive synth dances it's oscillating tunes through one of my depleted senses.
My hearing
Mojo Rising's face crudely made into pop art painting by a fan, an idoliser's image
Suddenly the fender telecaster takes over the smokey airways
Hypnotising, mesmerising
as it fills the space between the barely conscious being and the walls that surround
The tempo of the snare, tom and high hat slows
I now have time to gather my ever harsh and bitter thoughts
Harsh like the whiskey, bitter like me
Errors are inevitable, go **** yourselves
Ryan Topez Mar 2014
Night life fades to dead days
I looked at you and you didn't look the other way

You sat next to me by the bronze horse statue
In the heart of the city

On the seventeenth floor car park
Underneath the over head cranes

The sound of hollow trains
Screeched past then faded away
Like they had a better place to be

The company of a drink would have made the time fly
But alas, I was with out my flask
On this cool summer night

So high above the passersby
Telling each other poorly constructed truths
With a hint of carefully thought out lies

You creased your jeans
I rolled my sleeves
You dotted the I's
I crossed the T's

More than acquaintances
Less than friends
Popular amongst each other
Far from setting trends
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